Best Trace Gaynor Podcasts (2025)

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Do You Ever Carry Someone You Couldn't Save? 22:57

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11h ago22:57

22:57

In today’s deeply moving episode, John shares a story most therapists would never dare reveal - the client who still haunts him years later. This isn’t about clinical textbooks or success stories. It’s about the raw, unfiltered truth of what happens when therapy collides with real life, addiction, and the weight of responsibility no one prepares yo…

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Two Therapists in Bed Talk: Can Men Say No to Casual Sex? (And Other Big Questions We Avoid) 26:04

6d ago26:04

26:04

From sex myths to second chances, safe choices to stuck seasons - John and Vanessa answer real listener questions from bed. You’ll hear why gendered scripts about sex don’t serve us, what really matters before getting back with an ex, how to choose the “risky” path without regret, and why feeling unmotivated can be a necessary pause - not a persona…

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Why Your World Feels Small (and How to Redefine Life Before It’s Too Late) 14:20

8d ago14:20

14:20

Sometimes life forces you to hit reset. For me, it was losing my house. For you, it might be a breakup, a career shift, or just that nagging feeling that life is smaller than it should be. In this walk-and-talk episode from Costa Rica, I share how I’ve been redefining everything: happiness, relationships, play, even what “success” means. The truth …

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Sh*t You Wouldn’t Ask Your Therapist | Heartbreak Hurts Here's Why 23:11

12d ago23:11

23:11

In today’s episode, John Kim takes on your raw, unfiltered questions about love — from the heartbreak of seeing an ex with someone new, to the chaos of dating in your 40s, to navigating loneliness, trauma, and self-worth. It’s the real talk you’ve been craving: messy, honest, and maybe the perspective you need to keep moving forward. Order John's n…

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When You Shut the Door on Miracles 20:34

9d ago20:34

20:34

What if it’s not the big traumas that hold us back, but the tiny cracks in how we think each day? In this episode, John Kim and Vanessa unpack how we unconsciously block miracles - through catastrophizing, over-stimulation, and self-protection - and how small shifts in mindset can open the door to flow, joy, and unexpected magic. If this helped, hi…

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Still Stuck on Your Ex | This is Why 15:49

15d ago15:49

15:49

Closure isn’t a door you wait to have slammed shut - it’s a bridge you build. In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim breaks the biggest “closure” myths and shows you how to move forward without an apology, a perfect explanation, or one last text. If you’ve felt stuck in relationship residue, this is your map. In this episode, you’ll learn: Wh…

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Stop Guessing Their Love: Say What Lands 26:08

20d ago26:08

26:08

A 30-second, playful moment sparked this episode - and a reminder: love isn’t generic. We break down how to speak love so it lands without abandoning yourself, especially when partners differ. What you’ll learn (10 takeaways): Love isn’t generic - different emotional blueprints How to avoid the “I’m giving everything, it’s still not enough” trap Bu…

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From Nauseous Nights to Perfect Mornings | Life in Costa Rica 16:12

22d ago16:12

16:12

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim takes you inside his personal journey of building a new life in Costa Rica - the highs, the lows, and the unexpected lessons about presence, clarity, and decision-making. From nausea-inducing dirt roads to perfect mornings surfing in Costa Rica, John unpacks how life-changing decisions aren’t made in one…

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Sh*t You Wouldn’t Ask Your Therapist | The Truth About Breakups 18:18

26d ago18:18

18:18

In today’s episode, John Kim answers raw, unfiltered listener questions on the theme of breakups and divorce — the things you’d never dare ask your therapist. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠…

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Loving Without Losing Me: Healing the Mother Wound 23:06

27d ago23:06

23:06

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim gets personal about the mother wound - how it quietly shapes our self-worth, love life, and sense of safety. From a surprising MDMA journey insight to stories about his Korean-American upbringing, John unpacks what it’s like to grow up without emotional warmth from mom - and how this absence leaves lasti…

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The Lie We Tell Men About Strength 25:27

29d ago25:27

25:27

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim unpacks the father wound - how it silently shapes our self-worth, relationships, and ideas of masculinity. Through raw personal stories and practical, street-level insights, he explores what it means to grow up with a “ghost father” and how both men and women can begin to heal. You’ll learn: Why the fath…

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Two Therapists in Bed Talk Breakups, Healing, and OnlyFans 25:06

