Building Intuition: The Key To Self-Trust With Sabine Gedeon

The Mindset and Self-Mastery Show

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“I’m building that expectation in my intuition that we’re going to figure out whatever the day brings.”

In this episode, Nick speaks with executive coach Sabine Gedeon about her journey in personal development, the importance of subconscious programming, and the role of intuition and self-trust in achieving success. Sabine shares her unique nightly routine of listening to curated books, her focus on building intuition, and the significance of daily practices like journaling and gratitude.

What to listen for:

Daily routines help in building self-trust and discipline
Journaling is a powerful tool for gratitude and reflection
Self-commitment is crucial for personal growth
Personal development is a continuous journey influenced by various factors
Self-awareness and accountability are crucial for personal development
Grief is a process that everyone experiences in different forms
Understanding the spectrum of emotions helps in personal healing
Identifying core wounds can lead to deeper emotional understanding
Self-awareness allows for better navigation through life’s challenges

“If you’re three years out from having lost something… and you’re still feeling the emotions as strong… that means that you’re not feeling grief for that particular situation… that is grief that is underneath something.”

Grief can sometimes mask deeper emotional wounds that haven’t been fully processed or uncovered yet.
Emotional intensity that persists for years might not be about the original loss—it could be tapping into older, unresolved pain.
Life events often act as triggers that awaken deeper layers of grief we didn’t even know we were carrying.
Long-standing sadness isn’t always a sign of “not moving on”—it might be a cue that there’s more healing to explore.
This kind of reflection invites you to ask, “What else is this really about?” instead of staying stuck on the surface story.

“I have learned… that things [don’t] happen because I’m doing, I’m physically doing, or it’s the work that I’m doing. I understand that I am part of this larger universe and that I can actually get support.”

Sometimes, stepping back and aligning energetically brings more results than over-efforting.
There’s power in trusting that the universe (or life, or God, or spirit—whatever you believe in) has your back when you stop trying to control everything.
Receiving support—whether divine, emotional, or practical—is just as crucial as taking action.
Letting go of the “I have to do it all” mindset can open up space for unexpected breakthroughs and guidance.
Real productivity isn’t always about doing more—it’s about being in the right flow and trusting the process.

About Sabine Gedeon

Sabine Gedeon is the Founder of Transformed Leadership Institute and CEO of Gedeon Enterprises, with nearly 20 years of experience guiding leaders in startups and Fortune 500 companies. She combines human-centered principles with tech-enabled solutions to create customized leadership and talent development programs. As an author and Professional Certified Coach (PCC), Sabine is dedicated to empowering leaders at all levels, helping them tackle key challenges in growth and transformation.

Resources:

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Click To View The Episode Transcript

Nick McGowan (00:06.783)
Hello and welcome to the Mindset and Self-Mastery Show. I’m your host, Nick McGowan. Today on the show we have Sabin Gideon. Sabin, how you doing today?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (00:17.624)
Well, thank you, Nick. How are you?

Nick McGowan (00:19.669)
I’m good. I’m looking forward to our conversation. I always enjoy when I get to shoot the shit and just talk to somebody beforehand and there are certain times where I look up and I’m like, man, it’s been like 15, 20 minutes. This could have been part of the episode. So why don’t you kick us off? Tell us what you do for a living and what’s one thing most people don’t know about you that’s maybe a little odd or bizarre.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (00:40.002)
Yeah, so I play a couple of different roles, primarily as an executive coach and a speaker, working with organizations, their leadership, just helping them be better humans.

As far as something that’s bizarre, I thinking about this, I think probably the most bizarre thing, and you’ll probably appreciate this, is every night I go, I listen to Audible, so I go to bed with a playlist of books that are curated each quarter, and so that is my way of helping me to program my subconscious mind. And I’ve actually been doing this, I didn’t realize that that’s what I was doing, probably in like 2000.

10 or 12 or something like I was like heavily into church and so I wanted to like learn the Bible and I was like I don’t want to sit there and read the Bible so I used to play the Bible app while I slept as a way to kind of like memorize help me to memorize the scriptures a little bit more it wasn’t until I got into personal development professional development the work that I do now that I learned that like I was literally programming my subconscious so to this day like I can pull Bible quotes

Nick McGowan (01:26.123)
Hmm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (01:49.36)
I can’t tell you where they are, but they will come to me like in conversation randomly.

