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Complex PTSD Recovery [Reports]: We Are Traumatized Motherfuckers

CPTSD, Intergenerational PTSD, Relational Trauma | TMFR LLC

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Part of the Traumatized Motherfuckers' Research Project: What you need to know about CPTSD, in bitesized summaries of our in-depth research efforts. Peer-reviewed research and irreverent dark humor meet trauma recovery, without the "bright sides." Let's talk about the complicated experience of rectifying a life built on trauma, relearning how to have relationships, and re-imagining your future... in micro chunks. (When you're ready, jump into the deep end, detailed below.) You aren't alone, ...
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Mind Beyond the Mission

Brian McKenna and Laryssa Lamrock

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Dive deep into the real issues experienced by Veterans, former RCMP members and Families living with mental health injuries. Mind Beyond the Mission is a podcast focused on having authentic conversations that are gritty, honest and informative. Mind Beyond the Mission is hosted by Laryssa Lamrock and Brian McKenna, members of the lived experience team at the Atlas Institute for Veterans and Families.
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The show’s goal is to help you learn about different ways you heal from past emotional wounds and trauma. Hosted by mental health therapist Rosa Shetty, who specializes in helping adults heal from childhood trauma. Topics center on inner child work, ancestral healing, psychology, yoga, meditation, magic, energy healing, arts, and indigenous healing modalities. The episodes are free-flowing conversational-style with a diverse group of guests. If you find yourself asking the following question ...
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In this episode of Mind Beyond the Mission, host Laryssa Lamrock is joined by guest co-host Tarik Kadri and special guest Guy Dallaire for a conversation about the impacts and complexities of vicarious trauma and intergenerational trauma among military and Veteran Families. Guy Dallaire was born into a multigenerational military Family — both his f…
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Laryssa Lamrock and guest co-host Staff Sergeant (Ret’d) Gary Hollender are joined by Sheri Lux. Sheri opens up about losing her husband Mike, a Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP) officer, who died by suicide in 2017. Sheri shares her journey of healing and self-discovery, providing insights into the unique challenges faced by RCMP Families, the …
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VIDEO (FREEEEEE) Compassion requires protection in the form of relationship-allowing boundaries. read: not relationship-ending rules. What are boundaries, how do we set them, and how do we make sure they're enacted? Talking inner and outer boundaries to separate their shit from yours, so love can exist. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for mo…
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In this episode of Mind Beyond the Mission, Laryssa Lamrock is joined by guest co-host Andrew Gough — a Canadian Armed Forces (CAF) Veteran, serving Reservist and medically retired police officer — and guest Emily Zufelt. Emily is a former police dispatcher, advocate for first responders, military members and Veterans, and host and creator of What’…
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So my CNS has been plugged to a 50amp this week, hburs? Gratefully heard some sounds under the near-full moon that swept a bitta anxiety away Have an immersive walk and some guided visual breaths with Marcus and me It's a predawn stroll through waterfalls and frogs, break glass in case of nerves on fire Goin nature zen, Fuckers 😮‍💨🌱💦🌊🐸🌕✨ Video Host…
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A VIDEO Memories detached from the whole -> views too big or too small which lock the brain into patterned behaviors and outcomes. Talking perspective resizing and generational ego acquisitions in our Feb drop. And for all the unfolding expansions? Come check patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info…
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This new episode is with Dolores Villanueva, LCSW. Dolores is a mental health therapist, professor, entrepreneur, mental health advocate, and speaker. In our conversation, Dolores shares her life story, her wisdom from navigating adversaries, and healing. To learn more about Dolores check out her IG @letsweavewisdom. Disclaimer: This podcast episod…
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This special compilation episode of Mind Beyond the Mission brings together the most valuable insights from two conversations with Dr. Lyn Turkstra and Veteran and CFL player Ryan Carey, who each joined Brian and Laryssa on Mind Beyond the Mission previously to share their perspectives as a clinician specializing in traumatic brain injury and a per…
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“If I'm forming a consultation group, I'm not going to bring someone there that I know whose role in life is to flip the applecart over. There's no value there. But if I look around the room at a grouping of people I've gathered and there's no one there that's ever showed me dissent to an idea before, I have not formed a consultation group. I have …
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Corporal (Ret’d) Josh Muir joined Brian and Laryssa to talk about his experiences with the complex and deep-rooted relationship between alcohol and military culture. Josh shared how his journey to sobriety grew from external pressures from loved ones into a deep, personal commitment and discusses the value of openness and vulnerability in his recov…
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What waits inside your self? STRESS, BIG EMOTIONS, MISALIGNMENTS, AND HUMILIATING MEMORIES, anyone? Let's summarize these stops on our spooktacular self-adventure. VIDEYUM! For the full ride, including DISASSOCIATION, the WHAT'S NEXTS, and FEAR check patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers Happy holiday season ❄️☃️❤️‍🔥 leave a holiday tip Hosted on Ac…