1M ago25:06

25:06

In this episode, licensed therapists John Kim and Vanessa Bennett dive deep into healing, heartbreak, attachment styles, and codependency - all from the comfort of their bed. With real-life stories, practical insights, and the lens of depth psychology, they unpack what it really means to "heal" and why the journey is anything but linear. You’ll lea…

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Love Doesn’t Kill Jealousy - It Listens to It 25:04

1M ago25:04

25:04

In this episode, licensed therapist John Kim unpacks jealousy through raw personal stories and powerful insights. He dives into the emotional roots of jealousy, including insecurity, fear of abandonment, and core wounds — and offers real, practical tools to navigate it with compassion and clarity. You’ll learn: How jealousy actually protects us (un…

1
My F*cking Feelings: An "Unproductive" Day 20:42

1M ago20:42

20:42

Today, John shares a personal take on creativity, productivity, and the pressures they carry. He explores how AI is reshaping the creative process, the quiet power of everyday moments, and why it's worth challenging traditional ideas of success. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app…

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You're Not Too Much — They Just Weren't Equipped 24:04

1M ago24:04

24:04

Today, John unpacks how childhood experiences shape our ability to express emotions and why traits often seen as flaws can actually be powerful strengths. He also highlights the importance of reframing our emotional narratives, building a strong support system, and embracing the messy—but meaningful—journey toward authenticity. Order John's new boo…

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Why We Keep Chasing the Same Kind of Love 22:40

2M ago22:40

22:40

Today, John unpacks the complex layers of attraction, emotional wiring, and how our childhood shapes the way we love as adults. He dives into the connection between self-worth and the partners we choose, and why so many of us find ourselves settling—in both relationships and careers. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠ Jump i…

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One Month in Costa Rica: The Good, the Bad, and Could This Be Our New Home? 31:36

2M ago31:36

31:36

Today, John reflects on his first month living in Costa Rica—what's surprised him, what’s challenged him, and what’s changed him. He opens up about the warmth of the people, unexpected joy of slowing down, highs, lows, and lessons of this major lifestyle shift. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, ⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On…

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I Feel Lost. What's the First Step to Changing My Life? 27:52

2M ago27:52

27:52

Today, John explores the idea of rebirth and redefining happiness. He emphasizes the importance of pulling from personal truth, recognizing when you're in survival mode, and taking actionable steps towards authenticity and fulfillment. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app ⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠ Fol…

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The Race Was Never Real: Notes on Slowing Down Without Falling Behind 21:58

2M ago21:58

21:58

Today, John discusses the importance of embracing change, practicing mindfulness through surfing, and the significance of detachment from societal pressures. He also reflects on redefining success, finding joy in simplicity, and experiencing life in vibrant color. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠ Jump into John’s new Single. On…

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Nightcap, Costa Rica Edition: Burning Down Old Blueprints & Redefining Happy 32:59

2M ago32:59

32:59

Today, John reflects on the rapid changes in his life, the cultural adjustments he faces, and the importance of community and authentic relationships. He discusses the shedding of old blueprints and the creation of a new life that feels more honest and fulfilling. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your rel…

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Morning Coffee in the Jungle: Day in the Life & New Mindset Change 39:57

2M ago39:57

39:57

Today, John discusses the significance of family, the creative process of documenting life, and the concept of life as an act break. Throughout, he emphasizes the value of intentional living and how it shapes daily routines and interactions. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself…

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How Life Transitions Impact Relationships. 31:38

2M ago31:38

31:38

Today, John and Vanessa discuss their experiences and challenges after moving to Costa Rica. They explore themes of cultural adjustment, language barriers, relationship dynamics, community connection, and the impact of motherhood on their lives. ⁠Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with your…

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Costa Rica: Week One 31:59

2M ago31:59

31:59

Today, John discusses the challenges and joys of relocating, the importance of community, and the lifestyle changes that come with living in a new country. He reflects on the beauty of the beach life, the culinary delights of Costa Rican food, and the fears he faces about the future. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to…

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The Myth of ‘The One’: Why Soulmates Are Built, Not Found 22:51

2M ago22:51

22:51

Today, John unpacks the modern myth of the soulmate — and flips it on its head. Instead of chasing “the one,” he invites us to rethink soulmates as built, not found— and explores how true connection comes not from perfection, but from shared growth, challenges, and the courage to repair after rupture. Single On Purpose School⁠⁠⁠ starts July 9th! A …

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RE-RELEASE: Resting B*tch Face 13:37

