[PODCAST 307]: Building Courage to Begin Again

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[PODCAST 307]: Building Courage to Begin Again

4d ago 21:22

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Have you ever felt like life hit the “restart” button—sometimes by choice, sometimes not?

Maybe it’s been a health challenge, a new phase of life, or just a deep fatigue that makes it hard to finish what you start.

Today, I want to share a few stories from our community and talk about how we can keep going when life asks us to begin again. One of my favorite things is reading emails, comments, or posts from our LearnDoBecome community members.

Sometimes they come with the energy of a restart: One member shared, “Super excited to be here! Elementary teacher, wife, and mother to a 2-year-old and a 5-year-old. I have been in STEP Mastery for several years, but started out just implementing a few things here and there. I benefited immensely from what I implemented, but have realized the value of the whole command central in recent years. I’ve been trying to gain momentum for quite a while now to actually redo the program, but the baby years and some unexpected health challenges kept setting me back. Super excited to try again.”

Sometimes it’s a major life transition–like this member who said, “I found the STEP program a few years ago…. I’m in a new phase of life (divorce will be finalized this month and I’m starting up a side-passion as well). Anyway, this seems like a good time to restart STEP, so here I am…”

I also really appreciate when our members open their hearts. A recent example of this said, “I’ve hit an emotional block to finishing anything, specifically my STEP program. This is about as far as I got 5 years ago my first time through the program, too. It’s almost like I’m close to achieving what I’ve been working toward and I stop short because I don’t know what’s ahead. I’m not afraid of success or fearful of the unknown. It kind of feels like I’m fundamentally changing me and I’m not sure I know how to accept that. I have such exciting future plans that I want to build and I just can’t get there. I’ve been trying to be really intentional and kind with myself. But, I’ve completely stalled. I’m on the couch catching up on nothing important more than I’d like these days.”

She went on to open up about which part of the program she is on, and what kinds of things have been happening in her life, and the group offered some support and encouragement.

I bring all of these up because there are so many complicated feelings and experiences going on behind the scenes for all of us, and I want to acknowledge them today and offer some hope if you’re in the middle of something challenging, as well.

For example, in that first example, our STEPper said these 12 words: “the baby years and some unexpected health challenges kept setting me back.” That’s a great way to describe a period of life, but those 12 words hold a lot of untold stories. Perhaps you also know how it feels to desperately want to create order or move forward on necessary projects, but you know you need to put those things on hold because another life–or multiple lives–depend on you. And when you add “health challenges” into the equation, it makes it even harder.

I know many in our community have spent years dealing with pain, exhaustion, hospital visits, and everything that goes along with that. I’ve personally been through both the baby years and lots of unexpected health challenges, and I know that “getting organized” can feel like a mountain ahead of you that you’ll never overcome. Just getting out of bed, feeding everyone, and keeping the laundry going can max you out.

In the second example I shared, there were 6 words, “divorce will be finalized this month,” and while divorce is sadly a common occurrence, there’s nothing “common” about the pain that I’m sure she has been going through. Several of my best friends and close family members have gone through divorce, and no matter how amiable they try to make it, the details are never easy. It takes a lot of bravery to move forward.

In the third example I shared, I want to highlight these 19 words: “It kind of feels like I’m fundamentally changing me and I’m not sure I know how to accept that.” I feel like this could be its own separate episode. It’s true–anytime we decide we’re going to rise above our past challenges and create a future we love, a change has to take place. And when we’re going for a true transformation, the changes are not superficial, they are definitely fundamental.

There’s a common theme in these 3 messages: they’re all moving forward, reaching out for connection, and deciding that their futures can be even happier than their pasts. So why am I recording this podcast? What message do I want to share with you today, if you happen to be in a transition point, as well?

First, I want to send my love. It takes a lot of courage to show up for yourself, and if you’re here at LearnDoBecome, it’s because there’s something inside that’s calling you forward–and you’ve chosen to answer the call, when it would be so easy to ignore it or numb it with distractions. That deserves some major acknowledgement.

Second, I want you to know we’re here at LearnDoBecome because we believe in you. We’re not professional organizers who come to your home and clean it up for you. We’re not just “running a business” and trying to sell a bunch of products. We’re fellow travelers and friends who want to offer simple tools and systems so you can lift yourself out of the mess or the overwhelm or the indecision that has been paralyzing you and create a life where you wake up excited and go to bed content.

A recent comment came in from Angela on Episode 305 of the podcast. In our discussion with Sharon Eubank, author of the book Doing Small Things with Great Love, I had mentioned our trip building a school in Kenya with Village Impact and how that was a “big” thing, but that most of my work, particularly serving here at LearnDoBecome feels like it isn’t making that big of an influence because it is so much easier for me than traveling internationally. But then Angela shared this:

“April – I just wanted to share what I was thinking about as you were wrapping up the podcast…. I got to thinking that what you are doing is the step before the school, program, etc. You are helping your community to bring order to chaos SO THAT we can GO and do the things that God has uniquely gifted us to do. Imagine the impact you are having as you teach us how to build and maintain order. How many projects are ACTUALLY getting done because of the principles that you teach. How many schools are being built, programs being designed and lives being changed because of what we have learned. What you are doing is “teaching us to fish” so that our minds and lives are open to use the skills we have been created with to go and make an impact in the world around us. So, for that – thank you.”

