Some women hit breaking point and decide to shrink. Kate Baxendale hit hers and chose to expand.

After decades in high-pressure leadership roles across the NHS, juggling responsibility for hundreds of lives and navigating the invisible weight of being “the strong one,” Kate found herself unravelling. Not all at once but slowly, subtly, almost imperceptibly.

She didn’t fall apart in a dramatic collapse. She became quiet. Disconnected. Withdrawn. She started questioning herself. She stopped recognising the person staring back in the mirror. It was only when she stepped back and asked “What do I need?” that everything changed.

In this powerful conversation with Sharni, Kate opens up about menopause, introversion, emotional exhaustion, and what happens when women stop pushing through and finally start listening to themselves.

They talk about the danger of toxic positivity, the myth of resilience, and the cost of being the one who always holds it all together.

But more than anything, this is a story about rediscovering yourself in the middle of a busy, beautiful, chaotic life and learning that you don’t have to choose between success and sanity.

Whether you’re leading a team, holding a family together, or simply trying to stay afloat, this episode will remind you that it’s okay to rest, okay to retreat, and okay to be unapologetically you.

Chapter Breakdown & Timestamps:

[01:28] Setting Boundaries & Protecting Mental Health
Kate discusses personal values and avoiding toxic environments.

[04:04] The Struggles of Friendship & Social Media
How social media impacts friendships and mental health.

[07:09] Introversion & Work – Finding Balance
Navigating leadership roles as an introvert.

[11:02] Emotional Resilience – The Bucket Theory
Managing emotional energy to prevent burnout.

[14:22] Self-Forgiveness & Learning from Mistakes
The role of mistakes in personal growth.

[19:06] Shame vs. Growth – Overcoming Judgment
How shame holds people back from progress.

[24:44] The 1% Rule – Small Steps to Change
Why small daily improvements matter.

[29:55] Toxic Positivity – When Encouragement Hurts
The fine line between support and forced optimism.

[34:20] Menopause & Career – The Silent Struggle
How menopause affects confidence at work.

[41:19] Neurodivergence & Breaking Social Norms
Focusing on strengths over limitations.

[48:52] Social Media – Filters & Self-Worth
The impact of beauty standards online.

[55:00] Final Thoughts – Growth & Moving Forward
Key takeaways on self-awareness and resilience.

Resources & Mentions:

🔗 Hair loss Education From Sharni: https://www.sharniknightonacademy.com

🔗 Connect with Sharni Knighton: https://www.instagram.com/sharni_k_hair?igsh=eGU1YmwwcmdpNTVp

🔗Connect with Tell Her Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tell_her_podcastigsh=Mnlpazd2NWl6OGhn&utm_source=qr