Best Dr Justin Lehmiller Podcasts (2025)

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Episode 368: What We Get Wrong About Relationships 31:44

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8M ago31:44

31:44

A lot of the things you’ve probably learned about what healthy relationships look like are just plain wrong. In today’s show, we’re going to dive into what you really need to know. Some of the topics we’re going to explore include how to know whether a given relationship is right for you, how to avoid moving too fast, and the single best things you…

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Episode 367: Five Things Everybody Can Learn From Kink 33:32

8M ago33:32

33:32

Whether you consider yourself to be kinky or not, there’s a lot that all of us can learn from the kink community that could benefit our sex lives. Today, we’re going to explore five important things to know about cultivating safer, healthier, and more pleasurable sexual experiences. Along the way, we’re also going to dispel some common misconceptio…

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Episode 366: Sexual Fantasies Across Cultures 37:00

8M ago37:00

37:00

If you’re a long-time listener, you’ve probably heard me talk about my study abroad classes before. I take students all over the world to learn about sex and culture, and one of the many topics we explore is sexual fantasies, including how they are similar or different across cultures. For example, in my Amsterdam course, we hear from Marielle de G…

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Episode 365: Men’s Anxiety Around Sex and Dating 25:34

8M ago25:34

25:34

Research finds that up to 25% of men experience sexual performance anxiety, which is just one of many types of anxiety that affect men in the bedroom. In this episode, we’re diving into men’s anxiety around sex and relationships, and how to deal with it. I am joined once again by David Khalili, a licensed marriage and family therapist, board-certif…

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Episode 364: Men’s Mental Health 27:58

8M ago27:58

27:58

A growing number of men are experiencing mental health struggles. However, surveys from all around the world find that men are very reluctant to talk about their mental health. As a result, their mental health issues often go undiagnosed and untreated, and many turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms. In today’s show, we’re going to open up a conversat…

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Episode 363: Sex In The Movies 55:47

8M ago55:47

55:47

When it comes to how sex and sexuality are portrayed on screen, what does Hollywood get right and wrong? Let’s talk about it! I recently appeared on the Love Factually Podcast, hosted by my friends Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel. They asked me to select a film about sex, so I picked the 2010 movie Easy A starring Emma Stone. We had a really fun conve…

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Episode 362: Sex Questions We’ve Never Been Asked Before (Listener Questions) 37:01

8M ago37:01

37:01

We are answering more of your sex questions in this show! We had a couple of fascinating questions that came through our listener voicemail that really stood out to me because I’ve never been asked about them before: Our first question is about what to do with sex toys you don’t want or need anymore. Can you recycle them? The answer is surprisingly…

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Episode 361: Navigating Age-Gap Relationships (Listener Questions) 36:15

8M ago36:15

36:15

In today’s show, we are answering more of your sex questions! We recently had two questions come through our podcast voicemail that center around navigating relationships where the partners are significantly different in terms of age, so that’s what we’re going to be talking about in this show. To help me in answering these questions, Ashley Weller…

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Episode 360: What’s Your Love Language? 32:19

8M ago32:19

32:19

“The Five Love Languages” is one of the most popular self-help books on relationships ever written, and it’s often used in couples’ therapy. However, despite its massive popularity, there’s a surprising lack of research on the theory behind it. My guest today recently published a new study that tested some of its core ideas, and the findings may ve…

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Episode 359: Are You Having “Good Enough” Sex? 26:01

9M ago26:01

26:01

Sexual problems are common. So how do we fix them? In today’s episode, we’re going to dive into the Good Enough Sex Model. It’s a radically different way of thinking about sex that can help us both in preventing problems from emerging in the first place, as well as fixing problems when they appear. My guest is Dr. Barry McCarthy. He is an emeritus …

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Episode 358: Resolutions for Thriving Relationships (Essential Listen) 32:53

9M ago32:53

32:53

Now is the perfect time to make some resolutions for healthy relationships in the New Year! In previous year-end episodes, we covered sexual resolutions (see episodes 155 and 253), so in this show, we’re going to focus on relationship resolutions. We’ll be talking about tips for making new friends, strengthening romantic relationships, and building…

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Episode 357: Navigating ADHD and Sex 44:03

9M ago44:03

44:03

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a topic that is rarely discussed in terms of how it affects adults’ intimate lives, but it’s something we need to talk about. Research suggests that around 40% of adults with ADHD experience at least one form of sexual dysfunction. In today’s show, we’re going to explore what you need to know about…

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Episode 356: Why Holiday Romance Movies Are So Popular 24:59

