Series 5: Borderline in Wonderland - Emotions like storms. Love like fire. A heart that’s too big for this tiny teacup world.

E84: The Vanishing Hat: When You Ghost First to Avoid Being Ghosted

In this episode of Borderline in Wonderland, we follow the flicker of the Vanishing Hat—the part of us that disappears before anyone else can leave.

“The Vanishing Hat” dives into the emotional reflex to ghost others first, not out of indifference, but from a deep fear of rejection and abandonment.

With Wonderland’s surreal charm, we explore the quiet panic that hits when someone feels too close or not close enough, and how BPD can push us to vanish without warning—just to protect ourselves from being hurt.

This episode looks at the heartbreaking logic behind pulling away before we’re pushed, and the loneliness that follows when we leave before someone gets the chance to love us fully.

If you’ve ever hit “send” and disappeared… or watched yourself walk away from something you wanted just because the waiting hurt too much—this episode speaks directly to that tender, hidden place.