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An Apology Without Change is Manipulation

In this raw and relatable episode, the Therapists Unhinged hosts, Robin and Nella, get real about relationships and emotional intelligence (or the lack thereof). They share personal stories and professional insights on navigating the complexities of modern dating, divorce, and the patterns we often repeat. From the dysregulated nervous system that mistakes attachment for love to the importance of self-awareness, they offer a candid conversation that’s more conversational than clinical and packed with wit and wisdom.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• An apology without change is manipulation.
• A lot of people are confused about what is actually real in dating and relationships.
• People who get divorced and jump right back into the dating game are looking for something to fill a void instead of sitting in the loneliness.
• It is not my job to babysit your emotions.
• You can use the three C's from Al-Anon classes (I did not create it, I cannot change it, and I cannot control it) to help in a relationship.
• A person who is constantly talking about themselves is a red flag in a relationship.
• A red flag can be a person who wants to get serious very quickly.
• There's a difference between lust and love.
• If you have a lot of red flags, you're going to get a circus.
BEST MOMENTS:

00:00:28. "We are at episode 1919."
00:02:31. "It was tough because what we have to deal with and how people present themselves in the beginning are not always who they are."
00:05:09. "And the catfishing stuff too, you know, people oh my gosh, I'm catfishing now."
00:08:40. "This is the way I am. Yeah. There are certain things about you and about everybody as an adult that may not change."
00:13:43. "But now it's me pouring into, you know, people who are starting off relationships, no matter if they're young, middle age or old."
00:17:24. "And it won't find you in the broken spaces that the other relationship left you in."
00:21:26. "Yeah, absolutely. Because you do have to know who you are."
00:25:27. "They go through that cycle and and it's sad to hear and to listen, but to understand it, to allow them to understand and dissect where that comes from, a lot of that is, you know, comes from like their childhood and experiences and stuff."
00:32:05. "You're going to sit there and eat it till it's done. Yeah. See, that's traumatizing."
00:37:49. "I had no right then here when you come back, they're telling you exactly who they are 100%."

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Therapists Unhinged is where mental health gets real. Hosted by licensed therapists who tell it like it is, this podcast dives deep into the messy, meaningful, and hilarious parts of being human. From mastering resilience to navigating the chaos of everyday life, we bring raw conversations, expert insights, and unfiltered honesty...no jargon, no BS.

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