2M ago13:37

13:37

Today, John talks about the transformative power of honesty. Reflecting on past relationships and personal beliefs, he explores the courage it takes to confront self-deception and encourages listeners to examine where they may be out of alignment. ⁠Single On Purpose School⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yours…

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Night Cap. Ramblings and Revelations (First One Since the Fire) 40:51

3M ago40:51

40:51

Today, John opens up about letting go of his former life and embracing new possibilities, including a bold move to Costa Rica. He shares insights on personal evolution, the changing landscape of entertainment in the digital age, and redefines love as a state of being. ⁠Single On Purpose School⁠ starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your re…

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You Don’t Need a Perfect Life. You Just Need This 30:20

3M ago30:20

30:20

Today, John redefines happiness — not as a far-off destination, but as a daily practice rooted in intention. He unpacks the myth of “arrival,” urging us to stop waiting for external circumstances to shift and instead cultivate joy from within. Single On Purpose School starts July 9th! A 6-week program to transform your relationship with yourself an…

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What is Healthy & Unhealthy Love? 15:26

3M ago15:26

15:26

Today, John explores the difference between healthy and unhealthy love — what each looks like, how they show up, and why the distinction matters. He unpacks the power of repair in relationships and how conscious effort is key to cultivating connection. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HER…

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Finding Joy After Fundamentalism with Heather McGinley 51:57

3M ago51:57

51:57

Today, John speaks with Heather McGinley about the complexities of her relationship with her father, the weight of growing up in a large, tightly controlled family, and the delayed realizations of trauma that surfaced later in life. Heather shares how becoming a mother reshaped her understanding of consent, boundaries, and forgiveness — and how the…

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Your 5 Most Asked Questions Answered 22:54

3M ago22:54

22:54

Today, John answers five of the most common questions about relationships and emotional well-being, from daily reminders for self-healing to why we attract emotionally unavailable partners, the difference between love and attachment, and how to spot settling. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose …

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After the Fire Series: My Last Day in LA 19:59

3M ago19:59

19:59

Today, John opens up about the emotional complexity of leaving Los Angeles for a new chapter in Costa Rica. He delves into the ideas of the "remembering self" and the "experiencing self," revealing how our memories often shape — and sometimes distort — the way we make decisions. I'm running a 7-Day "Done with the Bullsh*t" Detox — this isn't the ki…

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How Micromanaging Your Relationship Is Pushing Your Partner Away 24:49

3M ago24:49

24:49

Today, John explores how love often uncovers unresolved wounds, revealing the deeper work still to be done. He emphasizes the value of peace in a relationship over the illusion of control, and champions vulnerability and trust as the cornerstones of a lasting connection. I'm running a 7-Day "Done with the Bullsh*t" Detox — this isn't the kind with …

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Rewiring the Nervous System for a Calm Life in a Chaotic World 22:23

3M ago22:23

22:23

Today, John explores the vital role the nervous system plays in shaping our emotional health, relationships, and everyday experiences. He touches on how childhood experiences influence adult behavior, and practical techniques for nervous system regulation that foster healing and connection. I'm running a 7-Day "Done with the Bullsh*t" Detox — this …

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Nothing NEEDS to Happen 17:13

3M ago17:13

17:13

Today, John shares his revelation that 'nothing needs to happen' for happiness, and the shift from merely existing to truly living. Through anecdotes and reflections, he encourages listeners to embrace laughter, practice mindfulness, and engage with their community. I'm running a 7-Day "Done with the Bullsh*t" Detox — this isn't the kind with green…

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3 Non Negotiables Everyone Should Have 15:47

3M ago15:47

15:47

Today, John explores the power of identifying and honoring your personal non-negotiables. He highlights the importance of emotional congruence, setting clear boundaries, and shifting out of survival mode to create space for growth. I'm running a 7-Day "Done with the Bullsh*t" Detox — this isn't the kind with green juice and caffeine withdrawals. It…

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The NFL -> Addictions - > Awakening with “The Dude” Eben Britton 42:57

3M ago42:57

42:57

Today, John speaks with Eben Britton about life after the NFL- his struggles with addiction, mental health, and past trauma- and how plant medicine, fatherhood, and mindfulness helped him heal. They explore the weight of shame, the myth of quick fixes, and the power of presence, honesty, and authentic connection. Follow Eben HERE Find out more abou…

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Love is the Ghost That Won't Leave You Alone 16:36

