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Fear is a Lack of Mental Discipline: The Fear-Faith Connection in Supporting Loved Ones with Addiction

In this "Get Unhooked Podcast" episode, Jason Coombs (Brick House Recovery) discusses Chapter 11 of "UNHOOKED" – the Hope chapter. He explores establishing boundaries, effective communication, and transforming struggles into service opportunities.

Key Moments

• 2:26 "Fear is lack of mental discipline" - Mental choices precede emotional responses
• 6:10 "Empathy isn't empathy without boundaries" - Proper boundaries bring hearts closer
• 8:03 Faith vs. fear - Challenges refine us "like a rolling stone down the river"
• 10:08 Service as path out of fear - Helping others alleviates obsessive thinking
• 13:03 "True recovery is identity change" not just abstinence
• 19:03 Two categories of fear - Not getting what we want; losing what we have
• 29:04 Testimony - Service transforms self-obsession into purpose
• 32:14 Recovery coach certification opportunities

Mental Discipline: Foundation for Change

Jason establishes that managing addiction – whether our own or supporting others – begins with mental choices, not emotional reactions. "Every day, what I have control over is how I choose to view any situation," he emphasizes.

Three Guiding Principles

• Boundaries enhance empathy – Referencing Brené Brown, Jason shows how boundaries actually bring hearts closer
• Faith as mental discipline – Contrasting faith (cultivated mindset) with fear (default state)
• Service as freedom – Serving others provides the fastest path out of fear

Identity Change: The "Sober Secret"

True recovery requires identity transformation beyond abstinence. "A lot of people can get sober, but the true recovery is identity change," Jason explains, sharing his transition from seeing himself as a failure to recognizing his qualification to help others.

Understanding this distinction helps family members better support the whole-person transformation essential for lasting change.

Understanding Fear

Jason identifies two core fear categories that drive anxiety around addiction:

1. Fear of not getting what we want
2. Fear of losing what we have

Service: The Antidote

Participants share how serving others transformed their journeys. One notes: "Serving with other struggling parents has made such a difference. All my things about myself get lost in being of service."

Actionable Takeaways

• Pause before responding emotionally
• Establish empathy-enhancing boundaries
• Identify your loved one's stage of change before communicating
• Distinguish between sobriety and recovery
• Find service opportunities to escape fear
• Join recovery communities for shared strength

Resources

• Get Unhooked podcast on major platforms
• "Unhooked" book (Audible, Amazon, Jason's website)
• Eight-week Get Unhooked family course
• Recovery coach certification paths
• Brick House Recovery services

Jason concludes with gratitude for the community, acknowledging that transformation occurs through connection with others and a higher power.

For more res

Register for Live UNHOOKED to reclaim your clarity, your strength, and your sanity starting today!

JOIN the next FREE Webclass at liveunhooked.com
For more information on treatment services, check out brickhouserecovery.com