In this episode, Allen and Torri explore why forgiveness is at the heart of our spiritual journey, not only as a biblical command but as a practice that brings freedom and growth—both in our relationships and within ourselves.
Key Takeaways:
- Forgiveness Is a Command:
Forgiving others—and ourselves—isn’t optional for believers. The Bible teaches (Matthew 6:14-15) that we are required to forgive, and withholding it blocks our own spiritual well-being and growth.
- The F.R.E.S.H. Approach:
Allen and Torri break forgiveness into five steps using FRESH:
- F: Forgive—Obey God’s call to forgive, even when it’s difficult.
- R: Reflect—Examine your heart for mistakes or bitterness, but do so for growth, not shame.
- E: Embrace Grace—Accept God’s grace for yourself and be willing to offer that same grace to others.
- S: Self-Control—Let go of resentment and refuse to retaliate.
- H: Heavenly Perspective—Keep God’s bigger eternal picture in view, not just your temporary hurt.
- Forgive Others and Yourself:
True forgiveness is about more than letting others off the hook—it’s about extending grace to ourselves as well. Holding onto guilt or self-condemnation can be as damaging as refusing to forgive others. Like the Apostle Paul, who was radically transformed by Christ’s grace, we are all invited to become new by letting go of our past and embracing God’s mercy.
- Being an Example:
Our attitudes and actions are always influencing others. Showing forgiveness—even in hard situations—demonstrates Christ’s love to those around us, sometimes more loudly than words ever could.
- Restoring Broken Relationships:
Forgiveness can repair and strengthen relationships. Jesus restored Peter after his betrayal—teaching us that reconciliation and new beginnings are possible, even after deep wounds.
- Breaking Hurtful Cycles:
Unforgiveness can keep us stuck in cycles of pain and retaliation. By choosing forgiveness, we break these destructive patterns and invite peace into our lives and communities.
- Don’t “Fake It Till You Make It”:
The episode warns that forced or phony forgiveness isn’t biblical or healthy. True forgiveness, from the heart, is only possible through the help of God’s Spirit.
- Scriptural Foundation:
The conversation is grounded in scripture—Matthew 6, Colossians 3, and Romans 12—pointing out that forgiveness reflects God’s own heart and character.
- Freedom and Growth:
Allen and Torri compare unforgiveness to living in “limp mode”—moving through life wounded and weighed down. Real forgiveness lifts that burden, allowing us to become healthier, more whole, and better equipped to support others.
- Practical Steps:
- Reflect: Ask God to show you any lingering unforgiveness in your heart.
- Pray: Invite God’s healing and let His word take root in your life.
- Act: Decide to release bitterness, embrace God’s grace, and make room for growth and peace.
Closing Thought:
Forgiveness is not about dismissing pain or pretending injustice didn’t happen. It’s about allowing God to heal us, transform our relationships, and lead us into true freedom. Forgiveness is foundational for anyone longing for spiritual health, deeper connection, and lasting peace—with God, others, and themselves.