Best Teddy Steinkellner Podcasts (2025)

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2017 Movie Awards: The Teddies and the Jakies

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7+ y ago

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What was the scariest moment in a movie this year? Who was the most typecast actor? Which film was the most overrated? It's time to hand out the only movie awards that matter: the Teddies and the Jakies! Teddy welcomes Jake Longstreth back onto New Rankings to celebrate the very best films of 2017 (and also The Book of Henry, and also 47 Meters Dow…

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Top 10 Movies of 2017 with Kevin Best

7+ y ago

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Teddy welcomes back New Rankings film correspondent and James-Cameron-action-figure owner Kevin Best (Sequel Rewrite podcast) for a James-Cameron-movie-length discussion of the top 10 movies of 2017. Some of the films discussed include Coco, Logan, Kedi, Get Out, some cannibal movie that Kevin liked, The Florida Project, the season finale of Nathan…

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Top 10 Fashion Trends We Want to See in 2018 with Emma

7+ y ago

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Teddy got a new hat, and it's all he really wants to talk about anymore. On this New Rankings, he welcomes Emma back to predict the top ten hottest fashion trends of 2018, but mostly they just admire his hat. Additional topics of discussion include: the shockingly sustained relevance of the Big Dog brand, the "Coachella meets Renaissance Fair" look…

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FANTASY DRAFT! Fictional Football Teams with Jake

7+ y ago

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Are you ready for some footbaw??? Just in time for the NFL playoffs (playoffs?!), Teddy welcomes his best man Jake Longstreth back onto New Rankings to draft their best fictional football squads, comprised of players from such classic gridiron tales as The Replacements, Friday Night Lights, Remember the Titans, and the Garbage Picking Field Goal Ki…

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Top 7 Books We Read in 2017 with Kit

8y ago

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Happy 2018! Teddy welcomes his sister, noted bookworm Kit Steinkellner, back onto the New Rankings Book Club to count down their top 7 reads from 2017. Along the way, they give insight into their favorite literary genres: depressing politics books and "trashy thrillers" for Teddy; Asian women fiction and monster dog stories for Kit. In addition, th…

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Top 10 Santas with Lindsey

8y ago

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Ho, ho, ho! On this episode of Yule Rankings, Teddy welcomes back Lindsey Toiaivao as they celebrate everyone's favorite holiday mascot-slash-horny dad, Santa Claus! Lindsey and Teddy rank their top ten Santas in film, fiction, and folklore, from Krampus to the Grinch, from Tim Allen to JTT. Additional pressing Santa questions include: Why is Jack …

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Top 10 Fictional Families with Emma

8y ago

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With the holidays approaching -- and with their childhood home facing the threat of a terrifying wildfire -- Teddy and Emma take a moment to count their blessings, Berenstain Bears-style, and rank their top ten fictional families ever. Some of the ohanas on their lists include: the Corleones, the Chipmunks, the Lannisters, the Brady Bunch, the Koop…

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Top 8 Ways to Keep That Bro Bond with Molina

8y ago

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Who dem boys? *WE* dem boys! In this testosterone-fueled episode (recorded live from a boycation in Houston, Texas!), Teddy and his eternal bro Andrew Molina crack open some cold ones and count down the top eight ways to keep that bro bond alive, even as distance and adulthood try to get in the way. Discussion topics include: how to start your very…

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Top 7 Things Millennials and Baby Boomers Can Learn From Each Other With Cheri

8y ago

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Boomer versus Millennial. Rotary phones versus sexting. Sitcom jokes versus nonsense memes. Woman who thinks she's always right versus the devil boy she created in her own image. Yep, it's a generational battle here on New Rankings, as Teddy and his mother Cheri put the participation trophies aside and debate the top seven things Millennials and Ba…

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Top 8 Greek Gods with Sophie

8y ago

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Put on your toga, grab some ambrosia, and avoid any nearby swans -- it's time to go Greek! In this episode, Teddy and his friend Sophie, host of the She's All Fat podcast (@shesallfatpod), rank their top eight gods and godesses of Greek antiquity. Discussion topics include why Sophie seemingly only likes boring gods, Teddy's mini-ranking of Zeus' m…

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Top 7 Pieces of Marriage Advice with Courtney

8y ago

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Apologies for the three-week delay in content, Teddy regrets.......... nothing! Because he was off getting married! And from now on, every episode of the show will be marriage-themed! In this podcast, Teddy and his new wife Courtney rank their top seven pieces of marriage advice, since now that they have been married two weeks, they are cool expert…

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Top 7 Scariest Movies with Kevin Best

