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The Let Them Theory: Support, Don't Rescue

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In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan dive into Chapters 16 and 17 of Mel Robbins’ The Let Them Theory: The More You Rescue, The More They Sink and How to Provide Support the Right Way.

They explore why stepping in to “rescue” often backfires, how shame and denial complicate real support, and why presence and patience are more powerful than quick fixes. Along the way, they share stories about hidden struggles, money boundaries, and what it means to be a calm, nonjudgmental presence in a crisis.

Listeners will also hear a candid discussion of “harmful help” versus healthy support, the psychology of ignoring warnings until consequences hit, and how frameworks from Gretchen Rubin and BJ Fogg can shape motivation and lasting change.

If you’ve ever felt torn between helping someone you love and protecting your own peace, this conversation will help you navigate the difference between rescuing and truly supporting.

Support the show

  continue reading

Chapters

1. Introduction & Calm Presence in Crisis (00:00:00)

2. Support vs. Fixing (00:05:33)

3. Boundaries, Money, and Emotional Presence (00:13:35)

4. Harmful Help, Healthy Support, and Tough Choices (00:17:28)

5. Warnings, Motivation, and Change Models (00:27:26)

6. Different Motivation Styles & Wrap-Up (00:33:42)

202 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 

In this episode of Mindfully Masculine, Charles and Dan dive into Chapters 16 and 17 of Mel Robbins’ The Let Them Theory: The More You Rescue, The More They Sink and How to Provide Support the Right Way.

They explore why stepping in to “rescue” often backfires, how shame and denial complicate real support, and why presence and patience are more powerful than quick fixes. Along the way, they share stories about hidden struggles, money boundaries, and what it means to be a calm, nonjudgmental presence in a crisis.

Listeners will also hear a candid discussion of “harmful help” versus healthy support, the psychology of ignoring warnings until consequences hit, and how frameworks from Gretchen Rubin and BJ Fogg can shape motivation and lasting change.

If you’ve ever felt torn between helping someone you love and protecting your own peace, this conversation will help you navigate the difference between rescuing and truly supporting.

Support the show

  continue reading

Chapters

1. Introduction & Calm Presence in Crisis (00:00:00)

2. Support vs. Fixing (00:05:33)

3. Boundaries, Money, and Emotional Presence (00:13:35)

4. Harmful Help, Healthy Support, and Tough Choices (00:17:28)

5. Warnings, Motivation, and Change Models (00:27:26)

6. Different Motivation Styles & Wrap-Up (00:33:42)

202 episodes

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