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Corporal (Ret’d) Shauna Mulligan, a Métis Veteran of the Canadian Army Reserve, joined Brian and Laryssa to reflect on her experiences and insight on how Indigenous culture and military service can intersect and interact with each other. Shauna shares her personal journey of understanding her identity and cultural heritage and the challenges of int…
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Video! It's that time. Whether you're NC, LC, or BC (bitter contact), it helps to integrate evidence and recognize your personal "ENOUGH." For more help with the holidays, check patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers and find the free Holiday Survival Collection. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.…
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We're doing something extra 💀 It's a halloween, election, and holiday season special! 💀 Today we begin exploring our abandoned selves and exorcising awaiting demons. What's in store when we reconnect with our lives? Stress, the big negative feels, constant disassociation attempts, horrifying memories of self, tense misalignments between beliefs and…
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Colonel Telah Morrison, OMM, CD, retired from the Canadian Armed Forces (CAF) in 2022 after 35 years of service in both the Regular and Reserve Forces. Telah joined the CAF in 1986 and went to Royal Military College (RMC) Saint-Jean, six years after the RMC began allowing women to attend in 1980. She is the first woman Logistics Officer in the Roya…
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The filthiest words: love yourself. 🤮 Why does trauma create barriers between us and... not hating us? Talkin' lost relationships, criteria for love, loss of self, and the endless self scrutiny created by post-traumatic judgments. It's a BIG EPISODE with some BIG ANNOUNCEMENTS - grab your pepto and let's talk about "self-love-y." WATCH IT HERE Host…
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When Jim Davis saw on the news that a Canadian soldier had been killed in Afghanistan, he thought to himself, “My son is serving there… but so are 2,000 other Canadian soldiers. The odds are that it isn’t him.” Jim faced a parent’s worst nightmare later that day upon learning that his son Paul was the person killed in the line of duty. In the 18 ye…
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For this episode, I invited Prisca Dorcas Mojica Rodriguez. Prisca is a storyteller, public theologian, and feminist. Prisca just released her second book "Tias and Primas: On Knowing and Loving the Women Who Raised Us." She is also the best-selling author of the book titled "For Brown Girls with Sharp Edges and Tender Hearts." In our conversation,…
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This episode is with Judy Stella, LCSW, author of Reverence: Echoes of Healing and Gratitude. In our conversation, Judy discusses what inspired her to write her deeply personal memoir. Trigger warning: Childhood trauma is discussed in this episode. Judy shares her story about growing up in Lennox, California and overcoming childhood abuse and adver…
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This episode is with Irisneri Alicea Flores. Irisneri is a professional genealogist from Puerto Rico. She completed genealogical research on my maternal side, and I will be sharing this with you all. The purpose of this is to give you all a glimpse of what to expect when working with a genealogist. Irisneri will demonstrate how she starts the resea…
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An overwhelming number of Canadian Armed Forces (CAF) and Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP) Veterans and their Families are directly and profoundly impacted by suicide loss. Yet, few know where, how or when to talk about it — or if it should even be discussed at all. Canadian Armed Forced (CAF) Veteran Dennis Mackenzie joined Brian and Laryssa o…
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When life serves conflictual and confusing information, our brains simplify it to survive... and fuck us over in the long-run. Let's talk about the "ALL GOOD" and "ALL BAD" self-defense mechanisms of Splitting and Projective Identification, what function they serve as children & adults, and how they create shitass trauma-bound lives down the line. …
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“When I’m talking about hypervigilance in the Veteran community, I’m actually talking about the perfect amount of vigilance, but for somewhere other than when you walk inside your home or when you go on vacation with your Family.” Hypervigilance — being constantly on high alert and keenly aware of your surroundings — is a critical skill for soldier…
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Ready to learn about the maladaptive tendencies of your most difficult relational partners? When we don't believe we're "entitled" to a need or emotion, we vent it into (unwise) action. Let's discuss the immature cognitive patterns we/others may still be utilizing to keep our brains "safe." We'll cover the lowest level self-defense mechanisms: Acti…
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In this episode of Mind Beyond the Mission, Brian and Laryssa are joined by Tabitha Beynen, a former Air Force medic and single parent navigating the complexities of balancing personal well-being and parenting while living with a posttraumatic stress injury (PTSI). They discuss: Managing personal well-being while caring for a child Finding balance …
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We've learned that narcs don't generally recover because of their "creative narration" abilities. Now, let's talk about some of the ways they spin those stories. Today, we start our examination of self-defense mechanisms by looking at the purposes of Intellectualization and Rationalization. Then, we ask the question: SO HOW SMART ARE THEY? And disc…
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An overwhelming number of Canadian Armed Forces (CAF) and Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP) Veterans and their Families are directly and profoundly impacted by suicide loss. Yet, few know where, how or when to talk about it — or if it should even be discussed at all. How soon is too soon? What happens when it's too late? What should one even say…