8y ago

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"The podcast... is coming... from inside the phone." In this episode, Teddy welcomes Kevin Best, host of the "Sequel Rewrite" podcast, back onto New Rankings, as they count down the top seven movies that most freaked them out as fifth graders at sleepovers. Discussion topics include: creepy copypastas, the Mandela Effect, the odd similarities betwe…

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FANTASY DRAFT! Monster Draft with Kit and Emma 1:24:08

8y ago1:24:08

1:24:08

"They did the draft... they did the monster draft!" In this Halloween spooktacular, the Steinkiller sibs assemble at the witching hour to prick their thumbs and pick the scariest, silliest monster squads. Memorable debates from the episode include: "Does a 'magical serial killer' qualify as a monster?" "Is Teddy just mansplaining the concept of mon…

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PART 2: Top 10 Funniest Sitcom Characters with Bill 58:41

8y ago58:41

58:41

In Part 2 of this very special New Rankings, Teddy and Bill Steinkellner, aka "the co-executive producer of 'Emeril,'" aka "Dad," finish their light-hearted romp through the top 10 funniest sitcom characters ever. Questions answered on this episode include: "Which sitcom star inspired Bill to abandon Catholicism and pursue a life in comedy?" "What …

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PART 1: Top 10 Funniest Sitcom Characters with Bill 1:02:28

8y ago1:02:28

1:02:28

Hey Rank & File! Starting this week, we're trying something new. As you know, some of our episodes -- like a bad "Will & Grace" from 2002 -- tend to get a bit super-sized. Yet we don't want you to get overwhelmed week-to-week and miss out on any of this hot, hot content! So beginning now, we'll be chopping up some of our lengthier episodes into two…

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Top 7 Thriller Books with Fred Klein 1:23:17

8y ago1:23:17

1:23:17

This episode of New Rankings finally answers the age-old question: can a Millennial and a nonagenarian become the best of friends? Teddy's guest is literary luminary (and 94-year old!) Fred Klein, former executive editor of Bantam Books and host of the popular Santa Barbara TV show, "Literary Gumbo." In a wide-ranging conversation, Ted and Fred dis…

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Top 7 Criminally Underseen TV Shows with Kit 1:57:25

8y ago1:57:25

1:57:25

Yes, it's officially fall: the kids are back in school, the apples are ripe for the picking, and all of the new TV shows are complete and utter garbage. Luckily, Teddy and Kit are here to help you out with that last one. In this episode, the self-important Steinkellner sibs rank their top seven criminally underseen television shows, ranging from fo…

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FANTASY DRAFT! Letters of the Alphabet with Max and James 1:21:13

8y ago1:21:13

1:21:13

Y is this the most dramatic New Rankings yet? O, U will C... In this episode, Teddy is joined by his friends, improvisers Max Sosna-Spear and James Mannion, for a topical twist on a standard ranking -- it's a fantasy draft! Only instead of picking football players for pretend points and imaginary teams, the boys are up to something even stupider: t…

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Top 10 Broadway Musicals with Cheri (featuring Emma) 1:38:36

8y ago1:38:36

1:38:36

"Let us... entertain you..." In this episode, Teddy is joined by his Mama Rose, Tony-nominated writer Cheri Steinkellner, and his Baby June, little sister Emma, as they rank the top ten Broadway musicals ever belted, from "Sweeney" to "Seussical." Along the way, they share some personal anecdotes, such as the night Young Emma upstaged Gigi Hadid in…

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MAILBAG! Mini-Rankings with Courtney and Emma 1:26:59

8y ago1:26:59

1:26:59

What is the best shape? The coolest fictional world? The nicest way to end a relationship? The sexiest Pokemon? Sure, such questions might not warrant a full episode of New Rankings on their own, but they are crucial, contentious issues all the same. Ergo... the mailbag! In this episode, Teddy, Courtney, and Emma select their favorite listener-sugg…

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Top 8 Tween Icons with Casey 1:32:56

8y ago1:32:56

1:32:56

In a desperate bid to win the affections of today's youth, Teddy enlists the help of Stanford-educated tweenologist (and his almost-sister-in-law) Casey Khademi to count down the top eight tween stars ever to grace the butt of a KMart bathing suit. This episode features cool and relevant stars of the pre-9/11 era such as Hilary Duff, Aaron Carter, …

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Top 10 Inspirational Animals with Sylvie 1:48:31

8y ago1:48:31

1:48:31

Balto. Baby Fiona. Christian. Harambe. Lamby. We know their stories. We weep when they die. We give them new life with our memes. But which of these animals inspires us the most? Whose paw is proudest of all? In this episode, Teddy and his good friend, literary agent Sylvie Greenberg, rank the top ten inspirational animals, from malformed cuties to…

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Top 9 Weirdest Things About Reality with Brian 1:46:22

