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Why Are Victims Expected to Do All the Work?

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Manage episode 519868988 series 3476843
Content provided by Patrick Teahan. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Patrick Teahan or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

This episode tells the story of Thomas, a survivor who went no contact with his abusive father after a public meltdown at his wedding, and how the world around him quietly blames him for the relationship he didn’t break.

From well-meaning coworkers saying “all families have stuff,” to relatives insisting “you’ll have to let it go,” Patrick explores why the burden to forgive and reconnect so often falls on the person who was hurt, not the person who caused the harm.

Learn how survivors like Thomas are pressured to “be the bigger person,” while abusers avoid accountability, and how to stop carrying that emotional labor yourself.

Topics include:

  • Why abusive parents are rarely held accountable
  • How relatives and in-laws minimize harm to “keep the peace”
  • The shame, guilt, and invisibility survivors feel when going no contact
  • The hidden motives behind advice like “just forgive”
  • How to flip the script and protect your peace

If you’ve ever been told to reconcile with someone who never took responsibility for the pain they caused, this episode offers validation, and a new way forward.

Keywords: family estrangement, toxic parents, no contact healing, emotional abuse recovery, accountability, narcissistic parent, trauma recovery, boundaries, forgiveness pressure, inner child healing

Nearly 16M kids have lost grocery benefits.
Help them get the meals they need!

Join the Monthly Healing Community Membership

  continue reading

40 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 
Manage episode 519868988 series 3476843
Content provided by Patrick Teahan. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Patrick Teahan or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

This episode tells the story of Thomas, a survivor who went no contact with his abusive father after a public meltdown at his wedding, and how the world around him quietly blames him for the relationship he didn’t break.

From well-meaning coworkers saying “all families have stuff,” to relatives insisting “you’ll have to let it go,” Patrick explores why the burden to forgive and reconnect so often falls on the person who was hurt, not the person who caused the harm.

Learn how survivors like Thomas are pressured to “be the bigger person,” while abusers avoid accountability, and how to stop carrying that emotional labor yourself.

Topics include:

  • Why abusive parents are rarely held accountable
  • How relatives and in-laws minimize harm to “keep the peace”
  • The shame, guilt, and invisibility survivors feel when going no contact
  • The hidden motives behind advice like “just forgive”
  • How to flip the script and protect your peace

If you’ve ever been told to reconcile with someone who never took responsibility for the pain they caused, this episode offers validation, and a new way forward.

Keywords: family estrangement, toxic parents, no contact healing, emotional abuse recovery, accountability, narcissistic parent, trauma recovery, boundaries, forgiveness pressure, inner child healing

Nearly 16M kids have lost grocery benefits.
Help them get the meals they need!

Join the Monthly Healing Community Membership

  continue reading

40 episodes

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