Nick McGowan (01:56.705)
I love that. So I think there’s kind of a two part pieces to that. I don’t know how to put that properly, but I think some of that is like a God situation where he’s like, hey, here’s this verse. And other parts of it is just straight up your subconscious mind that’s recalling things. Cause you were filtering that in constantly. Did you, do you remember, I think it was that Bible app, cause that’s the one that Craig Groeschel created like in the mid 2000s, like the Bible app.

think at one point Samuel L was one of the voices. Did you listen to his voice to help you go to sleep and just read the Bible to you? man. Yeah, just captivated the entire time. Keep going Samuel. Now I’m gonna read Samuel one and two with Samuel’s voice, total nerd. So that is cool. I do appreciate that. I think it’s interesting how we can tie different things into just our way of being.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (02:26.05)
Mm-hmm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (02:30.592)
I would definitely, I would never fall asleep listening to Samuel L. Jackson.

Nick McGowan (02:53.781)
just by the music we listen to, the shows that we watch, things that we do, et cetera, et cetera. But it’s also, it depends on what we wanna get out of it and who we are. Like I think about it like this, I watch a lot of Criminal Minds, like CSI and stuff like that. And I saw something recently that was like, you watch, what was it? If your thought of relaxing is watching three or four episodes of True Crime, you should probably talk to a therapist. And at first I thought, well, I pay at least three people monthly.

to help me with things and I have weekly sessions and I’d watch this every night. But I watch it from the aspect of watching people do incredibly tough things and really horrific situations and still keep their cool and they’re calm about it instead of going, well, how did somebody just member somebody like not fan of that, but like what did they do in the aftermath, et cetera. So with the books that you listen to and the things that you’re kind of putting in your mind, are you

you said it’s curated. are there things you’re like this quarter, I really want to work on these things and you do it consciously, as well as subconsciously. But what are those things?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (04:00.46)
Yeah, so funny enough with the true crime stuff, like I used to be a big like SUV, no, SBU fan, right? And

Nick McGowan (04:07.273)
SvU here.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (04:09.834)
It was like, I was always mesmerized by like how they solved it. Cause I was always trying to figure out who the person was. It wasn’t until like I started going through my healing journey that like once I started going through my healing journey, I couldn’t watch those shows anymore because now I started getting triggered before it was about the cops and how they were going to solve it and everything. And then once I started to do my own work, I started relating to the victim.

Nick McGowan (04:24.481)
Hmm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (04:35.694)
in the situation and so like I had to stop that. So kudos to you for being in that space where you could still watch those shows. So for me, when it comes to like, guess, right now what I’m focusing on is building my intuition. So like, again, I’ve identified an area that I really wanna strengthen and we’ll talk about this in the conversation. I realized that as a kid growing up,

you know, just the situations and the circumstances that were around my surroundings. Like I wasn’t allowed to feel or I wasn’t allowed to express emotion. And so for me, emotion was just like, I didn’t have time to deal with it. Right. And I put it, I rationalized like, well, I’m a type A achiever. I don’t have time to be stuck in emotions and all this other stuff. But I just, it was stunted. I was emotionally immature. And so as I started to learn about my emotions, it

allowed me and obviously you know when that stuff starts coming up you have to process it but it also allowed me to realize that deep down inside I didn’t yet know how to trust myself.

Nick McGowan (05:42.603)
Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (05:42.688)
And so as I’ve been doing this work of learning how to build that self trust, a lot of that has to do with the intuition. And so that’s where I’m focused on right now for the sake of being able to say, all right, if someone asks something or if I have a decision to make and it doesn’t feel good that I can go within myself and.

Trust that if I got a knot in my stomach, then that’s a no or if I have butterflies that may be a yes So that’s where i’m focused on for this particular quarter

Nick McGowan (06:12.961)
So like I said to you before we even hit record, even if we have a topic in mind, we might go a different way or it might all just kind of tie together. And I think there are the pieces, especially with the intuition, that there are times I have people on that talk about that. And sometimes there are things that will continue after we’ve recorded and we’re just hanging out and like shooting the ship. And intuition is one of those things that’s a moving target for a lot of people. Some people are really, I guess, in a black and white way.

