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Retrograde Amnesia Podcasts

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A chapter by chapter, beat by beat analysis of classic Japanese Roleplaying Games (JRPG). We delve deep into the story, dialogue, game mechanics, music, influences, and themes. We've covered Xenogears, Chrono Cross, Final Fantasy VIII, Suikoden, Suikoden II, Xenosaga Episode I, Final Fantasy Tactics, and Lunar: Silver Star Story Complete. Yes, we will kill god.
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Has anyone told you that you’re gorgeous? It’s true, as obvious as when we’re rolling a turd, suffering a pincer attack, wishing there were anime in an anime moment, yanking off nipples, adapting dragon technology, vowing to stop a cretin, stumbling into a fairy garden, chafing at a wicked manner, laying off the goblin workforce, shopping at Home D…
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What kind of hero are you if you can’t protect my balloons? Apparently the kind that likes suppressing emotion, drunken-smacking monsters, witnessing a death plunge, wondering where home is, making wings out of fluffy bugs, committing a modern hate crime, spiraling through Paxton/Pullman delirium, losing the power to firm and tone, moving into an e…
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This is not the time to get freaky. Ears can’t even do that, but they can hear us resting in a slumber of our design, witnessing a world history event, birthing the Grindery, thinking of the Death Star workers, combining steam with magic, yearning for the True Power of Vane, using a super move reluctantly, testing the limits of forgiveness, working…
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This is not a place of contention. It’s a place of listening, and learning while we’re removing the lesbians, damseling workers, assuring the quality of our plumbing, destroying a different black dragon, growing dirt guys, talking to eggs, waiting for a heel to turn face, requiring god juice to live, seeking Althena’s light, understanding the gobli…
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What’s up pixel perverts? Today we’re blighting the surface for undesirables, rapidly switching discs, realizing the guards can hit, scraping metal out of the dirt, locating the only doctor in the world, experiencing goblin poetry, refusing to serve drinks to miners, dreaming of D Block, goofing into a slur, beating the prisoners, staring down a mo…
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You’re prisoners of foolish ambition. You’re consumers of the pod, an episode in which we’re smelling so sweetly, waiting for Kyle to say it, finally realizing what we should have known, using ass-beating thoughts as a coping mechanism, fighting out of duty, living in the present, becoming a character, deploying a maximally appropriate sound effect…
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Mutant League Football and Mutant League Hockey were convergence points across gross out children’s toys, gratuitous video game violence, and those who dared to dream up sports games for kids who weren’t especially interested in sports. But is it bad when the toilet produces more than it consumes? Eric thought about this for the last five months. I…
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I wanna see some skull. Down in that bone zone, we’re coming up with magic city protection spells, wearing villain attire, contemplating infinity, making mother look so afraid, seeking the emasculation of self, crying in baby poop, dropping trou, becoming an honorary citizen of Lann, wearing an everybody magnet, loving Whitney Houston, building mac…
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Shut your sass hole, buddy. From our sass holes we bequeath denying god’s light from the Frontier, showing off our new clothes to everyone in the world, learning more about Alex’s Dad’s Son’s Sister Girlfriend, failing to show love in action, doing weird shit with butter and rubber bands, foreshadowing Nash via doomerism, continuing the denture sag…
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What man who desires to be a hero would let that happen? Us, obviously. We’re bleeding out of the neck, dealing with Not My First Mind Control, tempting in the desert, saying Alex and Luna over and over, screaming into Dragon Master gear (in anime), wearing an invisible sprite hat, indulging in dragon controller irony, supposing dragons are real, c…
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Graveyard duck, give me the bag. Inside of this bag you can find us feeling the magic, repeatedly getting lost in the forest, spriting a tree differently, receiving PSP-exclusive Nash backstory, dreaming bloody murder, parting bushes like the red sea, debating the existence of god with children, learning of the nomadic lifestyle, spreading disease,…
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The time is at hand to prove the worth of your way. We’ll do that by wishing Laike was plausibly nerfed, fearing a bad lore tower, navigating pipes and catwalks, throwing shit out of a magic hat, playing fart sounds, bullying our way into a second airship, buzzing around like a turd-sick gnat, yanking on a face, foreshadowing a betrayal, enforcing …
