Why Recovering Addicts Make Great Bishops | An Interview With Mike Houghtaling Leading Saints podcast

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Why Recovering Addicts Make Great Bishops | An Interview with Mike Houghtaling

1d ago 1:00:33

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This is a rebroadcast. The episode originally ran in June 2021.

Mike Houghtaling was raised in Bellevue, Washington, and Raleigh, North Carolina, and served in the Argentina Cordoba Mission. He and his family have lived in Georgia for over 30 years. Since entering recovery, he served as a bishop’s counselor, a high councilor, and at the time of this recording was serving as the bishop of the Fayetteville Georgia YSA Ward. He worked for the Federal Aviation Administration for 37 years, most of those as an air traffic controller, retiring in 2019. Mike and his wife Andrea have five children and seven grandchildren. Mike tries to work his recovery just one day at a time.

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Highlights

Times are approximate, due to differences between the original and rebroadcast audio.
5:10 About Mike’s ward and his personal family history

10:30 Discovered pornography at age 10 and immediately fell into addiction and shame

12:30 Sought help from his bishop but the guidance didn’t help

15:15 Considered his mission a failure and returned home believing himself the worst of people

17:30 The misunderstanding that marriage and sex would eliminate the problem

19:10 “Porn has no more to do with sex than alcohol has to do with thirst”

20:45 Misunderstanding the difference between sobriety and the healing of recovery, never addressing the shame and wounding

23:00 Hitting rock bottom and finally realizing that he could not hide anymore

26:30 The hopeless concept that everyone protected by the Atonement was under a big umbrella, but he was not under that umbrella

28:30 A tiny thread of hope touched his heart and he began to take the 12 steps seriously and began seeking recovery and healing, not simply sobriety

31:10 Recognition that his wife needed attention for her wounds

33:00 You have to pick up every tool along the way because they can all be helpful

34:00 One helpful tool: Face it, replace it, connect; the power of connection

35:50 Called as a bishop’s counselor

36:30 Explanation of PASG: Pornography Addiction Support Group and the spouse support group

41:15 Telling his story to his YSA ward to show that he is relatable and unafraid of their struggles

44:45 Advice for bishops: invite those struggling with addiction to go to an ARP meeting, go with them, study and seek to understand

47:00 “You are not beyond His help, you are not beyond His reach.”

49:00 Advice for stake presidents: take a chance on different candidates for positions of leadership in the Church

50:50 Metaphor of a quilt with one inky square in the shadows

53:00 Still working steps 10, 11, and 12, the maintenance steps

54:30 Advice for those in the circle of a recovering addict: love them, show grace for and connect with them, and continue to point them towards the Savior

56:30 Supporting the addict’s family members: connect, encourage, listen, point them toward therapy

58:45 Learning to be a true follower and finding healing in understanding the Savior is what has helped him to be a better leader

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Why Recovering Addicts Make Great Bishops | An Interview with Mike Houghtaling

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