I shared it with Eric, and he said, “That may have been one of the best comments you’ve ever received.” And I don’t say this to pat myself on the back or anything. I just want you to know that the reason I’m here–trying to love you and strengthen you through this online community is because I believe in what you are going to create. I remember how overwhelming my life felt before I built my Command Central (or my STEP System–or whatever you want to call it!). I remember feeling so mentally exhausted, so frustrated, and so crazy. I was taking care of all these little children and helping with PTA and serving in my church and working with my husband to navigate a career path that actually worked for our family.

Most of my prayers during that time were me simply pleading to God to help me know what to do so I could feel peace. So I could get out of the hole I felt I was in. So I could actually live with purpose and not be worried about my super long to-do list that never really solved the deepest problems we were facing.

And now that I’m out of that hole and out of that overwhelm, I just can’t stand the thought of anyone living in it when I know the way out. I’ve had to learn to temper myself, to work at a sustainable pace, and to create systems for all of this so my team and I don’t burn out–but we’re here because we know it’s going to make a difference for you like it has for us.

The third thing I want to share today are just a few things you can do right now to start making progress. There are some practical things–like getting our Welcome Kit at LearnDoBecome.com/Welcome, which features some simple tutorials and resources that will train you on our Steps to Everyday Productivity method, but here are some additional thoughts that will hopefully give you a lift:

Lower your expectations. I know this feels counterintuitive, but for you perfectionists and overachievers (yes, I can see you!), there is so much power in this. If you actually sat down and recorded everything you’re currently expecting of yourself–and then if you posted it to social media and asked if anyone wanted to take on that job description, would anyone apply? Does that thought make you laugh? We’re so hard on ourselves, but the truth is that when we expect less of ourselves, we end up with energy to do more.

I’ve said over and over again that short lists get done, so please–do everything you can to shorten your lists. You likely have 50 projects written down that you’re trying to do right now–plus 37 hidden projects you’re doing that you never did write down.

Inside our Welcome Kit, there’s a video training to help you focus your Current Projects List on just a few that will serve you the best. Work in pre-planned microbursts. Those are 10-minute, focused working sessions where you do the next action related to a project.

For the community member mentioned above in my third example who was having trouble finishing the STEP program, I asked if she’d just read or watched the whole program without implementing it–so she could wrap her head around the whole thing. She replied, “That is one of the ‘just do something’ tasks I’m trying to get done. Just watch/read the modules to see what’s ahead. I then find every reason to not do it. My biggest ‘reason’ is that it’s the end of the day and I just don’t feel like learning anything else today. That’s dumb!! What cop out!”

Then I replied, “I don’t think that is a cop-out at all. Fatigue is a real thing. What do you think about lowering your expectations and making it easy on yourself? Have your computer already logged in and ready to go—and commit to just 10 minutes before wind-down time. Or log in from your phone and do 10 minutes of STEP in the bathtub. Something easy so you don’t feel like you have to ‘gear up’?”

She then said, “I think you are on to something! Almost like putting your workout gear on so you are ready to workout whether you want to or not. If I have my laptop open, loaded in, and at the ready, the first 3 actions are done.”

If there’s something big you’re putting off right now, what is the very next 10-minute task you could do to move that forward? And how could you make it easy to do that? Weave a whole new cloth. I know this one sounds weird, but it’s a powerful concept I learned from Shad Helmstetter’s book, The Power of Neuroplasticity. Seriously, this is one of my new favorites. He teaches the science behind positive self-talk, and he shares that when we are building a new version of ourselves by changing the way we think, we aren’t just taking a piece of old cloth and fashioning it into something different. We’re creating a whole new cloth. I love this idea.

We don’t have to carry our old habits, our past mistakes, or our former wiring into our futures. All the pain, resentment, anger, suffering, and trauma can stay in the past. We each get to choose, today, to tell a different story and to create a life where we can use our unique talents and gifts to bless others. Sometimes our humanness feels like such a weight. But I believe the world has never needed our humanness more. You know that there is good inside you that is just waiting to be unlocked.

If you didn’t feel that, you wouldn’t be here at LearnDoBecome. Our STEP program and our ARISE community are here, if you want to work with us on a more personal level and get step-by-step training and support. Or if you’d prefer to enjoy our free content and dabble in some of the concepts we teach, that’s great, too! Just make sure you sign up for the Welcome Kit at LearnDoBecome.com/Welcome so you can be connected to us.

We love you, and we are cheering you on!

Now, to close up, I’m excited to share 3 fun Community Testimonials!

Krissy wrote, “Just finished Module 4. Feels good to have my space clear and organized. Using my computer bag as my temporary mobile command center. (Use what you’ve got, right?) Excited to incorporate the flow chart when going through my doom piles when I get home. Hoping establishing some good habits now will help when I get back to the chaos of reality.”

The following 3 images and quotes come from Patty: