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EP 5: Lisa De Nicola on The Hidden Patterns Linking Love, Work, And Self
Manage episode 523632720 series 3699596
Episode — The Real Story Beneath Your Relationships
with Lisa De Nicola
What if the relationships you’re struggling with aren’t the problem, but the old patterns running beneath them?
In this episode of The Underlayer, leadership and executive coach Lisa De Nicola takes us below the surface to uncover how childhood strategies shape the way we speak up at work, choose partners, maintain friendships, and set boundaries, and how rewriting those strategies starts with small, honest shifts.
What begins as a conversation about relationships becomes a blueprint for reclaiming your voice, your energy, and the parts of yourself you’ve hidden to stay safe.
You’ll hear:
• The moment two mentors reflected a buried childhood wound back to Lisa, and how that realization reshaped every relationship in her life
• How trauma-informed therapy and spiritual guidance accelerated her healing and restored emotional expression as a leadership superpower
• Why “success” in relationships has nothing to do with years together, and everything to do with authenticity, growth, and energy
• How curiosity can resuscitate long-term relationships that have fallen into assumptions and stale stories
• Practical tools to navigate conflict in real time: ask for the hour you need to regulate, name your emotions clearly, and stop expecting people to read your mind
• How small, honest steps prevent the quiet resentments that erode teams, partnerships, and friendships alike
By the end, you’ll understand why healing happens both alone and in partnership, why your patterns are not your identity, and how changing tiny relational habits can transform your confidence at work and at home.
🎧 The Underlayer — Where the Real Story Lives.
If this resonated, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help more people start their own underlayer work.
Lisa's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisadenicola25/
Lisa's Website: https://lisadenicola.com/
The Underlayer YouTube Channel: www.youtube.com/@the_under_layer
The Underlayer Podcast Website: https://www.theunderlayerpodcast.com/
David's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/david-young-mba-indy/
Chapters
1. Setting The Stage: The Underlayer (00:00:00)
2. Meet Lisa: Coaching And Connection (00:01:31)
3. One Self In Every Relationship (00:02:55)
4. Tracing Patterns Back To Childhood (00:04:42)
5. The Crisis That Sparked Healing (00:06:35)
6. Mentors, Intuition, And Revelation (00:09:18)
7. Trauma-Informed Therapy And Growth (00:12:16)
8. No Finish Line For Inner Work (00:15:18)
9. Healing Alone And With Others (00:18:10)
10. Practicing Emotional Expression (00:21:05)
11. Mind Reading Myths At Work And Home (00:24:03)
12. Curiosity Over Assumption (00:26:45)
13. Rethinking Success Beyond Longevity (00:28:36)
14. Masks, Authenticity, And Energy (00:32:02)
15. Owning Your Space And Values (00:35:08)
16. Corporate Authenticity Friction (00:38:08)
17. Micro Steps For Real Change (00:41:35)
18. Energy Checks And Boundaries (00:45:12)
19. Closing Reflections And Where To Find Lisa (00:48:10)
7 episodes
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