9M ago24:59

24:59

Over the last couple of decades, holiday movies have increasingly centered around love and romance, and they’re growing massively in popularity. In this episode, we’re going to dive into the rise of romance-themed holiday media and how this intersects with cuffing season, or the increased tendency for people to partner-up during the winter months. …

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Episode 355: The Rise of Sentient Object Romance 45:08

9M ago45:08

45:08

“Sentient object romance” is an increasingly popular erotica genre in which humans get ravished by inanimate objects that come to life. Some of the most wonderfully absurd titles I’ve seen in this area include “Glazed by the Gay Living Donuts” and “This Pumpkin Spice Latte Gets Me Off.” In today’s show, we’re going to explore the appeal of sentient…

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Episode 354: Why Gay Men Have a Higher Risk of Erectile Dysfunction 36:31

9M ago36:31

36:31

Research has found that gay men are substantially more likely to experience erectile dysfunction than heterosexual men, whereas heterosexual men are more likely to experience premature ejaculation than gay men. So what’s up with that? In this episode, we’re going dive into the science that can help to explain this curious pattern, as well as discus…

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Episode 353: Dating And Relationship Tips For Gay Men 38:48

9M ago38:48

38:48

Most relationship advice is tailored to heterosexual folks. And while some of that is also applicable queer relationships, not all of it is. Queer relationships are unique and therefore need relationship advice that’s tailored to them. My guest today has a forthcoming book that offers a relationship guide for gay men, so that’s what we’re going to …

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Episode 352: Inside the World of Financial Domination 37:59

9M ago37:59

37:59

Financial domination or findom involves a submissive (usually a man) who gives money or control of their finances to a dominant partner (usually a woman). The sub is not expecting anything in return—it’s about submitting, giving up control, sometimes being humiliated, and being aroused by all of this. So why are people into findom, and why does it …

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Episode 351: The Pornification of America 28:48

10M ago28:48

28:48

These days, it seems like sex is everywhere you look. We live in a very pornified culture in many ways, but it wasn’t always like this. So what changed? In today’s show, we’re going to explore the rise of “raunch culture.” Some of the topics we’ll discuss include the effects of living in a hypersexualized society, the mixed messages that women rece…

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Episode 350: The Rise of Sugar Dating 31:50

10M ago31:50

31:50

Sugar dating typically involves an older, wealthy person who financially supports a younger, attractive partner in exchange for companionship and intimacy, and sometimes sex. In today’s episode, we’re going to explore the growing popularity of sugar dating and the unique grey area that it occupies in between traditional dating and sex work. My gues…

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Episode 349: What Movies Get Right (And Wrong) About Relationships 40:36

10M ago40:36

40:36

Romantic comedies are one of the most popular film genres. But how accurate are rom-coms in the way they portray sex, love, and relationships? My guests today are the hosts of a new podcast that uses the science of relationships to separate fact from fiction in some of the biggest rom-coms of all time. We’re going to explore some of the things that…

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Episode 348: How To Stay Sexually Healthy Your Entire Life 33:34

10M ago33:34

33:34

Our sexuality is something that evolves and changes over time. However, traditional sex education does a poor job of preparing us for those changes. In today’s show, we’re going to talk about how to stay sexually healthy for your entire life. We’re going to explore what people at different stages of life need to know, why maintaining sexual health …

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Episode 347: How To Improve Your Sexual Communication Skills 33:30

10M ago33:30

33:30

Most of us recognize how important sexual communication is, yet we still struggle with it. In today’s show, we’re going to discuss a practical framework for improving your sexual communication skills. It’s called the STARS method. Using this technique will help you and your partner(s) to better understand each other and lay the groundwork for hot a…

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Episode 346: What You Don’t Know About the Clitoris 32:24

10M ago32:24

32:24

The clitoris is a piece of anatomy that has repeatedly been discovered, described, and forgotten. In today’s show, we’re going to dive into the history of the clitoris and what you need to know about it. We’ll also explore whether there’s really a difference between clitoral and vaginal orgasms, the surprising role of testosterone in clitoral healt…

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Episode 345: Secrets of the Vulva 38:18

10M ago38:18

38:18

The vulva is one of the most misunderstood pieces of sexual anatomy. So in today’s show, we’re going to talk about what you don’t know about the vulva. Among other things, we’ll discuss the lifespan of the vulva, the importance of maintaining vulvar health, and how sex education is failing us all when it comes to understanding the vulva. My guest i…

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Episode 344: The Surprising History of Kink, Porn, and Fetishes 31:21

10M ago31:21

31:21

For as long as humans have been having sex, they’ve been having kinky sex. So let’s talk about our kinky history and how it can help us to better understand sexuality today. In this episode, we’re going to explore the roots of a number of popular fetishes, including leather, nylon, and feet. We’re also going to talk about the history of porn, inclu…