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They'll shake your hand while pissing on your leg, plead and then pulverize promises, and generally give the sense that they're one hundred people who share a face. But why? Let's talk about narcissist personality structuring that ranges from neurotic to psychopathic, but never hits the mark of "maturity." Meanwhile, creating the condition I've tit…
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Peer support can be described as having someone meet you where you are and walk alongside you in your journey. It can look different for everyone, but it boils down to a supportive relationship between people who share a common lived and living experience. In this episode, hosts Brian McKenna and Laryssa Lamrock discuss the profound impacts of peer…
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"Just feel good about your authentic self and don't let anyone wreck your recognition of specialness." Right. Let's talk about what may be holding us back from achieving this safe, centered, self-supportive, resilience-boosting psychological station, and the easiest way to achieve the "healthy self" that's never been otherwise defined. Adaptive Nar…
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“Am I burnt out or just tired?” “Am I sick or am I just fatigued?” “How can I be someone’s caregiver and their spouse at the same time?” These are questions that are often asked by Veteran Family members supporting a loved one with a health concern. Family members may sometimes find themselves shifting from “spouse mode” to “caregiver mode” and bac…
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This new episode of the podcast is with Maydelli Alitzel Mendoza de Escobar. Maydelli is an undocumented warrior-turned-conscious entrepreneur, transformational life coach, mental health advocate, and speaker. She began her spiritual journey 18 years ago, searching for inner healing. In our conversation, Maydelli shares her life story, her wisdom f…
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Trigger Warning: Sexual violence is discussed in this episode. This episode is with Brenda Martinez; she shares her story of surviving sexual violence, how she came to own and feel empowered by her story to help other women. Brenda founded Seek & Shine, an organization created to provide resources for women for individual and collective transformat…
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Trigger Warning: Sexual Abuse is discussed in this episode. This new podcast episode is with Robert Falconer, an Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapist, teacher, and writer. He has worked with trauma survivors for a significant part of his career. His primary focus now is working with unattached burdens (UB), which is a term used in IFS therapy to…
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Anger is a natural human emotion. Anger can motivate you, give you a sense of strength and help you react quickly to threats. Although many people think that being angry is wrong or inappropriate, anger itself is not a problem. For many Veterans, it was often integral to their missions and survival. However, the behaviours that stem from this emoti…
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Why is the decision to sacrifice or save our brains so difficult to make? Let's talk about subconscious narratives we probably all carry, the ambivalence-guilt connection, and the power of perception on caregiving burden. Find the transcript at t-mfrs.com Looking for the 9 full episodes on this topic? Hit up the Filial Obligation Collection on patr…
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Andrew and Elizabeth Gough join Brian and Laryssa on this episode of Mind Beyond the Mission to speak about the distinctive experiences of Reservist Families, including around community, connection and accessing care. The Reserve Force is an integral component of the Canadian Armed Forces (CAF), with Reserve Force units existing in hundreds of comm…
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A big 'nouncement; so long TMFRS! Then let's talk about what constitutes a VulNarc versus "a person with CPTSD." Where does the chronic manipulation come from? How are recovery resources used for trauma-unhealing? What's up with the hostility and antagonism? . Lots to cover in this mashup of "time, space, and energy" meets "VulNarcs" and "trauma-se…
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This new episode is with mental health therapist Carolina Quiroz, LCSW. Carolina shares her journey of healing from an eating disorder that she developed during her adolescence. Carolina also shares tips and strategies that help rest and restore. We also discussed spirituality and the role of spirit entities in the therapy room. We talked about boo…
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Major (Ret’d) Mark Campbell was wounded in 2008 while serving in Afghanistan with the 3rd Battalion, Princess Patricia’s Canadian Light Infantry. He lost both of his legs and his military career came to a sudden halt after 34 years of service. That instant in time marked a massive transformation in Mark’s life and that of his wife Donna, herself a …
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This year we spoke about Intimacy. Now it's time to confront *Intimacy.* Let's look at the discrepant programs that live inside of us, gathered across a lifetime of adaptation to extreme events and unhealthy narratives. We're talking Sexual Healing vs. Internal Family Systems and deprived needs. Need this conversation more than you knew? Check out …
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We're tying up loose ends in our discussion of relationships! Today, discussing the cognitive copy-pastes we accidentally carry out between past and present relationships - and they ways they set us back in our recovery goals while creating abusive dynamics. Need more thoughts about transference in all its forms? I've got another hour of material a…
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***Trigger warning: In this episode I share about pregnancy loss. This is my most vulnerable episode. The goal is to open up about my experience and my journey in navigating a very challenging 2023. I share what has helped me cope and process difficult times. I also read a brief excerpt by Buddhist philosopher Thích Nhất Hạnh from his book "No Deat…
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