Mind The Orgasm Gap
Manage episode 520380685 series 3680771
What if sex isn’t something we do, but a place we go together? We take that idea seriously and use it to reexamine the stubborn orgasm gap—how men climax more often in partnered sex, and what it actually takes for women to feel safe, aroused, and heard. From the lens of intimate justice to the very real numbers behind the disparity, we lay out how culture, porn scripts, and silence combine to make pleasure lopsided—and how education, trust, and honest language may flip the script.
We share candid stories of first orgasms, the role of headspace, and how tools like vibrators and specific media may help people learn their arousal patterns. But the heart of the conversation is relational: safety before strategy, curiosity before choreography. When partners ask specific questions—Where should I touch? Slower or firmer? Stay there?—and prioritize stimulation, pacing, and warm-up, the likelihood of mutual pleasure rises fast. We talk about why some women fake it, how to stay safe while advocating for yourself, and how women should consider debriefing so the next encounter gets better.
If you’ve ever wondered how to close the pleasure gap without turning intimacy into a checklist, this is your map. We offer sequencing tips like “ladies first” and a reminder that pleasure is learned, not luck. Join us as we challenge stale norms, trade performance for presence, and strive to design sex that’s generous, communicative, and genuinely shared. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a review telling us one rule you’re making non-negotiable.
Email us at [email protected], and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.
Chapters
1. Framing Sex As A Shared Place (00:00:00)
2. Welcome And What Is Intimate Justice? (00:00:39)
3. Origins of the Word Orgasm (00:02:33)
4. The Numbers Behind The Gap (00:03:46)
5. Women Who Have Never Experienced Orgasms (00:04:48)
6. The Magical World of Sybians (00:06:21)
7. Heidi's First Orgasm (00:09:11)
8. What Led to Jane's First Orgasm (00:11:14)
9. Etty's First Orgasm (00:13:37)
10. Orgasms From Masturbation vs Partnered Sexual Activity (00:16:34)
11. Women Advocating For Their Pleasure (00:19:23)
12. Faking It and Why We Fake It Sometimes (00:21:43)
13. Jared Leto Lookalike Was a Dud in Bed (00:25:29)
14. Etty’s Rule About Oral Sex (00:26:36)
15. Trust + Safety = Vulnerability Which Can Lead to Orgasm (00:28:37)
16. Porn’s Disservice to Female Orgasms (00:29:23)
17. Sex is a Place You Can Go Together (00:30:21)
18. There Needs To Be Less Shame Regarding Sex (00:31:27)
19. Peggy Ornstein Relating Giving Blow Jobs to Fetching Lattes For Boys (00:32:23)
20. The Biggest Orgasms Almost Always Happen with Other People (00:33:36)
21. What If There Weren’t Babies Without Female Orgasms? (00:36:39)
22. Multiple Orgasms (00:37:30)
23. Mind the Gap (00:39:07)
24. Love Yourself & Strive To Become a Whole Person (00:40:01)
25. Sign-Off And How To Reach Us (00:41:12)
17 episodes