101: What does a Secure person do đ§đźââď¸ when an Avoidant Pulls away
Manage episode 520329241 series 3618577
đ¤ ON SALE: How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in 4 Steps
(With Your Avoidant Partner)
https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse
đ¤ ON SALE: How to STOP needing so much reassurance via text
(because safety comes from within, and you chasing or not settling boundary is the thing that give you anxiety, NOT a delayed text.)
https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety
Ever feel like the SECOND your partner pulls away⌠your whole nervous system goes into full panic mode? đ¤â¨
Like one canceled plan⌠one quiet day⌠one shift in tone⌠suddenly feels like the whole relationship is falling apart?
I made this episode for you.
Inside, I walk you through EXACT real-life moments my clients faced â the moments that used to send them into overthinking, people-pleasing, chasing, and feeling ânot enough.â
And then I show you how the secure version of you would handle those exact same moments.
Simple. Calm. Clear. No drama. No chasing. Just grounded self-trust.
Youâll hear:
â
What an anxious person does when someone cancels plans last minute
â
What a secure person does instead â even if it stings
â
How closeness freaks out your nervous system (not them)
â
Why avoidants pull away after intimacy
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How to stop taking every shift personally
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How secure people communicate⌠without fear
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The small, everyday habits that turn anxious attachment into earned secure attachment
This isnât a lecture.
Itâs literally the blueprint to becoming the secure version of you... the version who doesnât panic, doesnât chase, doesnât assume the worst⌠and doesnât lose herself just because someone else needs space.
Weâll dive into:
â The FACTS vs. the stories your anxious brain makes up
â Why your body reacts like danger is coming (even when itâs not)
â How to soothe the panic BEFORE you text
â How to respond like someone who trusts themselves
â How to stop abandoning yourself when someone pulls back
And Iâll walk you through my 4R Method... the exact steps that helped me go from anxious and terrified of being left⌠to fully grounded and secure in myself and my relationship.
If youâre tired of feeling on edge, tired of overthinking the smallest things, tired of feeling like your partnerâs mood controls your whole dayâŚ
This episode will feel like a deep breath.
Like someone holding your hand and saying,
âHey⌠youâre not crazy. Youâre just scared. And hereâs how we fix it.â đ¤â¨
Listen in and tell me which âanxious vs. secureâ moment hit home for you.
FREE 3min Attachment Style QUIZ
https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz
1:1 Coaching Offers (via video calls or whatsapp)
Free Find your ANXIOUS Archetype NOW (to feel calmer)
Free: Anxious to Secure Checklist
https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/anxioustosecurechecklist
CHAPTERS:
00:00 What does a Secure person do when an Avoidant Pulls away
02:52 âś SCENARIO 1: They cancel plans last minute
09:24 âś SCENARIO 2: They go quiet after an intimate weekend
15:44 âś SCENARIO 3: Theyâre distant during a hard week
19:05 âś SCENARIO 4: The Long-Term Pull-Away Avoidant
26:00 Whatâs REALLY Going On?
29:43 What To Do Instead
DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor.
This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions.
This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.
Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.
103 episodes