Ep #90 - Choose Your Meaning, Change Your Marriage with Naomi Stonier
Manage episode 519090441 series 3552697
What if the way you interpret things is the lever that changes everything at home? In this lighthearted conversation with relationship coach Naomi Stonier, we unpack how choosing your meaning—moment by moment—can shift a marriage from tense and reactive to grounded and loving. Naomi shares her own story (including nine rounds of IVF) and how doing the work herself changed the dynamic for everyone around her.
We dig into:
- Influence vs control — you can’t control your partner, but you can influence the relationship when you lead with love, not judgement.
- The emotional pause — noticing big feelings without letting them drive the bus; responding instead of reacting.
- Stable ambiguity — why staying stuck feels “safer” and how to choose your discomfort to create real change.
- Get specific about needs — e.g. “more hugs”, and dropping unhelpful “rules” that make love harder to receive.
- One person can shift a couple — go first, and let the data of your results guide the next step.
- Coaching vs therapy — why coaching can fast-track the lessons so they compound for life.
Questions we keep coming back to:
- What am I finding difficult? What do I need? What do I want?
- What would love do here? (and yes, sometimes love says “no”).
If you’re a busy, big-hearted woman juggling work, family and the mental load—and you’re done with white-knuckling your way through your relationship—this episode will give you practical, no-fluff tools you can use today.
Connect with Naomi: https://naomistonier.com/ (book a free chat) — she’s also on LinkedIn, YouTube and Facebook.
https://youtube.com/@naomistoniercoaching?si=h92TY1XhpAXWVy5j
https://www.facebook.com/naomi.stonier.7547
https://www.linkedin.com/in/naomi-stonier/
If this helped, please follow, rate and share with a friend who needs a loving nudge. And if you want support applying this in your real life, you can always book a consult with me. Let’s make space for the relationship—and the life—you actually want.
You can also watch this episode on YouTube with Captions - https://www.youtube.com/@TheWorkingWomensLifeCoach
If you'd like to have a chat about how I can help you further, please don't hesitate to click here & book a time with me, I'd love to meet you.
You can also follow me on IG @NickyBevan_LifeCoach
93 episodes