Logical and lack emotions because they lead with logic and therefore it’s harder to tap into the intuition if you are Epithetic and you are hyper emotional or more on the emotional side at least it can be somewhat easier But still clouded based on other judgments biases interpretations all that sort of stuff You mentioned that you’re getting the last word on power We need to connect again after you go through that because that talks about not only intuition, but the

subconscious winning strategy that was created as a kid to be able to win in life. And those things that are created to say, well, this situation to stay safe or love, this is what I do. And this is how I do it from here. That then takes away from our trust. So to be able to actually dive deeper into that trust is a unique path for each person. There are like core competencies and things of that sort when it comes to like how we go about it. But each one of us needs to

discover it differently. So what are you doing to be able to not only tap into it, but to consciously tie it together? Like how you when you tie your shoes, like at this point, you just don’t even think about it, you just do it. But you had to actually physically put that together. And I think the same thing when it comes to your intuition, there is a feel that’s in there. You’d even mentioned about butterflies. Sometimes that can be a good thing of like, there’s a notion, but there that can also lead to a negative thing, depending on who you are and how you are. So what are you doing to actually be able to

work through that and tighten that up, but put the pieces together for yourself.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (08:17.294)
Yeah, so it’s multiple aspects, right? So when you think about creating a new neural pathway in our minds, right? That requires a lot of reinforcement, first and foremost, awareness that it’s missing. As far as like, I’ll give you holistically what I do to help support, because you can hear like, oh, she’s building her intuition, but it’s not just enough to like feel into the situation. So for me, I have…

Nick McGowan (08:30.977)
You

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (08:46.68)
morning routine. That morning routine includes working out in the morning. After working out, I do a two mile walk around my neighborhood. And within that two mile walk, I’m listening to a book. And usually it’s some mindset related book right now I’m listening to more Ask by Mark Victor Hansen and his wife, Crystal. And it’s all about learning how to ask learning how to be in situations and

Nick McGowan (08:55.713)
Okay.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (09:14.092)
you know, being curious, being inquisitive. So a lot of the examples are like external asking, but it’s also still supporting those moments where like, you know, if an opportunity presents itself, like most people are going to freeze or I’m like, I don’t want to ask because I don’t want to seem annoying or I don’t want to say anything because that and it’s just like, no, like trusting that you in asking the answer may be yes. So that’s like one element.

though it seems unrelated. When I get back from my walk, I journal. We were talking about journaling earlier. So I have this

10 things that I’m grateful for. That’s what I journal every single day. The first thing always starts off with, I’m grateful I woke up this morning, because that’s something to be grateful for. I say it when I wake up, but I write it down every day. The other piece to that in that same sentence or in that same line is, and I started my day successful. That’s intentional, again, because for me, starting my day successful is waking up at five, going to the gym, and doing my two plus mile walk.

Nick McGowan (09:57.931)
the

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (10:19.02)
Right? So when I do that, I write in there, I started my day successful. What am I doing? I’m programming my subconscious mind to say the day’s already successful. Right? And I said what I was, I committed to doing. So that’s another level of building self-trust because my goal the night before was to wake up at five, work out and do my two mile walk.

So that is, again, building that trust. The commitments that we make to ourselves, this is a side, the commitments we make to ourselves are the biggest commitments that we can make. And when you are continuously letting yourself down or you say you’re gonna do something and you don’t do it.

that erode self-trust really, really quickly. So I celebrate in my journal that, hey, I did it. I did what I said I was going to do. And once I’m done with the journaling, I have a couple of prayers, meditations that I’ll run through just to ground myself. So that’s the basis of the daily routine. The books that I choose, they’re books, Florence.

Is it Florence Shin? I think that’s her name. She has this book, The Path of Intuition, How to Win in Life. She has several books around that space. I guess you put them under the metaphysical pieces. So I’m really listening to books around people that speak to that. And then I’m trying to think of, is there anything else that I do? And my nightly routine is also centered around.

Nick McGowan (11:30.155)
Mm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (11:50.35)
prayer, meditation, something. One of the things that she says in that path, the intuition book is, you know, before you go to bed at night or before you fall asleep, say the affirmation, in the morning, I’ll know exactly what to do. And so right before bed or right before I fall asleep, I will repeat that several times. In the morning, I will know exactly what to do. Doesn’t necessarily mean I have a plan, but I’m,

Nick McGowan (12:03.989)
Hmm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (12:15.97)
building that expectation in my intuition that we’re going to figure out whatever the day brings.

