114: Child-free Estate Planning: Picking the Right People for Key Roles - and What to do if You are Picked! with Patricia De Fonte

Take Back Retirement

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“Usually, people are not trying to kill you or keep you alive for nefarious reasons, unless you're very old and very rich and very mean.” -Patricia De Fonte

When most people think of estate planning, they imagine dividing assets among children or a spouse—but Patricia De Fonte, founder of De Fonte Law, offers a broader and deeper perspective. Our hosts, Stephanie McCullough and Kevin Gaines, sit down with Patricia to explore what “estate planning with heart” really means, especially for those without children or partners.

People often name child-free individuals as caretakers without their consent, adding invisible burdens. To anybody in this situation, Patricia urges taking ownership: ask questions, know what’s expected, and ensure fair compensation.

Far from dry legal jargon, Patricia’s approach to estate planning is a refreshing blending of emotional realism with practical wisdom. The stories she shares—from hospital disputes to posthumous family rifts—tell us just how crucial it is to name the right people, update our documents, and make our values explicit.

She encourages everyone to assemble a personal and professional support team, use tools like detailed healthcare directives, and even consider gifts for healthcare proxies as acts of compassion.

Plan not just for assets, but for relationships and peace of mind.

Key Topics:

Patricia’s Philosophy on Estate Planning (03:38)
Burden of the Unasked Role (05:11)
The Dangers of Safe Deposit Boxes (07:04)
Healthcare Directives and Family Conflict (08:59)
The Reality of Fiduciary Roles (15:17)
“What do You Mean by Liability?” (32:33)
Updating Documents and Avoiding DIY Pitfalls (39:16)
Stephanie and Kevin’s Wrap-Up (49:43)

Resources:

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