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Episode 15: Why “It’s Okay to Not Be Okay” Isn’t the Whole Truth

In this episode, I dive into the complexities of grief and the widely accepted phrase, “It’s okay to not be okay.” And while I understand the intention behind it, I’m challenging that narrative — because I don’t actually believe we’ve mastered what it truly means. When someone says they’re not okay, the instinct — whether from others or ourselves — is often to fix, to soothe, to make it go away. But if we’re trying to fix it... are we really saying it’s okay?

I share what this looks like in my own life since losing my daughter, and how I’ve learned to hold space for emotional pain without rushing to rescue myself from it. This is an honest conversation about vulnerability, discomfort, and what it means to create a culture where we allow each other — and ourselves — to feel fully.

This episode is an invitation to go deeper. To stop using band-aids for what needs holding. To understand that compassion isn't about fixing — it's about being with. I’ll talk about the power of witnessing pain, the gift of emotional honesty, and why it's time we stopped performing resilience and started practicing it — even when it’s messy. Because life is messy... but it's within the mess that we find the beauty.

I discuss the distinction between supporting and saving, and why self-compassion and authentic connection are more important than mere platitudes. If you’ve ever felt pressure to hide your hurt or minimise your mess, if you’ve ever felt unseen in your struggles or struggled to support someone else in theirs, this episode is for you.

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