#228: We’re Not Fighting, But We’re Not Okay: The Truth About Emotional Burnout In Relationships

Love Shack Live: Helping Couples Rescue Their Relationships

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13d ago 54:03

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You’re not angry. You’re not yelling. You’re just… tired.

The kind of tired that sinks in so deep, you’re not even fighting anymore, you’re just holding it together in silence, hoping things will somehow fix themselves. If love feels like a burden lately, if you find yourself walking on eggshells or wondering why it’s so quiet at home, you’re not alone. In fact, you’re living through one of the most common, yet least talked about, relationship struggles of our time: emotional exhaustion.

Welcome to Love Shack Live, the podcast for anyone at a relationship crossroads. Whether you’re trying to save your marriage, navigating space and separation, or aching to reconnect with your partner, we’re here to help you rebuild something real and lasting. I’m Staci Bartley, joined by my partner Tom and our daughter Brooke. Together, we’ll get honest about what’s actually happening when couples stop fighting, not because they’ve healed, but because they’ve run out of gas.

Here’s what we’re unpacking this week:

Why “peace and quiet” can actually be a danger sign
The real-life symptoms of emotional burnout most people miss
How magical thinking (“we’ll get to it later”) quietly sabotages connection
The invisible emotional labor that wears us down, especially for over-functioners and the quietly checked-out
Why punishing your partner (or yourself) for not “fixing it” never works
How modern life is straining our capacity for love, and what to do about it
Practical ways to refuel your emotional gas tank (even when you feel totally spent)
Why play and joy aren’t optional, they’re the medicine your relationship desperately needs
The single most important skill you were never taught about love (and how to finally practice it)

If you’re exhausted from trying to keep your relationship together, or just tired of being the one who always tries, this episode will help you name what you’re feeling, and finally offer a way forward. We’ll share the science, the stories, and the skills that can help you stop spiraling, reconnect, and rebuild.

Here’s our big question:

What if “not fighting” isn’t a sign things are getting better, but the clearest warning that your relationship needs help, now?

It’s not your fault. You just haven’t learned the skills yet. Join us in the Love Shack, let’s talk about what no one else is saying, and get you the relief you deserve.

🎯 Want to go deeper?

Take the $9 Self-Assessment here: https://stacibartley.com/separation-survival-kit/space-communication-playbook/
Start the 30-Day Roadmap and stop spiraling: https://stacibartley.com/self-paced/30-day-roadmap
Get community support inside the Better Love Club (available as an add-on with the roadmap)

Chapters

1. #228: We’re Not Fighting, But We’re Not Okay: The Truth About Emotional Burnout In Relationships (00:00:00)

2. Signs and Symptoms of Emotional Exhaustion (00:02:56)

3. Cultural and Societal Impacts on Relationships (00:03:58)

4. The Invisible Strain on Relationships (00:07:07)

5. The Power of Communication and Understanding (00:08:09)

6. The Cycle of Thoughts, Feelings, and Behaviors (00:20:07)

7. The Importance of Relationship Skills (00:25:22)

8. Facing the Unexpected Challenges in Relationships (00:28:21)

9. The Reality of Emotional Exhaustion (00:29:25)

10. The Struggle of Authenticity in Relationships (00:29:47)

11. The Importance of Play and Refueling (00:33:16)

12. Practical Ways to Refuel and Reconnect (00:39:16)

13. The Role of Fun in Strengthening Relationships (00:41:50)

14. Final Thoughts and Encouragement (00:46:10)

229 episodes

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