The recording begins with confusion over who’s actually speaking—Dave has stepped away to rescue yet another burned pot of porridge, leaving the conversation in the hands of Hat Guy. What follows is an increasingly unhelpful brainstorming session about Post-it notes. Dave has been scattering them across fields, hoping the mysterious “Dropbox guy” might deliver peanuts. Suggestions arise that maybe, instead of begging for legumes, they could use the notes to ask where they actually are. Caleb is promptly assigned to line up the stickies into a giant field-wide message.

From there, matters only worsen. The townsfolk proudly explain their method of bottling water in the well itself, forcing anyone thirsty to rappel forty feet down. A basket-and-rope system is dismissed outright as too complicated. The sheds of Bootstuck also come under discussion: there’s the “two by four” shed (literally two feet by four feet), the massive hangar-like shed, and, of course, the “shed shed”—a shed specifically designed to store other sheds, mostly to keep the squirrels out.

By the end of the tape, the documenteur audibly falters, questioning the point of it all. The patience that once carried him through tales of waving systems and porridge disasters is beginning to fray. Bootstuck, it seems, is not just an archive of absurdity—it’s a test of endurance.

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