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Confident, But Not Too Confident: When People Only Like It on Their Terms

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Manage episode 498439838 series 3331563
Content provided by Diane O'Canto. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Diane O'Canto or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

In this episode of Tea with D, I unpack the backlash I received from participating in a lighthearted TikTok trend — and how it quickly spiraled into a wave of men attacking my appearance. I was called fake, rated with numbers, asked “how much,” and even told that “time is ticking.” All because I had the nerve to look confident.

But this goes deeper than one video. Since I was a little girl, I never felt seen. I was the “ugly duckling” — overlooked and underestimated. Then in high school, I blossomed… and suddenly people did notice me — but with judgment. I was "slut-shamed". I was made fun of for putting effort into my appearance. I could never win.

For a long time, I lost my sparkle. But today, I feel like I’m finally stepping into who I was always meant to be — confident, joyful, and free. And yet, here we are again: people trying to tear me down for it.

This episode isn’t just about me. It’s for every woman who’s ever been told to be confident, but not too confident. Pretty, but not too pretty. Visible, but not too loud. Let's talk about it.

🔑 Highlights:

  • The viral “decline” trend and the backlash I received
  • What it feels like to be judged for your appearance — no matter what side you’re on
  • My personal journey: from the “ugly duckling” to reclaiming my sparkle
  • The double standard of confidence for women
  • Turning hate into purpose

📌 Reminder:
Confidence isn’t the problem — people’s discomfort with it is. Tune in and let’s sip on that truth.

Interested in following my curated life where I post my adventures?!
Instagram: diane.christine.ocanto

  continue reading

46 episodes

Artwork
iconShare
 
Manage episode 498439838 series 3331563
Content provided by Diane O'Canto. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by Diane O'Canto or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://podcastplayer.com/legal.

In this episode of Tea with D, I unpack the backlash I received from participating in a lighthearted TikTok trend — and how it quickly spiraled into a wave of men attacking my appearance. I was called fake, rated with numbers, asked “how much,” and even told that “time is ticking.” All because I had the nerve to look confident.

But this goes deeper than one video. Since I was a little girl, I never felt seen. I was the “ugly duckling” — overlooked and underestimated. Then in high school, I blossomed… and suddenly people did notice me — but with judgment. I was "slut-shamed". I was made fun of for putting effort into my appearance. I could never win.

For a long time, I lost my sparkle. But today, I feel like I’m finally stepping into who I was always meant to be — confident, joyful, and free. And yet, here we are again: people trying to tear me down for it.

This episode isn’t just about me. It’s for every woman who’s ever been told to be confident, but not too confident. Pretty, but not too pretty. Visible, but not too loud. Let's talk about it.

🔑 Highlights:

  • The viral “decline” trend and the backlash I received
  • What it feels like to be judged for your appearance — no matter what side you’re on
  • My personal journey: from the “ugly duckling” to reclaiming my sparkle
  • The double standard of confidence for women
  • Turning hate into purpose

📌 Reminder:
Confidence isn’t the problem — people’s discomfort with it is. Tune in and let’s sip on that truth.

Interested in following my curated life where I post my adventures?!
Instagram: diane.christine.ocanto

  continue reading

46 episodes

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