Chapter 7 of 24

“Just listening is what turns a victim into a survivor.”

– Christine Ristaino

When we ask women who have survived abuse and narcissistic relationships within organized religion what men can do to help the situation, they almost always express a desire for men to listen to their survivor stories. Religion encourages us to study theology, leadership, and growth practices. Unfortunately, survivors’ stories are often overlooked due to the time needed to build relationships and foster effective communication.

Are you serious about deconstruction and asking bigger questions?

If that’s the case, this book was created for you. As a former pastor, I made the mistake of deconstructing a bit and then trying to start something new, as I was trained to do. The problem with that approach is that I wasn’t ready to begin something new.

I hadn’t delved deeply enough or asked enough questions. The first stage of deconstruction typically includes assessing our beliefs regarding hell and the afterlife, supporting queer individuals and women in their fight for equality, and achieving a better understanding of racism and privilege.

Many people in deconstruction communities expend significant effort criticizing Evangelicals and attempting to gain a following. While I believe they deserve intense criticism, this strategy fails to effectively tackle the problem because they generally don’t listen to us!

Our tendency to punish our former organizations sometimes overlooks the challenging process of healing and growth. It is the same trap we fell into in our former associations.

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Campfires occupy a special spot in the mosaic of history. They act as communal hubs across different cultures and faiths. The campfire’s circular design fosters equal participation within the collective group. The flames at the center draw our focus and encourage face-to-face interactions as we exchange experiences, wisdom, and insights about the world beyond. It is where legendary myths and tales are born.

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This book is named Campfires in the Desert as it stems from nearly 400 discussions we held with individuals on our podcast, The Desert Sanctuary, and our aspiration to improve.

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Thanks for considering us, autographed copies are $20

Karl Forehand