Nick McGowan (12:21.921)
I think that can also be a fun challenge and activity for people to where you can say, how do I do this thing? What do I do with this? What’s this situation look like? And then toss it up. Now we’ll toss it to your subconscious and say you work on it. Give me the answer in the morning. It doesn’t happen every single time, but there’s always an inkling the next day of something to do with it. And I’ve done it before where I’ve been like, somebody told me this, I’ll try it like.

whatever, I’m sort of skeptical when it comes to stuff at times and work through it and try it and go, Oh, yeah, like randomly mid day the next day, it’s like, try this little thing. Oh, really? Where the hell did that come from? Because it’s always working underneath there. But having those routines, and I appreciate that everybody has their own routine. I also, and like I said to you when we before we hit record, I like to talk about like the human side of all of it. Having a routine is great.

if you become addicted to just the routine of it, like I’d said to you even about journaling, like I was just doing the thing. And I would like write and look around and be like, I’m bored, this sucks, what am I doing? Oh, I’m not actually paying attention to it. It sounds like you have intention with the stuff that you’re doing, but also how do you handle when you wake up at 530? Or you wake up at eight o’clock because you were frigging tired and your body is just like, fuck it, you need to sleep. do you…

Do you then beat yourself up with that? How do you show yourself grace? Because that’s the humanity side of it. Like we can all figure out what these big plans are and like, I’ll spend 19 hours a day doing all this stuff. Like cool, you can plan for it, but it’s the execution and then the grace that you show yourself when you don’t always execute properly. Like how do you handle that?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (14:03.798)
Yeah, great question. Actually, Monday, Monday and Tuesday of this week, I like I don’t I was tired. I feel for a lack of better time. I was tired and my body I ended up waking up like in the middle of the night both nights and so I didn’t my morning routine was completely thrown off. And so I was just like, Okay, when do I just woke up, grab my coffee? When do I have time in my day to fit this in the commitment for the

Nick McGowan (14:12.513)
the

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (14:32.493)
journaling for me is about building discipline. Like today is the 100th day of the year. Why do I know that? Because it’s the 100th journal entry, right? And so for me, I know the importance of gratitude and the power that that emits out into the universe. And so that is more of like an internal conviction of I want to do this because there’s so much that I’m grateful for. And when I’m writing out this gratitude, it’s not just for the things that…

Nick McGowan (14:41.024)
Nice.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (15:02.156)
happen. There’s stuff that happened yesterday that I talk about. There’s stuff that I’m anticipating today. And then there are things that are far out in the future that I don’t I don’t know how to do that. But I’m calling it in. And so for me, it’s a it’s a present and a future thing that like, if I don’t do it, or it’s part of the process, right? It’s like, you know, when you think about if you have a goal to start a business, right? Yes, you’re going to create the business plan, you’re going to do the website, you’re going to do all those other things. I have learned

decondition myself from thinking that things happen because I’m doing, I’m physically doing, or it’s the work that I’m doing. I understand that I am part of this larger universe and that I can actually get support. And quite frankly, I need that additional support. So that’s what keeps me doing the journaling. Even if it’s like the last thing I do at night, my commitment to myself is that I’m gonna do it for my present.

Nick McGowan (15:48.609)
Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (15:59.278)
present version of myself and the future version of myself.

Nick McGowan (16:02.901)
That’s cool. When you think about all the things that you do, even if you wake up at eight o’clock or 5.15 or whatever, and you do the things and you figure out when you can do it throughout the day, you still have the things that you’ve figured out that work for you. And those are the things today. In two years, you might shift, you might adjust. Hell, you might have this for the rest of your life. This might be the thing you do for the rest of your life. May not be. And I think that ties into how

there are times I’ll talk about purpose and people can kind of assume like there’s one purpose for your life. You’re here to do this one thing which I wholeheartedly disagree with. I think there are ebbs and flows and just how you show up and how the world is at the moment, what you do and all of that and likewise with your own routines. So the routine that you have that you found that worked for you, as you do that work, you might find, this thing really works more like the journaling. It’s easy for me to go back to because

It’s not really my jam. I can do it, but I will do it in a different way. Just like how you’re saying I’m going through and setting all these things up. I think at times that most people don’t realize that they do have habits. Like you have a nighttime habit. Sometimes it’s just sitting on IG for two hours or TikTok or whatever else. Like there’s still a habit in place and we can sometimes make little shifts to that. I was having a hard time.

winding down at the end of the night, like I would basically work on projects until I was like, fried and then go, it’s one 30 in the morning, I should go to sleep. And then I would try to go to sleep and be up for like another hour and a half because my brain’s still going around and figured out that if I just listened to binaural music and some meditative music, that’ll start to slow me down a little bit, even why we do some things on our own. So I guess the challenge really for all of us is just take what you’re doing right now and go, well,

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (17:39.512)
Mm-hmm.

Nick McGowan (18:00.821)
What’s the little change that I can make? Because everything you’re doing right now, you didn’t start last Tuesday, right?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (18:07.95)
Not at all.

