Ep 107: What Does RAD Look Like at School?

Regulated & Relational

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29d ago 50:12

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This is a follow-up to Episode 101, where we discussed the two recognized attachment disorder diagnoses and their impact on families. In this episode, we focus on how RAD shows up at school—and what teachers, counselors, and administrators need to know to respond with understanding and effectiveness.

Educator Takeaways

• Stay curious, not reactive. RAD behaviors are about survival, not defiance.

• Don’t take it personally. Regulation is contagious—yours can help calm theirs.

• Drop the rope. Avoid engaging in power struggles; instead, step back and stay grounded.

• Connect the adults. Prevent triangulation by keeping clear, direct communication among parents, teachers, and administrators.

• Prioritize safety and consistency. Predictable routines and transparent expectations create a sense of security.

• Support attachment without replacing it. Teachers can be caring and relational without taking on the role of primary attachment figure.

What Doesn’t Work

• Rewards and punishments as motivators

• Multiple warnings or lectures

• Asking “why” after behaviors

• Emotional reactivity from adults

What Does Work

• Calm, consistent follow-through

• Pre-planned responses for known triggers

• Structured routines and visual schedules

• Providing regulated choices

• Team-based collaboration with parents and specialists

• Focusing on regulation first, learning second

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