Ep. 152: When One of You Shuts Down: Understanding the Avoider in Marriage

Expedition Marriage with Chris & Jamie Bailey

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25d ago 42:07

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Do you ever feel like you're talking to a wall? Or maybe like you're carrying all the emotional weight in your marriage? If so, you might be married to an Avoider—someone who disconnects emotionally, struggles with vulnerability, and often insists they’re “fine” when they’re anything but.

In today’s episode, we’re taking a deeper look into what emotional avoidance really is, where it comes from, and—most importantly—how to build emotional safety and connection in a marriage where one spouse tends to shut down.

💬 “Being married to an avoider doesn’t mean your spouse doesn’t care—it often means they were never taught how to engage emotionally in healthy ways.”

🧭 What You’ll Learn:

The traits and mindset of the Avoider Love Style
Why emotional shutdown isn’t personal—it’s protective
What it’s really like being married to an avoider
How their childhood may have shaped their emotional patterns
Practical and biblical tools to invite connection and build trust
Encouragement for avoiders to grow emotionally and spiritually

📖 Scriptures Mentioned:

Psalm 34:18 – “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted…”
Ezekiel 36:26 – “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you.”

🎯 Take Action:

Visit ExpeditionMarriage.org for biblically based marriage resources and counseling.
Share this episode with a friend who may be married to an avoider.
Don’t forget to leave a rating or review to help more couples discover hope and healing.

💡 You’re not stuck in a cycle of disconnection—there is hope, growth, and emotional intimacy waiting on the other side of avoidance. Let’s start the journey together.

157 episodes