Nick McGowan (18:08.179)
Yeah, this is the thing you’ve been doing for a bit. So let’s break that down a little bit because I and I want to get to the main topic that we’re going to talk about. But I really love this because this ties into the intuition ties into discipline and all that. But how did this actually start to formulate? I’m sure some of it was like, well, somebody said something. So why the hell not? Let me try it. Let me try this. Let me try that. But where did you start to formulate and see some major changes as you worked through that process for yourself?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (18:34.316)
Yeah, that’s a great question. And I wholeheartedly agree with you because sometimes you can hear people and they’re like, I spend the first 15 hours of my day doing all these things, right? And that’s not realistic for everyone. I do say that if you study enough

people who are successful, right? And successful is subjective. But if you study people who are successful, they have a routine. There is something that they do. To your point, journaling is not your thing, right? But you’re also paying all these other people to support you in different ways. So that is part of what you do to keep.

mind body and spirit where it needs to so it’s a matter of testing i’ve tested a lot of stuff out like i i used to have like the meditation apps to come like my brain is going 100 like that’s not for me when i say i meditate i’m literally like i have a prayer and i’m speaking something and getting into the feeling of it so to each his own what really

Nick McGowan (19:18.657)
Yeah.

Nick McGowan (19:27.233)
you

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (19:32.782)
What really started me on this path for this routine, I had signed up with a coach at the end of 2022. And part of the coaching was that every morning they were on the East Coast. So every morning.

at 6 30 we met for 90 days and it was like it wasn’t motivational talk but like he was having us read through books like and breaking stuff down so I literally that was like the first time where I was just like oh no I have to be up by 6 30 because I just paid this man a lot of money um so I had to be up so then it was just like okay well if if I have to do this at 6 30 by the time that ends it’s seven o’clock

Nick McGowan (20:01.249)
Yeah, sure.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (20:12.43)
It doesn’t give me enough time to do what else I need to do like workout or anything like that. So I was just like, okay, well, maybe if I wake up at five, by the time I get dressed, brush my teeth, wash my face, it’ll be 530. I have time to work out. And then when that ends at 630, I still have like 30 minutes or whatever that I can journal. So it was literally signing up for that coaching program that forced me to then rearrange my schedule and I had to work everything around that. What I found was

When I by the time eight o’clock came around I was like wow I’ve accomplished a lot like I felt great. I felt amazing and that’s why that’s quite honestly why I kept doing it because I felt like

just accomplish all of this stuff by the time I sat down to start my day, like I was I was full, if you will, like beaming with you know, all this joy and all this excitement and everything else. And it carried me throughout the day. To your point, there may be another season in my life, like if I’m in a relationship, or if I have children, like that may not, I don’t get those three hours, right? So that season of my life, I’m gonna have to shift it. But really what shifted it was something came around.

Nick McGowan (21:17.825)
Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (21:24.16)
I used it, it works, it’s been working and that’s why we’re using this routine.

Nick McGowan (21:30.485)
Yeah, well even you can break that down too. Because of that situation, that catalyst, you did something about it. But you were also self-aware with it. Like you jumped past that earlier. You said self-awareness and then just went right past it because you’re well past that obviously in your walk and everything else. But that is a big thing. Like if we really break it down in like dumb pieces, you were self-aware of this thing because of the situation, but you also had the accountability that was tied to it. So not to…

not the plug, just coaching, especially the right coaching. But any sort of accountability when it comes to that that helps you to be able to do stuff on your own is super critical and crucial. And I’m glad that you pointed that out too, that like things will change. I had a, I had built this routine that was like an hour and a half in the morning, an hour and a half at night and all these things. Got a girlfriend, moved 1,100 miles away.

We moved into a tiny home and all of that changed. But that’s the thing that we then get to make decisions of how do we change this for what works with me now. Just like what I said earlier where people will say, you know, the one purpose in life or you do this one thing and this should work for everybody. I even think about the stuff that you were saying of like, you felt accomplished. If you didn’t feel accomplished, would you still be doing it? Of course not.

Could you be like, fuck, this is stupid. This doesn’t get me anywhere. This isn’t what I want, whatever. But because it is, you’re gonna continue to do it. Now that might shift, again, you might do this for the rest of your life. Maybe we’ll talk in 40 years and you’re like, yo dude, I am still doing all that stuff. I hope that’s the case. But we’ve gotta give ourselves the flexibility to be aware of what’s going on, the situational awareness, to be able to say, this is what’s happening right now and how do I shift and how have I shifted as a person? But.

