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How to connect with a child that shuts you down (without losing your cool)

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Manage episode 506365661 series 2898713
Content provided by Cindy Hovington, Ph.D. and Cindy Hovington. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Cindy Hovington, Ph.D. and Cindy Hovington or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

Send us a text

This episode will change how you see your child’s moods and how you respond to them.

If you’ve ever tiptoed around your child in the morning, worried the “wrong” cereal bowl or shirt will set off a meltdown, this conversation is for you.

Joining me is Dr. Alex Reed, pediatric clinical psychologist and mom of two, who has spent years helping families understand temperament, moodiness, and emotional regulation. Together, we pull back the curtain on what’s really happening when your child seems unpredictable, reactive, or even says, “I hate you.”

You’ll learn:

  • Why some kids seem “moody” from the start and what temperament really means.
  • The hidden role of shame in meltdowns (and why your child pushes you away even when you’re trying to help).
  • The front door vs. side door approach and why lecturing, correcting, or over-validating often backfires.
  • The science-backed strategies that actually work: modeling, storytelling, and overhearing.
  • How to set calm, clear boundaries without escalating the conflict.
  • The #1 skill you must practice first is your own regulation.

This is not about quick fixes or “tricks” for behavior. It’s about raising kids who can handle their big feelings, and parents who can show up with confidence, calm, and connection—even in the hardest moments.

By the end of this episode, you’ll have a new way to think about your child’s temperament, and practical steps you can use today to stop walking on eggshells.

Join the conversation about this episode on our private Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10172344324640258&set=gm.1942367649950164&idorvanity=677093716477570

Read a science article about this:

Predicting child problem behaviour at school age: The role of maternal sensitivity, child temperament and theory of mind

Support the show

Record your question, or share a parenting insight in a 1 min audio we will share on the podcast https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast

Become a Reflective Parent using our evidence-based program:

Grab a Free Resource:

Email: [email protected]

📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group

🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

  continue reading

243 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 
Manage episode 506365661 series 2898713
Content provided by Cindy Hovington, Ph.D. and Cindy Hovington. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Cindy Hovington, Ph.D. and Cindy Hovington or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

Send us a text

This episode will change how you see your child’s moods and how you respond to them.

If you’ve ever tiptoed around your child in the morning, worried the “wrong” cereal bowl or shirt will set off a meltdown, this conversation is for you.

Joining me is Dr. Alex Reed, pediatric clinical psychologist and mom of two, who has spent years helping families understand temperament, moodiness, and emotional regulation. Together, we pull back the curtain on what’s really happening when your child seems unpredictable, reactive, or even says, “I hate you.”

You’ll learn:

  • Why some kids seem “moody” from the start and what temperament really means.
  • The hidden role of shame in meltdowns (and why your child pushes you away even when you’re trying to help).
  • The front door vs. side door approach and why lecturing, correcting, or over-validating often backfires.
  • The science-backed strategies that actually work: modeling, storytelling, and overhearing.
  • How to set calm, clear boundaries without escalating the conflict.
  • The #1 skill you must practice first is your own regulation.

This is not about quick fixes or “tricks” for behavior. It’s about raising kids who can handle their big feelings, and parents who can show up with confidence, calm, and connection—even in the hardest moments.

By the end of this episode, you’ll have a new way to think about your child’s temperament, and practical steps you can use today to stop walking on eggshells.

Join the conversation about this episode on our private Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10172344324640258&set=gm.1942367649950164&idorvanity=677093716477570

Read a science article about this:

Predicting child problem behaviour at school age: The role of maternal sensitivity, child temperament and theory of mind

Support the show

Record your question, or share a parenting insight in a 1 min audio we will share on the podcast https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast

Become a Reflective Parent using our evidence-based program:

Grab a Free Resource:

Email: [email protected]

📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group

🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

  continue reading

243 episodes

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