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Cultivating Self-Acceptance with Teru Nakashima

• What is self-acceptance, and why is it important?
• Teru Nakashima describes self-acceptance as the "trunk" within us – the strength to accept ourselves, flaws and all. A strong sense of self-acceptance allows us to remain steady and resilient in the face of life's challenges. It is fundamental to building self-esteem, managing difficult emotions, and forming healthier relationships with ourselves and others.
• What is the '10 Minutes of Looking at Myself' exercise, and how does it help with self-acceptance?
• This exercise involves spending 10 minutes each morning looking at yourself in the mirror with kindness and acceptance, as you would look at a dear friend. Rather than focusing on self-criticism, the goal is to simply observe your expressions and acknowledge any features or aspects you might usually judge, accepting them as parts of yourself. This practice gradually fosters a more compassionate and accepting view of oneself.
• Can you explain the 'Imperfection Notebook' exercise and its purpose?
• The 'Imperfection Notebook' involves writing down daily mistakes or instances where you feel you fell short. Crucially, each entry must be followed by a message of self-compassion, such as "Even though I stumbled during the presentation, I still managed to finish it – that’s something to be proud of." This exercise reframes imperfections as valuable parts of the self and helps to normalize and accept failures.
• What is the 'Color of Emotions Diary,' and how does it promote self-acceptance?
• The 'Color of Emotions Diary' involves associating colors with specific emotions you experience each day. For example, anger might be red, sadness blue, and joy yellow. By labeling each color (and thus each emotion) with "This is a part of me," the diary helps to integrate and accept all emotions, both positive and negative, as components that contribute to the unique "rainbow" that is you.
• What is the purpose of the 'Observing My Tree Diary' exercise?
• This exercise involves choosing a tree and observing it regularly over time. Just as the tree goes through seasonal changes, shedding leaves and growing new ones, it illustrates that it is ok to go through different phases or experiences, just like the tree.
• What is the 'Self-Acceptance Letter' and how do you write one?
• The 'Self-Acceptance Letter' involves writing a letter to yourself each week, starting with "Dear Me." The letter should detail the week's events and your feelings, focusing on acceptance rather than criticism. Avoid judgment and instead acknowledge and validate your experiences and emotions. The goal is to affirm your worthiness and accept yourself as you are.
• What if I find it difficult to be kind and accepting of myself?
• Nakashima acknowledges that cultivating self-acceptance can be challenging, particularly when facing one's flaws and weaknesses. It's important to remember that this is a journey and that it's okay to seek support when needed. Be patient with yourself and try to remember you don't need to be perfect, just accept yourself.
• What is the main takeaway message from Teru Nakashima's advice on self-acceptance?
• The core message is to embrace your imperfections and acknowledge your inherent worth. Nakashima encourages you to be gentle with yourself, recognizing that you are doing your best and that the process of growth and change is itself valuable. Self-acceptance is a gradual process, like a tree's trunk slowly thickening, and requires patience, compassion, and a willingness to embrace all aspects of yourself.

Teru Nakashima, All about Self-esteem