This week on The Actual News, we’re back from hiatus and the world hasn’t slowed down. The U.S. is bombing Iranian nuclear sites, Trump is declaring premature ceasefires, and Israel is playing puppet master with American foreign policy. It’s geopolitics as usual—absurd, aggressive, and deeply unserious.

Domestically, Zoran Ani wins the Democratic primary for NYC mayor, and conservatives lose their minds over the rise of a “Muslim socialist.” We break down the panic, the polling, and the patterns behind why progressives keep winning—even when the right swears it’ll be the end of civilization.

From foreign aggression to local elections, it’s another calm, rational episode of easy listening for the end of the world.

“Easy listening for the end of the world. And as usual, we don't mean the end of the world per se, just more so the world as we know it.”

“Obama had a deal with Iran... that we would essentially pay them so that they would not develop nuclear weapons. 'Cause see, we have the nuclear weapons. We don't want other people to have them.”

“Trump came into office and one of the main things that Trump ran on... was that everything Obama did was gay.”

“Conservatives are freaking out... like, ‘Oh my God, it’s a Muslim socialist! You guys remember the other person you said was gonna cause the total collapse of the city? The Latina socialist—Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. And then it didn’t.”

“The money never trickles down. You cut taxes for very wealthy people—shockingly, they don’t give that money to anyone poorer than them.”

“Eric Adams is like openly just texting some Turkish officials like, ‘Yes, let’s do corruption crimes together. I love you.’”

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