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Our guest this month shares her journey of having grown up in a household with a mother who "found Jesus". It's taken a few years for Nismah to deconstruct her mother's faith and live her best life. She has a podcast where she interviews people who have gone through the same process called the Escape from Religion.

What is religious deconstruction? It's the process of pulling apart and re-examining one's religious beliefs. It originated in the US around evangelism. Wikipedia tells us that people who deconstruct have described destabilizing feelings of anxiety, guilt, anger, confusion, and fear, as well as curiosity, awe, and liberation. As an open-ended process, the outcome of deconstruction is uncertain.

I think it's a good idea for us to re-examine our beliefs, whether religious or other, so I was really excited to have Nismah on the podcast.

Nismah experienced religion as toxic due to the numerous rules and conditions that she had to follow, that she believes lead to self abandonment. She explains that she finds it hard sometimes to distinguish between religion and cult because where do you draw the line?

We also discussed how sadly religions tend to have an all or nothing approach to their teachings, which is difficult for some people, especially when some of it does not resonate. Nismah describes her deconstruction as a gradual process that culminated one day as she read a passage in the Bible that claimed that women had to be silent, and she had a profound reaction to it, recognising that it did not align with her values. It turns out the rampant homophobic environment she grew up in was the last nail on the coffin, as Nismah discovered she was gay.