Have you heard of Black Cat Energy? Maybe you’ve seen it on Instagram or TikTok—those catchy videos comparing “black cats” and “golden retrievers” in relationships.
If you found it funny, intriguing, or maybe just a little off, then this episode is for you! We’re diving into this viral trend that’s been dominating social media and asking: what’s really going on here?
In this episode, we discuss the phenomenon of Black Cat Energy, which has recently gone viral in the dating advice space. Black Cat Energy refers to a power dynamic whereby women are encouraged to be the “black cat” in romantic relationships with men rather than being a “golden retriever” - in other words, it encourages women to be the one who is being chased, rather than the one who is chasing.
We discuss: why we think it’s problematic, why it’s not as empowering for women as it’s promoted to be, heteronormativity, white cat energy(!), why women have historically been in an inferior position when it comes to romantic relationships with men, anxious and avoidant attachment styles, and why being chased shouldn’t be the main goal for any relationship.
We also give advice about what we think you should do instead!

If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to follow us and leave a review. And if you have any ideas or topics you’d like us to cover in future episodes, feel free to send us an email—we’d love to hear from you!

Send your stories and inquiries: [email protected]
Follow us on Instagram: shesjustpodcast

Podcast Logo Artwork by Chami (@chami.jpg)

Intro Music: Picture Perfect Gurl by SPARKZ
(The first three episodes: Out Loud by Beat Mekanik (Free Music Archive | CC BY))
Outro Music: 2010 Pop by Akira Sora (Free Music Archive | CC BY)