Barrie Craig, Confidential Investigator - The Thirteenth Guest

Old Time Radio Mysteries

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4d ago 28:32

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Barrie is invited to an fancy, exclusive dinner party by a man named Badger Boris, the type of guy that is frequently the subject of high society newspaper columns. Boris presents Barrie's invitation personally. He says "Mr. Craig, you will of course be paid handsomely". Barrie says "Paid yet for coming to your big blowouts. Now I'm really overwhelmed". Boris says "Then you agree to come?" Barrie says "After you give me the other inducements". Boris says "Well, there will be fine foods there, I've ordered two hundred pounds of buffalo steak". Barrie says "What do i wash it down with?" Boris says "A special beverage that I had flown here from Istanbul". Barrie asks "What's for dessert?" Boris says "Raisin cake, a plebeian touch to offset the noxious effects of a too rich repast". Barrie asks "How prosperous will I be going home in the early AM?" Boris says "Your fee will be one thousand dollars". Barrie asks "Money flown in from Istanbul? Boris says "Oh no, American money". Barrie says "I'm your slave. Sketch out the requirements of my assignment". Boris says "Now, I'm giving an intimate costume party for certain selected friends. A masquerade, you understand? You perhaps read about other famous parties I've given in the past?" Barrie says "Who hasn't? Your parties generally make the front pages, and the police plotter. Your parties, they always break up in bloody brawls". Boris says "You are unfortunately accurate. You will circulate with the guests and when you sense that any of them are becoming too disputatious, too heated up, you will then exercise a tranquilizing influence". Barrie asks "Exactly, what do I do there?" Boris says "Well, a blow shrewdly delivered to the stomach, say where the damage cannot be seen. i don't want a lawsuit against me". Barrie asks "Where do I put the horizontal guest after I stiffen it?" Boris says "I have an emergency room set aside. You'll find bandages, smelling salt, and restoratives in it". Barrie says "Now, that's my job, a bouncer with kid gloves". Boris says "And a tuxedo. You must wear a tuxedo and a mask."

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