Reclaiming Yourself
Manage episode 521429850 series 2839001
Ever felt that dizzy aftertaste of a conversation where everything somehow becomes your fault? We sit down with coach and mentor Kyle Miller to untangle the confusion around narcissistic abuse, the misuse of the word “narcissist,” and the practical steps that help survivors reclaim clarity, confidence, and peace.
Kyle shares a grounded way to tell patterns apart, focusing on three crucial signals: accountability, empathy, and compassion. From there, we explore how emotional abuse hides in plain sight—not as one dramatic event, but as a string of small, explainable moments that add up to harm. Kyle explains why rumination is the mind’s attempt to make sense of chaos and how validation turns looping thoughts into a coherent story you can finally put down. We also dig into the difference between niceness and kindness, why your downtime counts as a real appointment, and how to build boundaries that protect your energy without isolating you from healthy connection.
For friends watching from the outside, Kyle offers a better approach than “just leave.” You’ll hear why questions beat ultimatums, how intermittent reinforcement keeps people stuck, and what earned trust looks like after you’ve been burned. Along the way, Kyle shares parts of his own journey—how one blunt, caring challenge saved him from a false story about himself—and the coaching practices he uses to help clients move from survival to a life that feels like theirs again.
If you’re sorting through gaslighting, rebuilding self-trust, or trying to support someone you love, this conversation pairs clear definitions with compassionate tools you can use today. Want more of these insights and resources? Subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a review to help others find the show.
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Chapters
1. Welcome & Purpose of the Show (00:00:00)
2. Meet Kyle Miller and His Mission (00:01:27)
3. Why Narcissism Is Everywhere Online (00:02:32)
4. Misuse of the Label and Real Definitions (00:04:23)
5. Traits vs. Intent: Power, Control, and Context (00:06:10)
6. The Big Three: Accountability, Empathy, Compassion (00:07:28)
7. When Abuse Is Invisible: Emotional Patterns (00:09:05)
8. Kyle’s Path to Coaching Survivors (00:12:04)
9. Validation, Rumination, and Making Sense (00:15:10)
10. Practicing Self-Compassion and Awareness (00:18:00)
11. Kindness vs. Niceness and Boundaries (00:21:20)
12. Helping a Friend in a Toxic Relationship (00:24:30)
13. Intermittent Reinforcement and Why People Stay (00:28:10)
14. Kyle’s Services, Resources, and Closing (00:31:20)
138 episodes