Welcome to But Why? — real talk on messy minds and messier systems. Hosted by two psychologists, Kristin and Laura, we dive deep into the psychology of human experience: from mental health and identity to power, culture, and the systems that shape our lives. Expect thoughtful conversations, critical questions, and honest reflections on how people—and the world—really work. No self-help platitudes. No easy answers. Just meaningful, accessible dialogue for curious minds. Topics we explore: • P ...
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But Why Do We Get So Defensive? | Shame, Identity & The Psychology Behind the Pushback
1:18:35
1:18:35
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From “not all men” to “I was just joking,” defensiveness is everywhere. But what’s really going on underneath? In this episode, Kristin and Laura unpack the psychology of defensiveness - how it protects us, how it shows up in everyday interactions, and how it connects to deeper systems of power. With stories about awkward meetings, parenting, and f…
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But Why Are Men Falling for This? | The Psychology of the Manosphere, Misogyny & Modern Masculinity
1:36:08
1:36:08
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In this special guest episode, Kristin and Laura are joined by Oliver Niehaus to explore why so many men and boys are being pulled into the Manosphere. From red pill influencers to anti-intellectual rants and fragile masculinity, we unpack: • Why the manosphere sells grievance disguised as growth • How patriarchy harms men — and why they struggle t…
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But Why Is Joy "Basic" for Women? | Gendered Taste, Cultural Shame & Internalized Misogyny
1:09:05
1:09:05
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1:09:05
In this thought-provoking episode, Kristin and Laura ask why women’s joy so often gets dismissed as “basic.” From Taylor Swift fandoms to fantasy novels, they unpack the deep psychological roots of how gendered taste is constructed—and why we feel guilty for what we love. They dive into: • Why "guilty pleasures" are a feminist issue • The Enlighten…
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But Why Are Boys Turning to Misogyny? | Masculinity, Media & the World of Adolescence
1:10:05
1:10:05
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In this episode, Kristin and Laura take a psychological deep dive into Netflix’s Adolescence, a gripping series that explores how one teenage boy ends up committing an unthinkable act. But instead of focusing on who did it, the show—and this conversation—asks why. Together, we explore: • What incel culture is and how boys are drawn into it • The ro…
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But Why Is Sport Still Built for Men? | How History, Media & Misogyny Keep Women Out
58:01
58:01
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58:01
From Yorkie bars to Olympic podiums, women in sport have always faced more than just the competition. In this episode, Kristin and Laura explore how sport has been systematically shaped to exclude women — and how this exclusion is still happening today. From overt bans in the 20th century to TikTok trolls and pay gaps in 2025, we unpack: • Why wome…
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But Why Does Progress Always Scare Them? | A Backlash History of Women’s Rights
1:10:47
1:10:47
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1:10:47
From bicycles to boardrooms, women’s progress has always triggered backlash. In this episode, Kristin and Laura trace a powerful throughline across 140 years of history — showing how each leap forward for women has been met with a push to drag them back. We unpack: • Why “bicycle face” was invented to stop women riding freely • How 1950s housewives…
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But Why Don’t We Feel Motivated? | Self-Determination Theory, Burnout & the Myth of Willpower
1:12:27
1:12:27
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Is it burnout, is it capitalism, or are you just lazy? (Spoiler: it’s not the last one.) In this episode, Kristin and Laura unpack what motivation actually is — and why we keep expecting ourselves to push through exhaustion like it’s a personal failure. Guided by Self-Determination Theory (SDT), they explore: • The difference between high vs low qu…
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But Why Are We Still Getting Sport So Wrong? | Myths, Misogyny & the Stories Women Aren’t Telling
1:11:27
1:11:27
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In this episode, Kristin and Laura are joined by Amy and Jen to unpack their latest books Myths of Sport Performance and Women Working in Sport. From gender bias in coaching to the emotional toll of surviving male-dominated spaces, we explore: • Why performance myths won’t die — and who profits when they stay alive • The gap between academia and so…
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But Why Don’t Resolutions Work? | Goal Setting, Burnout & Being Kinder to Ourselves
1:02:28
1:02:28
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1:02:28
