Ep219. When Your Identity and Reality Don’t Match — A Lesson in Embarrassment and Surrender.
Manage episode 512548616 series 2968181
In this episode, Mike gets brutally honest about the current season of life and business — and what it feels like when things aren’t clicking like they used to. With vulnerable reflection and zero ego protection, he shares how embarrassment surfaced, what it revealed about identity, and why surrendering to reality is the path to true peace. If you’ve ever been caught between who you thought you were and what life is actually showing you… this one’s for you.
Key Takeaways
- Teach From Messiness, Not Mastery
Real leadership is built in honesty. Vulnerability liberates the teacher and the listener. - Embarrassment Is a Signal — Not a Shame
When you feel embarrassment, it's pointing to a false identity you’ve been clinging to. - Identity Is Not Reality
Building a self-concept around outcomes is a trap — especially when those outcomes change. - There Is No Winning a War With the Present Moment
Resistance creates suffering. Surrender creates peace, joy, and integrity. - You Don’t Need It to Be Bigger — You Need It to Be Real
The soul doesn’t want quantity. It wants honesty, alignment, and service.
Notable Quotes
- “You know, I like to say that I teach from messiness, not mastery.”
- “Embarrassment is this disconnect between your reality and your identity.”
- “In a battle between identity and reality, we can either keep doubling and tripling down on trying to make reality look like this identity we’ve built… or we get to let go of the identity.”
- “There’s a saying that a truly humble human being cannot be embarrassed.”
- “Please understand, at this point, I don’t have everything figured out — and that’s why I teach from messiness and not mastery.”
Call to Action
🧘♂️ Monkify Your Money Game — 5-Week Nervous System Training
Live virtual intensive — Already in motion, but you can still join.
Join the experience by clicking here!
📘 Inner World, Outer World — The Book
Amazon bestseller. Life-changer. Straight talk on nervous system and soul.
Order your copy here!
🎤 Gateway to Freedom — Mike’s Speaking Event this weekend!
Mike closes out the event with truth, fire, and nervous system liberation. Check out the details here!
Music Credit: "What's Left of Me" by Wes Hoffman & Friends
My Social Media:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mikekitko
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mike_kitko
Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mikekitko
Subscribe to my YouTube: / @mikekitko
Mike Kitko is an executive self-mastery coach, speaker and author. He found external success through powerful titles, incomes, and material possessions. He ultimately fell into depression, toxic abuse of alcohol, and the near collapse of his family before he began a journey of interna
Chapters
1. Teaching From Messiness, Not Mastery (00:00:00)
2. Why Vulnerability Builds Trust (00:03:34)
3. Past Momentum And Easy Growth (00:05:19)
4. Entering A New, Slower Season (00:07:34)
5. Low Registrations And Embarrassment (00:09:54)
6. Identity Versus Present Reality (00:12:24)
7. Surrender, Presence, And Resistance (00:15:14)
8. Nervous System, Shame, And Integrity (00:18:44)
9. Commitment To Teach Whoever Shows Up (00:21:44)
221 episodes