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Episode 343: The Fascinating History Of Sex Toys 31:20

10M ago31:20

31:20

Sex toys are far from a modern invention. Humans have actually been making them for millennia! So let’s dive into the fascinating history of sex toys. In today’s show, we’ll tell you about the oldest dildo ever discovered, the true story behind the invention of the vibrator, and so much more. I am joined by Esmé Louise James, who is best known for …

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Episode 342: The Secret To Cultivating Passion 29:25

11M ago29:25

29:25

How do you create a lasting connection with a partner and sustain passion in a relationship over time? In today’s show, we’re going to discuss the secrets you need to know for cultivating hotter and healthier sex lives. By following these tips, you can learn to have the kind of sex that we all really want to be having, which is where it feels almos…

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Episode 341: How To Stop Feeling Distracted During Sex 30:35

11M ago30:35

30:35

One of the most common sex problems people report today is that they can’t seem to clear their mind during sex. They find themselves distracted or they’re multi-tasking, and this is getting in the way of their pleasure. In today’s show, we’re going to discuss why this problem is on the rise and what we can do about it. Specifically, we’re going to …

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Episode 340: Is Social Media Ruining Dating? 37:38

11M ago37:38

37:38

Social media has permeated many aspects of our lives, including our intimate lives. In today’s show, we’re going to discuss the good, bad, and ugly of how social media has changed dating. Some of the topics we explore include how social media can stoke relationship insecurity and undermine authentic connection, as well as why social media is increa…

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Episode 339: How Gen Z Is Redefining Sex and Relationships 34:25

11M ago34:25

34:25

What do young adults today want from sex and relationships? And how is this different compared to generations past? To answer these questions, we’re going to dive into The State of Dating Report, a collaborative scientific analysis from the Kinsey Institute and Feeld, the dating app for the curious. We’re going to discuss why younger adults are hav…

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Episode 338: The Science of Libido, Orgasm, and Desire (Listener Questions) 21:21

11M ago21:21

21:21

In today’s show, we’re answering more of your sex questions! This is our third dive into some of the questions that have come through our listener voicemail. I’m going to answer three of them that I thought were super interesting. Our first question is about whether libido is genetically determined, so we’ll look at what the science says about the …

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Episode 337: Understanding Women’s Sexual Desire (Essential Listen) 40:44

11M ago40:44

40:44

Sexual desire is complex. Scientists can’t even agree on a definition of it, let alone whether and how it is distinct from arousal. In today’s show, we’re going to revisit one of my favorite conversations of all time on the show, which offers a deep dive into the science behind women’s sexual desire. Some of the topics we’ll discuss include how to …

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Episode 336: Not Having Sex Is The Latest Sex Trend 35:30

11M ago35:30

35:30

A growing number of people seem to be hitting the pause button on their sex lives, which is why terms like “volcel” (short for voluntary celibacy) and “boysober” are trending on social media. So what’s this all about? Why is not having sex the hot new sex trend? Let’s talk about it. In today’s show, we’re going to explore the rise of voluntary celi…

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Episode 335: How To Have Good Sex 33:12

11M ago33:12

33:12

If you had to define “good sex” in just three words, what would they be? In today’s show, we’re going to talk about the key things that come to mind when people are asked this question. There are 20 common responses to this, which constitute the main ingredients of the kind of sex we all want to be having. We’re going to dive into some of those ing…

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Episode 334: How To Have A Happy Vagina 37:03

12M ago37:03

37:03

Many women don’t know what they really need to know about maintaining good vaginal health, which leads some of them to turn to products and practices that might do more harm than good. So in today’s show, we’re going to discuss how to have a happy and healthy vagina. Specifically, we’ll explore how your lifestyle impacts your vaginal health, how to…

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Episode 333: What It’s Like To Have Sex On Psychedelics 39:50

12M ago39:50

39:50

Psychedelic use is at an all-time high among young adults. These drugs are used for many purposes, but often for sex. So let’s talk about “trippy” sex. In this episode, we’re going to discuss the sexual effects of several common psychedelics, the potential benefits and risks of these drugs, and what people who wish to combine sex and substances nee…

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Episode 332: How Cannabis Affects Sex 32:14

12M ago32:14

32:14

A lot of people consume cannabis prior to sexual activity. But how exactly does cannabis affect sex, and what do you need to know about it? In today’s show, we’re going to dive into what the research says about how cannabis affects men’s and women’s sexual function and performance, the problems with a lot of the research on sex and cannabis, why ca…

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Episode 331: The Surprising Intimacy of Bromances 32:45