It’s our holiday party and we’re breaking down the science (and the BS) of New Year’s resolutions — all while sipping wine, comparing tattoos, and trying not to set anything on fire. In this festive-but-serious episode, Kristin and Laura explore: • Why so many resolutions fall apart by February • How to make goals that actually work for you • The p…
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But Why Is Burnout Different for Us? | Autism, ADHD & the Cost of Hiding Who We Are
1:15:50
1:15:50
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1:15:50
In this follow-up to our general burnout episode, Kristin and Laura explore what burnout looks like through a neurodivergent lens — and why it so often goes unrecognised, misdiagnosed, or misunderstood. Between chaotic mornings, ADHD hyperfocus, executive dysfunction, and autistic masking, we unpack: • What autistic and ADHD burnout really feel lik…
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But Why Are We All Burnt Out? | The Psychology, Politics & Pressure Behind Exhaustion
1:10:36
1:10:36
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1:10:36
We were going to do something light and fun. But then… we remembered we’re burnt out. In this episode, Kristin and Laura explore the complex emotional, physical, and political layers of burnout — not just as a personal feeling, but as a symptom of the systems we live in. Between rainbow sightings, chaotic dog farts, and some very real science, we u…
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But Why Does Everything Feel So Personal? | The Socioecological Model & The Systems Shaping Us
1:08:38
1:08:38
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1:08:38
Why do we blame ourselves for things that aren’t really our fault? In this deeply human (and deeply caffeinated) episode, Kristin and Laura explore the socioecological model — a powerful psychological framework that explains how our personal struggles are shaped by the people, places, and politics around us. With stories about concussion panic, dog…
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But Why Is Mental Health Still So Misunderstood? | Wellbeing & the Psychology of Feeling Human
1:10:44
1:10:44
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1:10:44
Is it anxiety? Is it burnout? Or are you just human in a broken world? In this vulnerable and wide-ranging episode, Kristin and Laura dive deep into what mental health really means — and why it’s often confused with mental illness. Through personal stories, psychology frameworks, and way too many Twilight references, they unpack: • The difference b…
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But Why Does Speaking Up Still Feel Risky? | Psychological Safety, Power & Performance Culture
1:00:48
1:00:48
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1:00:48
From silent meetings to shouty comment sections, what makes some spaces feel safe — and others, like you can’t speak at all? In this episode, Kristin and Laura unpack the concept of psychological safety — not just as a corporate buzzword, but as a critical piece of being human. Rooted in decades of research and personal experience, they explore: • …
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But Why Do Witches Still Haunt Us? | How Misogyny & Media Keep the Witch Alive
1:04:59
1:04:59
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1:04:59
In Part 2 of our Halloween series, we move from broomsticks to boardrooms — exploring how the witch trials never truly ended. Kristin and Laura dive into how the image of the witch morphed into modern misogyny, media tropes, and political smear campaigns. From Sabrina the Teenage Witch to Hillary Clinton, we unpack: • How "witch" became a slur for …
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But Why Are Women Still Being Burned at the Stake? | Witch Hunts, Patriarchy & Historical Misogyny
1:04:47
1:04:47
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TW: This episode contains mentions/discussions around difficult topics such as death, sexual assault, and assault more broadly. Why were witches really hunted — and why does it still matter today? In this Halloween special of But Why: Real talk on messy minds and messier systems, psychologists Kristin and Laura explore the history of witch trials t…
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But Why Is Sexism Still a Thing? | Ambivalent Sexism and Gender Roles
55:23
55:23
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55:23
TW: This episode discusses potentially distressing topics such as sexism and related topics (e.g., harassment or assault) Why does sexism still feel so damn relentless in 2024? In this episode of But Why: Real talk on messy minds and messier systems, psychologists Kristin and Laura unpack ambivalent sexism — the sneaky blend of benevolent and hosti…
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But Why Is Being Ourselves So Hard? | Identity, Authenticity & Performing for Belonging
55:10
55:10
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55:10
From band t-shirts to burnout, Kristin and Laura ask a deceptively simple question: why is it so hard to just be ourselves? In this honest and often hilarious episode, they unpack the psychology of identity — how it’s formed, how it’s performed, and what happens when it doesn’t match our sense of self. Together, they explore: • The difference betwe…
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