This week on Unlikely Friends, we don’t so much ease into the episode as dive head-first into hemorrhoids.

Pauline kicks things off with a typically delicate question: “Do you give your dentist a Christmas present or—fuck that?”

Naturally, this spirals into Emma suggesting Leigh should be gifting his hemorrhoid doctor, and Jill offering a frankly too-vivid description of the situation. From there, the gang take a scenic tour through arseholes in general (because of course they do).

Jade shares the traumatic tale of being stung by a bee — apparently the worst pain he’s ever felt — before the conversation shifts to Christmas, where everyone realises that kids don’t want toys anymore. It’s all iPhones, tablets, and tech… the magic of Action Men and dollhouses is dead. More festive chat follows, including the now-infamous Leigh-Beat-Bunton Christmas ornament.

Pauline then drops another cracker of a question: If someone owed you money, which member of the group would you actually ask for it back from? This sparks some eye-opening revelations about everyone’s spending habits — including the fact that Leigh is far more of a tough nut than anyone expected.

There’s travel talk, too: how being a celebrity changes the way you move through airports, hotels, and life in general.

And finally? A blockbuster discussion: Why don’t we have girl bands and boy bands like the 90s anymore? The friends dive into how music production and financing have changed, and why the era of endless pop groups might truly be over.