Cuts. Jabs. Barbs. Narcissists excel at them all. Malignant narcissists can be quite overt in their cruel comments. However, most narcissists are more elegant, sinister, and insidious in their hurtful jabs. They might be hard to recognize as long as you are in the relationship. Because they have intently studied you, they know right where your pain points are. They have a knack of subtly slashing at your core, leaving you feeling like there is something inherently wrong with you. My husband used something as banal as my favorite color to get in narcissistic shots. My entire marriage, I felt like something was wrong with me, because the insidious nature of his digs.

And, if you tell them that what they said hurt your feelings, they will most likely tell you that you are being too sensitive. Or, they will turn it into a full-on DARVO situation, making you out to be the bad guy and them the helpless victims.

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