Dr. Apples recounts his search for the legendary Giggling Goblin Green tea, a brew so potent it makes Vegas headliners look tame. Between dodging eye fuzzies and side-stepping hobos with dubious financial advice, he stumbles into a tea house straight out of a fever dream, run by British gentlemen with Oxford-grade eccentricity and a barista who warns him like a haunted fortune cookie. Just as he’s sipping on the promise of anarchy, in burst pirates—the eco-conscious kind with sustainable swag and caffeine cravings sharper than their wooden swords.

Dr. Apples, never one to waste a good mess, tricks them into sipping enchanted teas that launch them into chaotic side quests: a burger brawl with the Deep Fry Demon, a romantic math show featuring a flirtatious sea monster, a Black Friday bloodbath, and a theatrical debut that gets booed off stage. Peace is restored, pirates are dispatched, and Dr. Apples walks out victorious—tea in hand and trouble on the horizon.
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What happens when you mix a dash of whimsy with a pinch of mystery and a whole lot of tea? Journey with us into the whimsical world of Dr Apples, where a simple stroll down Tchoupitoulas Street leads to an unexpected encounter with a clingy eye fuzzy and a detour into the mystical Temporal Tastings House. Meet the enigmatic tea masters, Reginald Thistlewaite and Percival Fortiscue, as they offer brews that promise to unlock doors to realms beyond our understanding. You'll find yourself pondering the peculiar and pondering the possibilities as we sip on tales that transcend reality.
Prepare for a tide of laughter as we chart a course through the chaotic and comedic adventures of a pirate in "Calculus of Love." This lovesick buccaneer takes on algebraic affection challenges in a quest to win over the extraordinary Gertrude Boo, a mer-octopus with a flair for the dramatic. From surviving the madness of Black Friday to stealing the show on a Hollywood stage, our pirate's escapades are filled with humor, romance, and unexpected turns. Join us for a rollicking tale of love, algebra, and the surprising paths we navigate in pursuit of our dreams.
CAST
Dr. Apples - Anthony J. Santora
Reginald Thistlethwaite - Jon Mcnally
Percival Fortescue - Chris Sansom
Captain - Cormac Brennan
Pirate 1 / Hobo / Audience 1 / Customer 1- Nasim Benelkour
Pirate 3 / Announcer - Matt Beckius
Lacie – Lacye A. Brown
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