I want to think that some of that also ties back to what our situations in life look like. So one of the reasons why I brought you on, wanted to have you on the show was because of grief and being able to talk about all the things that happen with grief. People will say, you know, I have this situation or I do this thing because somebody died years ago or this major catastrophe happened or what have you. We all experience grief. Even if you you, you lose some device.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (23:40.589)
you

Nick McGowan (23:55.777)
You’re like, man, where did I put that stupid thing? You know, this short grief that we probably all go through, where the fuck are my keys? You know, like, there’s a little bit of that, but then it’s you lose a parent or a loved one or something like that. And I think that also can tie into how our discipline shows up or how we step away from it. I mean, what are your thoughts when it comes to that?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (23:58.606)
you

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (24:15.63)
you

Yeah, so you brought up a really great point. Usually when grief is like is being talked about, it’s in the context of you lost someone, right? But if you think about it throughout our lives, like every day we’re cycling through the grief process, right? So to your point, you moved 1100 miles away, right? Like that move away from what was familiar away from like people that you knew, like there’s a grieving process that happens there too. Someone

Graduates from college right and now they’re on their own. There’s a grieving process. So even the good things in life Spring on that grieving process and growth even like believe it or not. We grieve probably more

Nick McGowan (24:49.729)
Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (25:02.996)
in those seasons and in those times where we are growing because parts of us, old parts of us are shedding away as we’re becoming this new version. So, you know, at any given point you are in that grief cycle. And as you know, know, grief is not linear. Like you don’t go through the five steps and then all of sudden you’re like, arrived.

Nick McGowan (25:21.909)
Yeah. Ta-da! Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (25:23.552)
something’s gonna happen, right? Something’s gonna happen and you’re gonna be back in that or something happens and you’re triggered back into bargaining. You step into this new area of your life. You step into entrepreneurship. I remember I was planning on, I had started my business while I was still in corporate and I…

Finally made the leap, so excited. It was a great thing. And I remember June 30th, 2018 was my last day, right? And leading up to that, oh, you couldn’t tell me anything. Like I was just super excited. I woke up July 1st and I looked at myself in the mirror and I’m like, what did I do? And not even just what did I do, but who am I now? Who am I now?

Nick McGowan (26:06.059)
Fuck.

Nick McGowan (26:11.745)
Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (26:14.572)
that identity that I had spent well over a decade building, that next morning, like I had to face like, you’re not her anymore, right? And so again, the grief comes in different ways, even in the best things, it’s about being aware, going back to the emotions, right? Being aware of what emotions are you feeling, right? Every emotion is valid. I used to…

before I started doing emotional work, I used to believe and fall into this consciousness that like there are good emotions and there are bad emotions, right? So, you you’re either happy or you’re sad or, you know, all the anger, all of these are bad until I understood that, no, no, no, no, the entire spectrum of emotions just are. It’s the, it’s the definition that we give to them that makes them good or bad, but we’re meant to experience every single one of them.

Nick McGowan (27:00.149)
Yeah, that’s it.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (27:09.102)
How could you how could you appreciate joy if you didn’t first experience fear, right? Like you wouldn’t you wouldn’t even know the polarity or the difference between the two if they didn’t exist So understanding that we all have this spectrum of emotions There’s this book that I rely on heavily feelings buried alive never die It’s by Truman

Catherine Truman, I’ll get you the initial list. But what I love about that book is she talks about, and we were talking about this in the green room, she talks about epigenetics, right? And how grief, trauma, all of that, it’s starting at conception. We assume that we don’t build or we don’t establish emotions until like the baby comes out, right? No, from conception.

We are picking up all of the emotions of everyone around us and specifically the emotions of the person who is carrying us. And so, you know, we can live life seemingly great, right? Like, you know, we have a trust fund and all the other things, but we’re unhappy in the inside and there’s no rhyme or reason to it.

Maybe your mother was depressed when she was pregnant with you, right? Maybe she was dealing with some unresolved grief that you then took on. So I think grief is a fascinating thing. It’s like one of those pieces that like I think.

Her last name is Bridges. She wrote this book and it was based on her studying people right at the end of life. And it’s like this, the curve of like the process. This, I think this is where like the cycle or the stages of grief actually came from. Kuber Ross is her last name. And so it talks about like how people transition at the end of life. It could be the same thing, like I said, from a job change to a move to anything.

