212. When to STOP Showing Up to All Your Kid’s Stuff? (Spots, Events, Etc.)

Family Brand: Take Back Your Family

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Hey Family Brand crew! Today, we’re tackling a topic that might stir up some conversation—when should you stop showing up to all of your kid’s activities? As parents, we want to support our children and be there for them, but at what point does showing up to everything start to impact our time, energy, and even our family’s well-being? This is something Chris and I have been navigating lately, and I wanted to bring this conversation to the podcast so we can all reflect on it together.

We’ve always been a family that values showing up for each other. But recently, as our kids have gotten older and their schedules have become packed with sports and activities, we started to ask ourselves—does attending every single game, match, or event actually serve our family? After a particularly overwhelming week of 12 different games across multiple sports, I found myself exhausted, our youngest daughter was feeling dragged along, and we realized it was time to reassess what showing up really looks like for us.

One perspective that really caught my attention was from an interview with author Linda Flanagan, where she suggested that parents shouldn’t feel pressured to attend everything. Instead, she encourages modeling a happy adulthood by maintaining your own interests and not relying on your kids’ activities to define your purpose. That really hit home for me! It made me realize that sometimes, stepping back is just as valuable as showing up—it teaches kids independence, resilience, and that their worth isn’t tied to parental attendance.

That said, every family is different. Some parents genuinely love going to every game, and that’s great! But if you’re feeling stretched too thin or questioning whether this is sustainable, it might be worth having an open conversation with your kids. Some of our kids have told us, “I really want you at this game,” while others have said, “I don’t mind if you miss this one.” Giving them a say in the conversation can help create a balanced approach that works for everyone.

At the end of the day, it’s about being intentional with your time. Maybe showing up doesn’t always mean being physically present—it can also mean checking in after, celebrating their hard work, and making space for other meaningful family moments. So, if you’ve been feeling overcommitted or stretched too thin, I encourage you to take a step back and ask: What does showing up look like for our family? And is it time to redefine that?

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Links For This Episode:

1000 Hours Outside Podcast, episode 414. Take Back the Game - https://open.spotify.com/episode/5HviEz3k009L0f1ajteSY9?si=eGONqFu7SAKWV0qXiJVRmQ

Episode Minute By Minute

0:00 – A conversation worth having: Do we need to go to everything?
2:00 – The pressure parents feel to attend every activity
5:00 – When supporting one child starts to affect the whole family
7:30 – What research says about showing up vs. stepping back
10:00 – Having an open conversation with your kids about expectations
12:00 – Redefining “support” and creating balance for the whole family

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this! Have you ever questioned whether you need to be at everything? Let’s continue the conversation—message me on Instagram or share your thoughts with your partner this week. See you next time!

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#Parenting #Chris and Melissa Smith #Family Brand #Marriage #Connectionparenting #Familyculture #Intentionalchildren #Kidspersonaldevelopment #Value #Relationship