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In a world where conversations too often spiral into shouting matches or dead ends, is there a better way forward? In this episode, we explore the radical idea that curiosity, not winning, should be the goal of tough conversations. Drawing on insights from linguistics, psychology, and real world examples, we unpack practical tools anyone can use to transform conflict into connection.

Whether you’re debating politics at the dinner table, clashing with a coworker, or scrolling through heated comment threads, these strategies can help you listen more deeply, ask smarter questions, and keep conversations alive, even when agreement feels impossible.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Why curiosity signals respect and builds trust, even with people you disagree with.
• How to replace “agree to disagree” with something more meaningful.
• The difference between a “soldier mindset” (defend at all costs) and a “scout mindset” (explore to understand).
• The power of simple, curious questions like “Tell me more” or “What makes that important to you?”
• Everyday tactics, like using “I” statements and nonverbal listening cues—that instantly change the tone of disagreements.

Why Listen?
If you’ve ever walked away from a disagreement feeling frustrated, misunderstood, or disconnected, this episode will give you a roadmap for doing better. It’s not about winning arguments, it’s about learning how to have conversations that matter.

Resources & References Mentioned:

• Marissa Fond, Georgetown University, on curiosity as the foundation of civil discourse.
• Julia Galef’s Scout vs. Soldier Mindset.
• Civil discourse strategies from conflict resolution and communication research.

Take the Listener Challenge:
This week, when you feel the urge to argue, try asking one genuine curiosity, driven question instead. Share your story with us, we’d love to feature it in a future episode!

Socials:

Instagram/X: @kylethehorton

Intro: Head in The Clouds Album - Matthew Morelock

Outro: Where The Sun Is - Jellyfish Beats

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