8y ago1:46:22

1:46:22

Do you ever just stare at your feet and think, "whoa... I have feet"? Then this is the podcast for you! Join Teddy and his brother-in-law Brian Aspell, a.k.a. "Count Curioso," as they rank the top nine weirdest things about reality. Topics include circadian rhythms, circumcision, the base ten system, the blurry distinction between self and non-self…

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Top 8 Most Shocking Hollywood Deaths with Scott Michaels 1:47:45

8y ago1:47:45

1:47:45

Teddy and Courtney go all the way next door to hunt down this episode's expert, Scott Michaels, the founder of Dearly Departed Tours in LA. Together, they rank the top eight most shocking deaths in Hollywood history, covering such topics as the Benedict Canyon curse, Jayne Mansfield's death car, and the four most terrifying words in the English lan…

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Top 10 Sequels with Kevin Best 1:59:31

8y ago1:59:31

1:59:31

In this bloated, self-indulgent, cash grab of an episode, Teddy and his guest Kevin Best rank the top ten bloated, self-indulgent, cash grab movie sequels of all time! Important questions include: Why has everyone forgotten about Austin Powers? Is Godfather II actually that good? And of course, what the hell is an electric boogaloo? Also, don't for…

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Top 10 Logos with Nic 1:32:38

8y ago1:32:38

1:32:38

They're beautiful, they're everywhere, they're always watching you, even in your dreams... logos! In this episode, Teddy and his friend, poet Nic Reiner, rank their top ten logos in the world of business and beyond. Discussion topics include pantsless animals playing sports, happy ethnic food people, and all of the controversy surrounding a certain…

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Top 7 Lifehacks with Dio 1:11:49

8+ y ago1:11:49

1:11:49

What *is* a lifehack? According to Teddy's good friend, Slack designer Diogenes "Dio" Brito, lifehacks are little strategies for altering your environment in order to optimize your efficiency and enjoyment of life. According to Teddy, they're... well, Teddy doesn't really know what they are, but he sure likes his Squatty Potty a lot. Other lifehack…

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Top 10 Rules for Being Cool in High School (10 Years Ago) with Courtney 1:36:44

8+ y ago1:36:44

1:36:44

Two Roads Month* concludes as Teddy and Courtney log onto their LiveJournals, don their funniest Jesus t-shirts, and rank the top ten rules for being cool in high school (ten years ago). Topics include hickeys, hotboxing, cyberbullying, and Teddy's traumatic appearance in teen court. Featuring bonus content from both Teddy and Courtney's emo high s…

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Top 10 Rules for Being Cool in High School (in 2017) with Emma 1:30:34

8+ y ago1:30:34

1:30:34

Suh, fam! #thatawkwardmoment when a couple of ignorant bihs try to interpret Millennial culture and it's high-key sus AF but also low-key lit... In this episode, Teddy is joined by Emma in order to translate the previous sentence and also to rank the top ten rules for being cool in high school in the year 2017. Topics include Promposals, purple hug…

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Top 8 Tom Cruise Performances with Jake 1:26:31

8+ y ago1:26:31

1:26:31

Fidelio, Suppressive Persons! While a few good men may argue that Tom Cruise has lost that lovin' feelin', Teddy and Jake feel he's made all the right moves, and that to call him anything but a master of the muffin would be galactically stupid. So to honor the release of his upcoming film The Mummy, they're ranking the top eight Tom Cruise performa…

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Top 7 Graduation Speeches with Cheri 1:24:31

8+ y ago1:24:31

1:24:31

Congrats, grads! Four crazy years -- you made it! But... you're still woefully ignorant when it comes to real life, which can mean only one thing... twenty minutes of clichéd advice from a sweaty celebrity! In this episode, Teddy and his mother Cheri put their mortarboards together and rank the top seven commencement speeches ever delivered -- prof…

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Top 7 Coming-of-Age Novels with Kit 1:56:00

8+ y ago1:56:00

1:56:00

Teddy and Kit kick off Two Roads Month* by ranking the top 7 coming-of-age novels ever written. Topics include the adult/teen relationship genre, the twincest genre, and the origin of Kit and Teddy’s favorite angsty/inspirational teenage catchphrase, “You hear that world? We’re bigger than you!!!” *Two Roads Month = a month-long on-air celebration …

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Top 7 Badass Ways to be Vulnerable with Molina 1:22:22

8+ y ago1:22:22

1:22:22

The CosmoBros are back! Teddy welcomes love doctor and chief vulnerability officer Andrew Molina back to the podcast to rank their top seven badass vulnerability moves. Discussion topics include unleashing your inner melodrama, actually appreciating your partner's exes, and the art of giving the perfect "wug." NOTE: there are some mild static noise…

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Top 6 Murderers You Wouldn't Bring Home to Mom with Courtney 1:18:19