Nick McGowan (29:09.793)
And not only the the good things happen, etc. But I want to take a step back to being able to name it. There are a lot of people that have a really hard time naming what they’re feeling. They just feel sad. Like, here’s a blanket. I feel angry. There’s a blanket. I feel good. Like how many people like how you doing? I’m good. That’s it. That’s the end of that. That could be easy to just be like, shut up human don’t want to talk to you right now. Like

say less, we’re good. But also being able to just blanket things. But if you can specifically say, feel really sad about this situation, because I felt let down. And I’m, I feel betrayed. Like even be able to get to those sub layers of that. You then just almost naturally find healing within it, because you’re subconscious and your conscious tied together and go, okay, well, you’re naming it.

and then we can put something to it when you do something with it. Instead of just being like, well, I’m naturally just angry. Like, I’m sure you’ve met somebody before like, what the hell is his problem? He’s always angry. So, is anybody gonna do anything? I’m like, we’re just gonna let him be pissed off for the rest of life. And being able to call those things out, but then also being able to see like, this is what works for me. I’m glad that you brought up that things aren’t good or bad, it’s just they are. Because emotions are just literally.

just like waving you down saying, hey, there’s something here. You should look at this. And you probably do something about it, but you do whatever you want. It’s a matter being able look at those things. When you go through the stages of grief, and you just think of those and I kind of work with people about it, it’s probably easy for you to tie back to things that have been grief driven, but also being able to tie the other side of that. So I’m glad that you pointed out the kind of duality of it.

Like you wouldn’t know, we wouldn’t know light if we didn’t have darkness as well. We wouldn’t know dark if we didn’t have light, etc., etc. But when you think of grief, and for people that are actively going through some sort of really difficult and trying time in their life because of grief, and they’re still on their path towards self-mastery, what sort of advice would you give to them that couples along with grief?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (31:06.542)
Mm-hmm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (31:27.18)
Yeah, so a couple layers to that, right? So going through my process, what I had to first be able to do is one, acknowledge that I had this full spectrum of emotions, right? Because I was the person, I would say stuff like, it takes so much for me to get angry, right? Like I was literally like,

If somebody did something the empathetic side of me, right? It was just like I rationalize I you know forgive and do all those things meanwhile that anger was there it was just Being suppressed heavily heavily suppressed So one acknowledging that I have the full spectrum of feelings Second layer second stage was naming it to your point, right? So being able to say okay right now in this moment

Nick McGowan (32:05.121)
Mmm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (32:21.566)
I feel angry. Okay, why? Right? So there’s this process in Six Sigma world that I learned in corporate, the five whys. And so like, whatever it is, like you just keep asking why.

Nick McGowan (32:36.033)
I’m

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (32:36.194)
you keep asking why until you get to the core of the thing, right? So I feel angry. And sometimes most of the time we’re gonna say angry, mad, sad, happy, right? Like joy, basic ones. But what I love about that book is she has an entire, I don’t know what you call it, appendix section with like every feeling and emotion. What you would consider like the not so good ones and then what are the opposites. So if you really want to

Understand the full spectrum of the emotions that we as humans have. definitely recommend that book Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. So

Nick McGowan (33:12.187)
yeah.

Nice.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (33:15.806)
One, you get to the core of like, okay, I feel angry. Why do I feel angry? Because they cut me off in traffic. Okay, well, why did that make you angry? Because that means that they don’t, you know, that they don’t value my time. Okay, well, why does that make you feel angry? Well, you know, I’m important to right, like you do the work of getting down to the root of what you feel. And oftentimes, it’s going to go back down to three things. I’m not enough.

I’m not worthy or something’s not available to me, right? Those are the core wounds that we have. I’m not enough, I’m not worthy and something’s not available to me, which still falls under the I’m not worthy. And that takes a lot of courage and honesty to be able to get to that point where you realize that, I’m not angry because I got cut off or whatever X is being, it’s them cutting me off.

Nick McGowan (33:50.305)
You

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (34:13.928)
triggered my I’m not enough wound or I’m not worthy wound, right? So that’s that was the second layer of getting honest about myself of you know, those initial wounds. Then the next step was, okay, now you got to feel it. Right? Because you don’t get to right, you don’t get to I’m not worthy. And it’s just like, okay, well, great. That was a great discovery. Let’s go on about the day. Yeah.

Nick McGowan (34:31.701)
all of it.

Nick McGowan (34:38.241)
Sure. Moving along.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (34:43.598)
you’re not worthy? That’s heavy. That’s deep. That’s hard. When did you first realize you didn’t feel worthy? What were those experiences that led to that? Right? And allowing it to drum up all of those memories, maybe even the things that were repressed. And sometimes, and I know you like to talk about trauma.