12M ago32:45

32:45

“Bromance” is a term that is often used to describe close friendships between men. These relationships contain elements of emotional intimacy, but physical intimacy may occur as well, such as cuddling. Sometimes there’s even a sexual component, such as when two male friends participate in a threesome together. In today’s show, we’re going to discus…

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Episode 330: The Science of Kink 29:15

12M ago29:15

29:15

What does it really mean to be “kinky?” It can be difficult to say because kink is a subjective term that means different things to different people. Kink can also be a fantasy, a practice, or even an identity. It’s time for a new way of thinking about kink that can capture all of this complexity. In today’s show, we’re going to explore the brand n…

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Episode 329: Monogamy? In This Economy? 29:54

12M ago29:54

29:54

When romantic partners move in together, something they need to figure out is how to manage their finances. Will your money be shared or separate? And who will pay for what? These conversations can be tricky to navigate in general, but they become even more complex when you have multiple partners. In today’s episode, we’re going to dive into money …

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Episode 328: Tips For Living With Multiple Partners 36:11

1y ago36:11

36:11

If you’ve never lived with multiple partners before, figuring out how to navigate this kind of situation can pose some challenges. For example, how do you determine where everyone will sleep? How do you navigate things like personal space, chores, and scheduling conflicts? In today’s show, we’re going to discuss practical tips on cultivating happy …

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Episode 327: Sex Tips for Men 32:25

1y ago32:25

32:25

We discussed sex tips for women in the previous episode, so today we have some tips for the guys. Some of the topics we’ll discuss include how to have stronger erections, what you need to know if you’re concerned about your penis size, as well as how to increase sexual pleasure. We’re also going to discuss common sexual concerns men have and how to…

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Episode 326: Sex Tips For Women 33:20

1y ago33:20

33:20

Female sexual pleasure is a topic that is not often covered in traditional sex education. In fact, it’s extraordinarily rare for the word “clitoris” to even be mentioned in sex ed! The unfortunate result is that many women (and their partners) never learn the information they really need to know. In today’s show, we’re diving into the sex ed you ne…

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Episode 325: Sex on Trial – Tales of an Expert Witness 49:53

1y ago49:53

49:53

Sex educators and researchers are often called upon to serve as expert witnesses in legal proceedings. This is particularly true in cases that center around kink or BDSM, consensual non-monogamy, and sexual or gender minorities. The job of the experts is to help judges and juries better understand the sexual issues at hand. In today’s show, I’m goi…

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Episode 324: How To Get What You Want In Bed 32:43

1y ago32:43

32:43

A lot of us aren’t getting what we really want in bed. For example, there might be certain positions, activities, or techniques that you prefer or enjoy, but you aren’t quite sure how to ask for them. So in today’s show, we’re going to talk about how to get more of what you want. Some of the topics we’ll explore include practical tips for sharing y…

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Episode 323: The Most Common Sex Fights, And How To Solve Them 34:03

1y ago34:03

34:03

Sexual conflict is inevitable in long-term relationships. It’s virtually impossible for partners to always be erotically in synch with one another at all times over the course of many years together. That’s why everyone fights about sex from time to time. In today’s show, we’re going to explore the most common sexual conflicts that arise in long-te…

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Episode 322: Why Bisexuality Is On The Rise 33:58

1y ago33:58

33:58

Today, more people identify as LGBTQ+ than ever before. However, this is largely due to a big increase in the number of persons identifying as bisexual. So in this episode, we’re going to dive into a recent study published in The Journal of Sex Research that investigates the rise in bisexuality over time. We’ll discuss different ways of defining an…

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Episode 321: Penis Problems, And How To Fix Them 32:40

1y ago32:40

32:40

The penis doesn’t always do what you want it to do. For example, sometimes you might want an erection but can’t get one, or maybe you’ll reach orgasm faster than you’d like. These things happen. But when does a penis problem cross the line into becoming a sexual difficulty in need of treatment? That’s what we’re going to be exploring today. We’re g…

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Episode 320: What You Don’t Know About The Penis 35:52

1y ago35:52

35:52

How much do you know about the penis? You may think you already know everything there is to know, but you probably don’t. That’s why today’s episode is going to dive into what you don’t know about the penis. Some of the topics we’re going to cover include the immense variability that exists in penile sensitivity and sensation, as well as what we kn…

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Episode 319: The Bogus BDSM Legal Defense 36:41

1y ago36:41

36:41

Was it consensual kink or sexual abuse? This question is at the heart of a growing number of legal cases. Unfortunately, people sometimes try to claim consensual kink as a cover for sexual violence, a trend my guest today refers to as “the bogus BDSM defense.” In this show, we’re going to dive into a few recent cases where the bogus BDSM defense ha…