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From Casual to Committed. Chapter 9: Planning for the future.

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Manage episode 475850827 series 3582739
Content provided by Alan Cox. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Alan Cox or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

Send us a text

Welcome to ‘Empowering Gay Men the Podcast’.

This is the fifth episode that marks a change from the usual format and indeed a huge move from the focus pf my work. I became an ICF-accredited Life Coach and CBT Practitioner with the aim of working with just gay men and that is what I did.

I specialised in tackling the major issues that affect gay men, particularly those in mid-life, such as internalised homophobia and coming out. I had presumed that those two areas were those that stopped men reaching their true potential.

But the downloads from the episodes didn’t back that up. Instead, the most popular episodes were those that were looking at relationships and how to recover from the breakup of a relationship.

What did that indicate?

Firstly, that gay men were interested in relationships. Media is quite adept at portraying gay men as being more promiscuous than their straight counterparts. Or it highlights things such as ‘throppling’ as a way of showing us in a bad light. Yet, when I carried out research it indicated that there was a huge interest in monogamy.

I started looking at why gay men were interested in a committed relationship and also why many were not able to achieve one. And guess what – internalised homophobia came out as one of the major reasons as well as self-acceptance and a lack of identity. Therefore, all the previous work I had carried out – the writing and more than 61 episodes of this podcast was still valid but needed to be more appropriately channelled.

And that’s what I did. I devised coaching programmes that directly address the way how gay men can overcome the obstacles that deny them their desired outcome – a monogamous relationship. One thing was clear and that was that for gay men to reach a position of achieving a monogamous relationship they had to start by loving themselves first and that wasn’t a gushy ‘Oh bless’ sentiment but a real acceptance of themselves. i But in order to reach that goal, an inner transformation had to take place and this occurs over three different stages:

The struggle – Feeling unfulfilled, stuck to casual dating cycles.

The breakthrough – Understanding yourself; your values and challenging disempowering beliefs.

The transformation – Finding authentic connection and long-term commitment.

So today you will be listening to:

Chapter 9: Planning for the future.
Setting joint goals.
Discussing long-term commitment.
Preparing for life changes together.
Life coaching techniques.

If you want to access the whole book then you will need to buy it via Amazon or Kindle.

I work as an ICF-accredited Life Coach and trained through an organisation called Coaching Masters. If you are also interested in a career in Life Coaching then I would recommend them.

There are referral links in the transcript if you would like to contact them.

https://thecoachingmasters.com/exclusive-masterclass/c/0u4jf

https://thecoachingmasters.com/membership/c/0u4jf

And if you’re interested in developing a podcast then I would recommend Buzzsprout. Why not use the referral code that is in the transcript?

https://www.buzzsprout.com/?referrer_id=2318357

In the meantime, please feel free to contact me on:

[email protected]

Wishing you all the very best.
Alan.

Credits: The music is La Nouvelle Lune by Reveille.

Support the show

  continue reading

61 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 
Manage episode 475850827 series 3582739
Content provided by Alan Cox. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Alan Cox or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

Send us a text

Welcome to ‘Empowering Gay Men the Podcast’.

This is the fifth episode that marks a change from the usual format and indeed a huge move from the focus pf my work. I became an ICF-accredited Life Coach and CBT Practitioner with the aim of working with just gay men and that is what I did.

I specialised in tackling the major issues that affect gay men, particularly those in mid-life, such as internalised homophobia and coming out. I had presumed that those two areas were those that stopped men reaching their true potential.

But the downloads from the episodes didn’t back that up. Instead, the most popular episodes were those that were looking at relationships and how to recover from the breakup of a relationship.

What did that indicate?

Firstly, that gay men were interested in relationships. Media is quite adept at portraying gay men as being more promiscuous than their straight counterparts. Or it highlights things such as ‘throppling’ as a way of showing us in a bad light. Yet, when I carried out research it indicated that there was a huge interest in monogamy.

I started looking at why gay men were interested in a committed relationship and also why many were not able to achieve one. And guess what – internalised homophobia came out as one of the major reasons as well as self-acceptance and a lack of identity. Therefore, all the previous work I had carried out – the writing and more than 61 episodes of this podcast was still valid but needed to be more appropriately channelled.

And that’s what I did. I devised coaching programmes that directly address the way how gay men can overcome the obstacles that deny them their desired outcome – a monogamous relationship. One thing was clear and that was that for gay men to reach a position of achieving a monogamous relationship they had to start by loving themselves first and that wasn’t a gushy ‘Oh bless’ sentiment but a real acceptance of themselves. i But in order to reach that goal, an inner transformation had to take place and this occurs over three different stages:

The struggle – Feeling unfulfilled, stuck to casual dating cycles.

The breakthrough – Understanding yourself; your values and challenging disempowering beliefs.

The transformation – Finding authentic connection and long-term commitment.

So today you will be listening to:

Chapter 9: Planning for the future.
Setting joint goals.
Discussing long-term commitment.
Preparing for life changes together.
Life coaching techniques.

If you want to access the whole book then you will need to buy it via Amazon or Kindle.

I work as an ICF-accredited Life Coach and trained through an organisation called Coaching Masters. If you are also interested in a career in Life Coaching then I would recommend them.

There are referral links in the transcript if you would like to contact them.

https://thecoachingmasters.com/exclusive-masterclass/c/0u4jf

https://thecoachingmasters.com/membership/c/0u4jf

And if you’re interested in developing a podcast then I would recommend Buzzsprout. Why not use the referral code that is in the transcript?

https://www.buzzsprout.com/?referrer_id=2318357

In the meantime, please feel free to contact me on:

[email protected]

Wishing you all the very best.
Alan.

Credits: The music is La Nouvelle Lune by Reveille.

Support the show

  continue reading

61 episodes

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