In the tumultuous change of midlife, it makes perfect sense that at times, we’ll feel lost. Often a loss of a sense of self - of who we are. And with that, the confidence to dress in a way that feels authentic.

Erica has had times when she looks in the mirror and the image of the person looking back at her feels…well…rather alien. We talked about this in a previous episode here in Midlife Unfiltered. In that episode we both exclaimed that we needed to get Fiona Keary on the poddie to shed some light on what’s going on and more importantly, how we can reclaim who we are in how we dress…our personal style.

And she didn’t disappoint. Fiona knows her stuff. Seriously knows her stuff. Through her business, Style Liberation she’s helped 1000’s of women from all around the globe, reclaim their personal style. To feel more like themselves again and the freedom that brings.

Below are some highlights of that fabulous chat where she shares what many of her clients’ concerns are when it comes to their personal style. Fiona also openly shares smokin’ hot tips on how to do this, reassuring us that we all can. Smashing some commonly held myths and misconceptions. Yes! We love that.

Scroll through and you’ll find links of where you can connect with Fiona and a quiz to get you started on your journey to reclaiming your personal style.

Thanks Fiona. You’re a star and we so appreciate your wisdom, knowledge and time.

Anita & Erica xx

Common Concerns

Through the countless conversations Fiona has had with women in midlife, a common struggle is not feeling like their external appearance sits comfortably with their internal identity - who they are. And they’re not sure how to fix that.

“I don’t know how to dress in a way that feels true to who I am.”

She calls this common conflict the Alien Effect. I’m sure many of us have items in our wardrobe that when we put them on, feel ‘alien’ to us.

Myth Busted: The main issue isn’t actually about the fit of that item —it’s about understanding your Style Personality.

The Style Personality Framework

Fiona introduced 8 style personalities (most people are a combination of 2-3):

* Classic - Tailored, timeless, structured, minimal accessories

* Relaxed - Comfort-first, natural fabrics, effortless look

* Dramatic - Bold, impactful, prioritizes looks over comfort

* Rebellious - Irreverent, edgy details, doesn’t follow rules

* Creative - Unique, vintage, mood dresser, quirky color combinations

* Sultry - Glamorous, figure-embracing, bold accessories

* Feminine - Soft fabrics, gentle details (lace, ruffles), warm colors

* Elegant - Sophisticated, uses color and print with structure

» Curious to find out which Style Personalities you are? Find out here in Fiona’s free Style Personality Quiz.

The “Shoulds” Problem That Blocks Our Authenticity

* Women often abandon their authentic style due to cultural/role expectations. Here we go again ladies.

* “I should dress like this” or “I shouldn’t wear that at my age” - bugger that! If you love it and it feels great on, go for it.

* Many of us were of a certain style in our 20s. Trying to hang on to that in midlife and make it ‘fit’ with who we are now, that’s not going to feel ‘right’. Let’s embrace the now, who we are now and move forward from there.

* We talked about the “mutton dressed as lamb” saying and how that impacts us.

Life Transitions & Style Evolution

Style personality can shift during major transitions - many of these happen in midlife often all at once. It’s in these major shifts that we feel the pull of re-invention - to meet the needs of that change and at the same time, feel like it’s us as we do.

* Career changes - maybe you’re pulling back into ‘retirement territory’ so going casual is calling loudly. Fiona said that is often the greatest challenge for some Style Personalities too - how to dress more casually without losing their authentic self.

* Returning from maternity leave - maybe you need to step things up a bit

* Kids leaving home - time to let go and dress for the fun stuff! :)

* Moving locations - weather and lifestyle changes.

Fiona suggests revisiting your style every 3-5 years is often helpful.

Practical Tips for Discovery

Start in Your Own Wardrobe:

* Identify “alien pieces”—items you like in theory but never wear

* Analyze what doesn’t work: colour, print, fabric, cut, details?

* Examine pieces you love and feel amazing in

* Look for patterns, common themes, in your preferences

Shopping Strategy:

* Don’t look outward first (social media, trends)—look inward

* Use Google Shopping with your style words + item name + “street style” - Erica and I thought this was a smokin’ hot tip promising to do this and report back :)

* Experiment without the pressure to buy - browse and play.

* Try things on - that’s the only way you’re really going to know how you feel in something. Online doesn’t necessarily translate.

* Return things that don’t work after trying at home - they’ll only weigh you down and take up valuable wardrobe real estate.

Baby Steps As You Build Confidence

* As you get curious and experiment, Fiona’s advice: For people who know you, it will be new (you may get mixed reactions and that’s okay). For strangers, that’s just who you are. It’s a fresh start.

* Top Tip: Test new looks in places where you don’t know people first to help feeling less self-conscious.

* Build confidence gradually - get curious, experiment with one thing. Step out and see how it feels. Then go again with something new. Baby steps build confidence.

* Focus on fabric and cuts that feel like YOU - you’re not shopping to fit in with a trend, you’re shopping for who you are - your Style Personality.

Freedom - Your Style Liberation Will Happen

* To feel at home and at ease in your clothes without thinking about it all day - we have enough to think about. It’s so liberating when you don’t feel the drain of that chore.

* Be curious and experiment rather than being hard on yourself - have a bit of fun with it.

* Style personality dictates colors, fabrics, cuts, accessories—everything.

* Give yourself permission to not follow trends that don’t suit you - be mindful that just because it looks good on someone else, it might not feel right for you.

* Give yourself time - this is not a quick fix—it can take 2 weeks to 6 months to discover your style. Be kind to you as you go along.

* Embrace who you are now, not who you were or who you think you should be - now more than ever in midlife let’s kick those expectations that have shackled us in the past, to the curb. We don’t need them holding us back.

Dressing for who you are is liberating. Free to be me!

Go get ‘em :)

Thanks Fiona.

Anita xx

Find Your Style Personality

Curious about your Style Personality? Take Fiona’s free and fun Style Personality Quiz. You might be surprised with what it reveals :)

Grab More Style Wisdom

Fiona’s based in Australia but has clients all over the world. She can help you online or in person. Start here on her Style Liberation website and head to Services.

Online:

* in her caring, supportive Community of women who help each other reclaim their personal style.

* Course

* Membership

Website: StyleLiberation.com.au

Socials: Instagram & Facebook

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