8+ y ago1:18:19

1:18:19

Let's belatedly celebrate Mother's Day by talking about... murder! Teddy and Courtney capitalize on society's current obsession with violent death by ranking the top 6 murderers they wouldn't take home to Mommy. Topics include murder hotels, killers who are ladieeeez, and for some reason, the Country Bears (you know, those robot bears at Disneyland…

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Top 10 Things Future Generations Will Be Confused By with Jordan 1:24:42

8+ y ago1:24:42

1:24:42

Future Week concludes with this dystopic and delightful glimpse seventy years hence, as Teddy and his good friend Jordan attempt to predict which currently-normal facets of society our great-grandchildren will find baffling. Exciting debates include: Why would any child ever watch baseball? How close are we to a super-creepy resurgence of Eugenics?…

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Top 7 Things We'd Like to See on the New iPhone with Jefferson Graham 54:16

8+ y ago54:16

54:16

It's *spooky alien noise* Future Week! In this ranking, Teddy speculates on the very near future with USA Today tech columnist Jefferson Graham, host of the acclaimed podcast Talking Tech. Teddy and Jeff look ahead to this September's likely launch of the new iPhone 8, and suggest some useful and absurd features they'd like to see on the device, in…

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Top 5 Disney Remakes We'd Rather See with Emma 1:13:27

8+ y ago1:13:27

1:13:27

Somebody’s poisoned the watering hole! In recent years, Disney has been on a mi$$ion to remake seemingly all of their animated classics, and yet if Beauty and the Beast was any indication, most of these films are destined to be, well, poor and unfortunate. Luckily, Teddy and Emma have taken it upon themselves to bring back the magic by pitching and…

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Top 8 Creative Mindhacks with Brian 1:35:18

8+ y ago1:35:18

1:35:18

What is a creative mindhack? Renowned mindhackologist -- and Teddy's brother-in-law -- Brian describes them as ways of expanding your consciousness (without the use of drugs). Join Teddy and Brian, a.k.a. "Count Curioso", as they rank their top eight cathartic and kooky mind-expanding techniques. Topics include Tarot divination, Al Roker, and imagi…

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Top 7 Unwritten Dating Rules (That You Should Break) with Molina 1:24:55

8+ y ago1:24:55

1:24:55

Unleash your inner CosmoGirl! Teddy is joined by close friend and Stanford d.school lecturer Andrew Molina to count down the top seven unwritten dating rules (that you should probably break). Topics include the importance of checking in with yourself (a.k.a. "pulling a Molina,") the fear associated with "showing your crazy," and only about two or t…

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Top 7 #ResistanceReads with Kit 1:31:02

8+ y ago1:31:02

1:31:02

Teddy is joined by his sister Kit to rank their top seven #ResistanceReads -- the non-fiction books and novels that have become particularly resonant in this weird, wild age of Trump. Topics discussed include the scary hilarity of Russian reality TV, why Glenn Greenwald is surprisingly just like a middle school girl, and how Monica Lewinsky saved s…

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Top 10 Mother-Son Duos of All Time with Cheri 1:17:06

8+ y ago1:17:06

1:17:06

As a way-too early Mother's Day gift, Teddy welcomes his mom Cheri onto the podcast to celebrate the top ten mother-son duos of all time. Topics covered include Marc Chagall's bizarre obsession with his mother's "rubbery legs," the highly controversial Barbra Streisand-Will Smith debate of 2009, and the magical mother-son audio clip that makes Tedd…

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Top 10 Fictional Basketball Players with Jake 1:16:23

8+ y ago1:16:23

1:16:23

In honor of March Madness and the upcoming NBA playoffs, Teddy and his best friend/best man Jake count down the top ten fictional basketball players of all-time. Discussions include the "I score, you strip" trope in modern hoops cinema, LeBron's desperate, childlike need for attention, and the sad and mysterious disappearance of Wayne Knight.…

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Top 8 Annoying Things People do on Instagram with Courtney 1:13:30

8+ y ago1:13:30

1:13:30

Teddy welcomes on fiancée and fellow judger of social media behavior, Courtney, for a candid discussion of the top eight annoying things people do on Instagram. Topics include: the political urgency of the tiny finger hand movement, the Oedipal compulsion that many millennials have to post photos of their parents as young sexy people, and Court and…

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Top 10 Debut Performances with Emma 1:11:44

8+ y ago1:11:44

1:11:44

To celebrate the premiere episode of New Rankings, Teddy welcomes little sister Emma on to debate the top ten debut performances across music, film, and life itself. Topics discussed include: Emma's newfound passion for pick-up artistry, the trouble with Graham crackers and little boys, and Teddy's theory that Susan Boyle could win an Oscar if only…