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No place is safe these days. Not even a podcast, unless we’re attempting to define a dragon’s lair, animating Phacia’s sprite, realizing the bad guys want to kill god, crying at the amusement park, disappointing father, impressing mother, living in the cave forever, taking a dirt nap, threatening a corpse stomp, launching surprise arrows, stonewall…
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Is there a reason for these kinds of guys? Podcasters? Guys who are correcting a your/you’re situation, reminding teenagers of their mortality, speculating the origin of hole floor dungeons, banging blowing and flicking, eliminating drag references, actually fixing a town, poking dead monsters with a stick, singing songs between two lovers, telepor…
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I’m so hot to trot right now. Stay cool while we’re entering a spinning picture cut-scene, falling out of the sky, stealing crashed balloon parts, disregarding mortality, beating perverted slime balls, attempting a ritual, shitting on a tradesman, regretting the fool mirror purchase, choosing bow or cane, producing kindergartener music, simulating …
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Why don’t you come with me? I’m going to take us to a cool place…a podcast. In such a place we’re becoming a Thieves Guild member, recalling petty crime stories, developing a third ulcer, spanking another bottom, maintaining the fortune teller bit, calling Ramus a “chuckoid,” handing over the blueprints, indulging in floating bug science, encouragi…
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Knowledge is meaningless if it’s not shared with others. Just like podcasts, especially when we’re possessing the cornerstone that may become the foundation, confirming remastered butt crack, procuring special knowledge, wishing we were playing N.A.R.C., gaining entrance, neglecting typo correction in the remaster, loving pop quizzes, testing the p…
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You will live forever. And you will never be alone…as long as you’re listening to us fancying a brain lick, nailing non-relatives, regrettably identifying with Nash, pissing wickedly, joshin’ guys, biologically challenging a pervert, referencing “♫♫ diarrhea ♫♫ diarrhea ♫♫,” getting secret words in a notebook, smelling like booze, wetting a pig tro…
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Let the scrubbing commence. Once clean, we’re deploying a burgle, only robbing the rich folks, assuming Reza’s city planners were children, reading the big book of suckers, imagining “podcasting town,” falling off a high horse, tangling undergarments, giving up all passions, becoming the next Chutney Dallas, looping family trees like clover, purify…
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This is the perfect time to be drinking. With your ears. To us designing secret behavior oppression systems, using outdated language, concentrating blue hair divinity, baking “nookie cookies,” wolf whistling a queen, remembering Barney violence, realizing she’s jailbait, finally referencing Seinfeld, bumping off, getting rid of the magic gimp, chew…
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When I want your opinion, I’ll give it to you…in the form of a podcast, where we’re suffering cursed mask after effects, removing a reference to childbirth, grossly misinterpreting “girl group,” requiring Nash’s friendship, setting out on a Dragon Quest, sleeping with the fishes, panty raiding, listening to ABBA all day long, reading a diary to go …
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Are you being able to look into my brain magically? Are you able to ear listen to us yearning for days of wine and song, creating a Hot Rod situation, making sure this Bud’s for you, speaking with bad grammar, calling dad by his first name, focusing on the world of nature, staying in the closet, ogling stuff we don’t need, establishing the prescien…
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Down here, it doesn’t matter. Down here, we’re loving when a town turns into a dungeon, keeping the Ramus Shop vibes intact, starting a signal fire, CAPITALIZING words ARBITRARILY, ethically debating nude fortune telling, yacking all over shoes, asking for booze, screaming like a cat in heat, frying bastards alive, exploring tomato broiling technol…
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It’s painful when the memories return too suddenly. It’s less painful when we’re stealing villagers for mining work, blowing up a tombstone, revealing Chris’ ultimate weirdo secret, counting action figures, seeding rumors of a beautiful singer, shaking the faith of the faithful, extracting lore from the library, taking over the world for non-sexual…
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I have so many frightening dreams these days. You have so many Lunar podcasts. This one’s got us getting villainously angry at Dyne’s Monument, locating a prescient Burg resident, being last beheld, refusing to forgive a loss-causing world, sending in the clowns, executing the perfect anime betrayal, speculating jokerification points, staring a dra…
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