3M ago16:36

16:36

Today, John explores love not just as a feeling, but as a conscious choice—one that requires vulnerability, discomfort, deep commitment, and more. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about John HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podc…

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Channeling Something Greater with Madison Vandereb 45:05

3M ago45:05

45:05

Today, John sits down with Madison Vandereb to explore the transformative role of plant medicine in personal growth, healing, and spiritual awakening. They discuss the power of intuition, the challenge of staying grounded through expansive spiritual experiences, the importance of integration, and how aligning the heart and mind can lead to more mea…

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How Trauma Responses Shape Us as Adults 26:39

4M ago26:39

26:39

Today, John and Vanessa unpack the lesser-known 'fawn' trauma response and how it often shapes adult relationships through people-pleasing and self-abandonment. They emphasizes the transformative power of setting boundaries, reclaiming one’s voice, and embodiment (the practice of reconnecting with the body to better understand our needs, emotions, …

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Love We're Too Scared To Claim 17:50

4M ago17:50

17:50

Today, John unpacks the concept of unpossessive love — a love rooted in freedom, presence, and gratitude rather than control. He invites listeners to reconsider what it means to truly love someone, and how letting go can sometimes be the most loving act of all. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpos…

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The Shame Men Carry From Childhood Sexual Experiences 16:45

4M ago16:45

16:45

Today, John opens up about authenticity, vulnerability, and why men need real conversations. From childhood wounds to mental health, he dives into the power of sharing your story—and breaking the silence. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more ab…

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You're Not Lost. You're Just Not Here (How Practicing Presence Rewires Your Life) 20:39

4M ago20:39

20:39

Today, John explores how being fully present can reshape the way we experience life. He reflects on the power of awareness, self-acceptance, the role our thoughts play in shaping reality, and how to deepen connections. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Fi…

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The New Epidemic - She’s Touched Out. He Wants More Sex 47:38

4M ago47:38

47:38

Today, John and Vanessa explore how intimacy, connection, and personal growth evolve in modern relationships. They discuss celibacy as a tool for self-discovery, shifting love languages, the balance between creativity and emotional needs, codependency, and more. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpo…

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What If You Left a Relationship and Aren’t Sure It Was the Right Decision? 22:44

4M ago22:44

22:44

Today, John unpacks the emotional weight of breakups — the doubt, the grief, and the loss of an imagined future. He explores the importance of self-reflection, emotional awareness, grieving with intention, and distinguishing between true longing and mere loneliness. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On P…

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Why I’m Not Having Sex For 30 Days 14:23

4M ago14:23

14:23

Today, John talks about being in the midst of a 30-day celibacy journey, exploring what it means to redirect sexual energy and embrace intentional living. He reflects on balancing masculine and feminine energies, deepening self-awareness, and the spiritual growth emerging from this bold experiment in self-discovery. Order John's new book, Break Up.…

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My Dick Journey 20:08

4M ago20:08

20:08

Today, John gets real about body image, masculinity, and self-love. From battling body dysmorphia to breaking cultural norms, he shares raw insights, hard truths, and how vulnerability led to healing. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Find out more about …

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The Misconception of Emotional Suppression (a.k.a. The Soda Can Effect) 18:55

4M ago18:55

18:55

Today, John debunks the myth of emotional suppression—aka the "soda can effect"—revealing that holding in emotions leads to burnout, not strength. Through personal insights and practical tips, he promotes healthy emotional expression as key to self-care, strong relationships, and a balanced life. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Ju…

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How MDMA Continues to Rewire My Soul 13:42

4M ago13:42

13:42

Today, John shares how an MDMA experience transformed his outlook on life, love, and personal growth. He reflects on living more presently, setting boundaries, finding deeper connection through everyday joys, and more. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HERE Follow John on Instagram HERE Fi…

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Why We Chase the Wrong People and How to Stop 15:58

4M ago15:58

15:58

Today, John explores why people are drawn to unhealthy relationships and how to break the cycle. He emphasizes the role of upbringing, the importance of self-awareness, the need for a corrective love experience to build healthier connections, and more. Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose, HERE Jump into John’s new Single. On Purpose app HER…

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The Intersection of Life Changes 18:49

4M ago18:49

18:49

Today, John unpacks the pivotal moments that reshaped his life — from a house fire and turning 52, to a powerful medicine journey. He shares how these events sparked a deeper commitment to honesty and emphasizes the value of auditing your commitments, embracing discomfort, and choosing change as a gateway to a more meaningful life. I'm running a pr…