Today I’m talking with writer and memoirist Nefertiti Austin about her journey parenting a neurodivergent child and the many realizations that come with it, which she writes about in her new book, She’s Just Spirited: Parenting a Neurodivergent Child and the Diagnosis That Changes Everything, continues that deeply honest exploration, this time through the lens of raising a differently wired child. In our conversation, Nefertiti shares the challenges and gifts of navigating labels, the role of educators in her family’s story, and the ways adoption has shaped her parenting experience. We also talk about what it means to adapt as parents—to let go of old visions and dream new dreams that embrace our children’s unique paths.

About Nefertiti Austin

Nefertiti Austin is a writer and memoirist. She wrote about the erasure of diverse voices in motherhood in the critically acclaimed Motherhood So White: A Memoir of Race, Gender and Parenting in America (2019) and her work has appeared in the New York Times, Washington Post, Huffington Post, The Nation, Romper, Parents Magazine, and many other publications. She was the subject of an article on race and adoption in The Atlantic and appeared on numerous shows, podcasts, and radio programs, including The Today Show and multiple NPR outlets. Her newest book is She’s Just Spirited: Parenting a Neurodivergent Child and the Diagnosis That Changes Everything (2025). Nefertiti is the proud adoptive mother of two children and lives in Los Angeles.

Things you'll learn from this episode

• How Nefertiti’s parenting journey began through adoption and was reshaped by raising a neurodivergent child

• Why using positive terms like “spirited” instead of negative labels protects children’s sense of self, especially for children of color

• How adoption adds unique layers of complexity to parenting neurodivergent kids and challenges assumptions about nurture

• Why seeking assessments requires patience, persistence, and deep understanding from both parents and educators

• How parents can move toward acceptance by dreaming new dreams for their children while navigating overwhelm and trial and error

• Why bridging the gap between parents and educators is key to creating supportive environments for neurodivergent kids

Resources mentioned

• Nefertiti Austin’s website

• She’s Just Spirited: Parenting a Neurodivergent Child and the Diagnosis That Changes Everything by Nefertiti Austin

• Motherhood So White: A Memoir of Race, Gender and Parenting in America by Nefertiti Austin

• Nefertiti on Instagram

• Nefertiti on Facebook

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