You know, sometimes the trauma isn’t the things that happened, right? Like the overt things that happened. It could be the things that we never got or the things that were never said. Right? Like if you are a really emotional child and like your parents were emotionally immature and couldn’t be there for you, but they still provided, they still did all the things. Right. You still, that’s still trauma. Right?

Nick McGowan (35:31.275)
Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (35:32.512)
And so you get to feel all of that and get back to the root of all those pieces. And then from there, you decide, okay, knowing what I know now, okay, I know I felt angry, I wanna feel joy.

how do I get into that space of joy? And that’s a process of, okay, well, what do you do? Like, when was the last time you were joyful? How can you think back? Sometimes it’s just thinking back to a memory of when we were like in that state of joy or we were happy or whatever the thing is being. And it doesn’t mean you’re gonna get to joy just because you think about it, but you can go from the spectrum of angry to frustrated.

Right? As long as you can move up the spectrum, that matters. So I wanted to share that in terms of like the process of identifying an emotion and moving through so that you can actually move it, release it, and then not even reframe it, but like create the next set of emotions that you want. When it comes to grief, I think it’s still the same thing. There’s the obvious grief when you lose something, right? Like you’ve lost something.

But if you’re three years out from having lost something or having experienced something and you’re still feeling the emotions as strong and as like, you know, as you did when it first happened, then that means that you’re not feeling grief for that particular situation that you may think it is. That is grief that is underneath something. And so that may, that may have been the catalyst to bring it up.

But that’s an opportunity to really dig deep and say, and I’m not saying that like if you lose someone like in three years, like that’s your expiration date, get over it by no means, by no means. But we do know that after a period of time, especially when we’re in the healing path, we start to perceive the situation differently, right? We start to look beyond what we lost to all the memories we had or the impact the person had in our lives or the gift that it was. If you’re not able to

Nick McGowan (37:15.905)
Sure. Yeah.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (37:38.878)
move into that space or if you haven’t been able to move into that space then you have to ask yourself question like okay beyond this what am i really feeling what am i still feeling and is it related to the person that i lost the thing that i lost the change that i made or is it related to something a little deeper

Nick McGowan (37:58.709)
That is all great info and especially to be able to walk through that and to understand those pieces and components to it. think something to add to it as well as to understand about ourselves. Like if you know that you are a very critical thinker, that’s how you just are in the course of life, then you can’t expect yourself to be a different way. You can of course observe those and understand that. But if you understand at your core, this is how I am. And you at least have a guiding light in a sense, because you can go, am I close to this or am I away from it?

what’s actually happening right now and what do you do with that? like you kind of, you at least trigger it in a positive way for me, the driving, because I hate when people are in front of me most often, just in general. And we live in the mountains and there’s like a major road through and sometimes somebody who seems to be 90 years old, going about 15 under the speed limit when I tend to go 30 over, I’m like, what the fuck are you doing? But if you understand,

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (38:44.226)
same.

Nick McGowan (38:59.105)
about yourself, you can actually laugh at yourself. Like there are times I’m cracking up to myself because I’m like, I’m so damn impatient. Why is this? This old lady didn’t do this in spite of me. She has no idea I’m even around. And then you’re able to look and go, well, I really hope she’s okay. Can she drive and you drive past and she’s like, holding on. You’re like, I hope she’s good. Should I dial 911 and just wait for her, you know? But understanding how we are at our core, then we can understand what do we do with that information? What do we do with the grief?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (39:10.99)
Mm-hmm.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (39:16.565)
You

Nick McGowan (39:28.501)
How do we move through that? What does that look like? And I love that you’ve been able to point out what that full process looks like and how that it’s not just the black and white colors. Like if we looked at like, I haven’t seen the exact thing that you’re talking about, but I’ve seen different versions of it. And it’s like looking at a rainbow scale. You know, there’s just all these different hues and colors of all the different variations of emotions. And if you think about even

as best you can what you experience each day, you’re probably still only gonna, you know, check off a handful of those colors where you experience all of it. Almost every single day, sometimes even in one drive, you know, just like this fucking person, look at that thing, you know, whatever. But I really appreciate that you’ve gotten into everything you’ve gotten into. I appreciate you being on today. And before I let you go, where can people find you and where can they connect?

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (40:23.51)
question. So I can be found at SabineGideon.com and it’s Sabine Gideon on LinkedIn and Instagram. Those are the two places that I hang out the most.

Nick McGowan (40:34.943)
Awesome. And thanks again for being on with us today.

Sabine Gedeon, PCC (40:38.412)
Thank you, Nick McGowan .

https://youtu.be/eBjqD7CtK60

174 episodes