Afraid of Making The Wrong Choice
Manage episode 506875478 series 3550505
Decision dread, analysis paralysis, and the fear of “messing it up” can keep you stuck on the couch while life moves on. In this episode, Andrew and Cat break down how to make choices with more ease, treat “wrong” choices as data, and shift from scarcity (“there’s only one right path”) to abundance (“there’s another bus coming”). Expect gentle reframes, fast decision tools, and permission to experiment.
Key takeaways
- There are almost no “wrong” choices—only feedback. A result you don’t like is information for your next step.
- Indecision is a decision. Choosing not to choose keeps you in anxiety; pick a direction and learn.
- What’s meant for you won’t pass you by. Missed chances circle back in new ways; rejection can be protection.
- Widen the timeline. Over five years, most choices matter far less than they feel in the moment.
- Abundance > scarcity. Assume more options, more chances, and more support are on their way.
Practical tools you can use today
- 30-Second “gut check”
- Take 3 slow breaths.
- Say Choice A out loud; notice your body’s micro-response (expand or shrink?).
- Repeat for Choice B. Choose the one that feels more expansive—not necessarily easier.
- Two-way vs. one-way doors
- Most decisions are reversible (two-way). Act fast on those. Save careful deliberation for the few irreversible (one-way) choices.
- Set a decision deadline
- Define, “I’ll decide by Friday at 4pm.” Gather enough info, then commit.
- Regret test
- Ask: “Which option will I regret not trying?” Pick that.
- Premortem & 1st domino
- Imagine it went badly; list why; add safeguards. Then do the smallest first action (email, application, 10-min draft).
- Decision journal (one line!)
- “Today I chose X because Y; expected outcome Z.” Review monthly to learn your patterns.
- Micro-menu rule
- Overwhelmed by options? Narrow to two, choose, move. Practice on low-stakes stuff (meals, routes, outfits) to build the muscle.
Try this (5-minute script)
Write:
“If a friend were stuck on this exact choice, I’d tell them…
The smallest next step is…
If it’s wrong, I’ll know because… and then I’ll…”
Read it back and do that smallest step.
Reframes we love
- “Rivers don’t run straight.” Meanders are how you move forward.
- “Opportunities are like buses; there’s another one coming.” Missing one doesn’t end the route.
- “Life is a big platter of delights.” Pick something; you can try the next dish later.
- “Rejection is protection.” Closed doors redirect you to your door.
Signs you’re in scarcity (and how to flip it)
- “There’s only one right choice.” → Abundance flip: “There are many good-enough choices.”
- “If I miss this, it’s over.” → Flip: “If it’s for me, it returns.”
- “I need 100% certainty.” → Flip: “80% clarity + action beats 100% later.”
Resources & related episodes
- Feeling Like I’m Failing (pairs well with today’s topic)
- Contrast & Gratitude (how hard seasons clarify values)
- Self-Compassion (Kristin Neff) – practical exercises for kinder self-talk
📧 Coaching or questions: [email protected]
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📸 IG: @fiveyearyou
Memorable lines
- “You’ll learn more from a ‘wrong’ decision than a ‘right’ one.”
- “Indecision is a decision—to stay in anxiety.”
- “What’s meant for you won’t pass you by.”
- “Widen the time horizon; five-year-you rarely cares which salad you picked.”
Glimmers
- Andrew: A small delight—a new red shirt replacing the hospital-cut favorite, and the kindness behind it.
- Cat: A three-day weekend with the twins—space to slow down amid the school/activity whirlwind.
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87 episodes