Matis Miller is founder of The Center for CBT of New Jersey and author of forthcoming, The Uncontrollable Child. Matis specializes in several emotional and personality disorders, complex childhood trauma, and anxiety in teens and adults. He is a seasoned lecturer on CBT- and DBT-related topics, addressing parents, clients, and professionals, and is…

In this short dose of Therapized, we explore the pattern of feeling "guilty" in common day-to-day situations in which we did not actually do anything wrong and may find ourselves consistently apologizing just for existing and attempting to get our needs met. Why do we even feel guilt anyway? Listen to today's dose for your own self-reflection. Enjo…

Nicole Arzt is a practicing psychotherapist in Southern California. She has worked with a wide variety of individuals, couples, and families. Her clinical emphasis lies in treating substance use, eating disorders, and complex trauma. An accomplished author, Nicole is a contributing writer for numerous mental health organizations. She owns Soul of T…

In today's episode we explore how our response to our big emotional experiences may not help and may only exacerbate the problem. Then we review my 3 simple tips to begin practicing increasing your emotional distress tolerance. Because ultimately we can't fully control how we feel, but with these tips hopefully we can learn to became less overwhelm…

First off, Happy New Year! Did you make any resolutions? If so, how are those going? In today's episode we talk about making behavioral change and personal growth as well as explore the difficulties in sustaining long-term growth. In this episode I review 4 concepts and tips that I use regularly in therapy with clients to support them in their own …

Pardon the audio on this one, but it was a great conversation with a great therapist, Dr. Yoni Sobin the Nerd Therapist!Dr. Yonatan Sobin (The Nerd Therapist) is a Clinical Psychologist trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), who practices using the Superhero Therapy model developed by Dr. Janina Scarlet. He prides himself on making therapy …

On today’s episode we are joined by Meghan O’Nyon, LMFT. In her private practice, Meghan specializes in working with children, teens, and adults on various issues including Autism/developmental delays, behavioral problems, anxiety, depression, grief, and existential re-evaluation. Listen as we discuss our approaches to these topics as they arise in…

In today’s episode we explore 3 themes that arise in my work as a therapist that relate to impact of social media on mental health. This includes what we do with the information overload, how we assess our relationship with social media, and reflect on how social media connects us or disconnects us from one another. Now I haven’t yet watched the Ne…

On today's episode I am providing a "dose" of Therapized. This will become a regular shorter episode focused on current topics addressed in my work as a therapist. On today's episode I review 2 themes I have addressed in therapy during the pandemic: meeting basic needs and redefining our purpose and meaning in life. Episode will also be available o…

On today’s episode we are joined by Natalie Silva, LMFT. Natalie has experience working with youth and families but currently specializes in women’s mental health in her private practice. Natalie is also a trained perinatal mental health therapist and works with new and expecting mothers. Listen as we discuss issues unique to women’s health like se…

In this episode I sit down with Dan Main, LMFT to discuss EMDR and Trauma. Dan Main, LMFT became licensed in 2015 and EMDR Trained in 2016. In addition to running a part time private practice in Walnut Creek (now via Telehealth in CA), he is a Program Supervisor at Community Options for Families and Youth in the Educationally Related Mental Health …

In this episode I sit down with Maria Gregory, a Licensed Educational Psychologist, to discuss a brief introduction to special education and how to recognize mental health symptoms in children and how they may manifest in the school environment. You can find more information about Maria Gregory at www.mariagregorylep.com. Also, please check out www…

Welcome to 2020! Have you ever felt that things in your life would be alright once you got "there?" Whatever that "there" might be: paying off debt, graduating from school, getting another job, your children moving out, retirement, etc. Today's episode is about balancing the goals we are striving for and also recognizing and having gratitude for wh…

Is the idea of failure a barrier that leads to avoidance? Or do you view it as a necessity to personal growth and development? In this episode I reflect upon the idea of failure to explore how may remove our ability to grow, adapt, and succeed simply by attempting to avoid failure. We also explore reframing failure from a negative experience to a n…

Ever feel badly for turning down offers, invites, requests or favors? Does saying "yes" often result in feeling resentful, overwhelmed, and overall distressed? Do you feel selfish or like a bad friend/sibling/coworker for saying "no?" Well today we explore the guilt of saying "no" and how the meaning we create around setting personal boundaries can…

In this episode we have two very special guests, friends, and fellow therapists, Sandy Kong and Stephanie Kaufman! Sandy has worked with clients struggling with substance abuse, addiction, and more recently provided grief work for families that have lost a family member to homicide. Stephanie has worked extensively with families by supporting them …

In this episode we explore a basic concept: trusting the process. Why is that important? Well, the process is the part that we control, and the outcome we may be hoping for can be elusive or even disappointing leading to further frustration, anxiety, and even helplessness. Therefore, attach to the process!…

In this episode, we wrap things up for my 5 Keys to Effective Communication with "Nothings Personal, but Love." In this episode, we tie all keys to together. It's easy to take things personally and end up in conflict with our loved ones, colleagues, and sometimes even strangers. In this episode, we explore taking a step back realizing that other pe…

Being honest when communicating is more than telling the truth; it's about being honest with ourselves, recognizing our vulnerabilities, admitting our reactions to insecurities, and reflecting upon why we said what we said or did what we did. I break it down in this episode in 3 basic parts. Also, this episode will get us to 1,000 listens! Which me…

In this episode, we look at "assuming ignorance over intent" in our relationships with others. Why is this important? So that we don't react to situations that trigger us, but explore conflicts and tension with curiosity to find more effective ways of interacting with others. Listen to this brief episode for 3 easy steps to practicing my 3rd key to…

In this episode, we explore the idea of "Owning It." Essentially taking responsibility for your own thoughts, opinions, feelings, experiences, values, actions, and expectations. Why is this important? So we can adapt and grow in our relationships when other people's experiences and actions differ from our own.…

Today we sit down with William Dansby, an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist, in order to discuss the foundations of Attachment Theory. Attachment refers to a strong emotional bond (or attachment) to a primary caregiver, often our mother at child birth, and how effectively the primary caregiver met their child's needs. The theory also explores…

In part 1 of my 5 Keys to Effective Communication series, we focus on assertiveness. We briefly explore passive, passive-aggressive, and aggressive forms of communication and aim to develop assertive statements by communicating in a calm, clear, and confident manner in hopes of developing and strengthening our relationships by creating the space to…

Sometimes our natural response to anxiety is to avoid it by engaging in various forms of the "flight response." This can come in many ways as we as humans can provide ourselves with distractions to ease the discomfort from experiencing anxiety. In this episode we explore the common avoidance patterns from the "escapers" to the "doers" and how both …

Are you getting into consistent conflicts or power struggles with friends, coworkers, or family? You may be falling into "The Anxiety Trap." In this episode we explore how our un-managed feelings of anxiety can impact our ability to be effective problem-solvers in our relationships with others; ultimately leading to increased and sustained conflict…

Misunderstandings are easy and effective communication can be incredibly difficult! In this episode we preview some basic and common barriers to relational conflicts and my 5 keys to effective communication to overcome those barriers. This is episode is an appetizer of what is to come as we will take each key and create it's own episode with specif…

Humans experience thousands and thousands of automatic thoughts per day. Some of those thoughts become unhelpful to our life. In this episode we explore some of the common unhelpful thinking patterns that may increase our feelings of anxiety and depression and ultimately influence the way we live our life. Check out my website for links to resource…

In this episode we explore some basic information regarding the brain's stress response and how it impacts our approach to conflict and new situations.